Vaudevillain

Dylan selected yes on the message, prompting another box to appear.

Gio’s Souvenirs and Haberdashery has been around almost as long as the man himself. The store is his pride and joy and refuses to sell it. Turvy is a hired villain intent on pushing the old man out of business! Repel Turvy’s assault!

“Did you guys get it?” Dylan shouted out the doors.

“Yeah!” someone shouted.

“Brought reinforcements, did we?” Turvy asked. The villain’s head seemed to move on a swivel as it looked from Approximo to the door. “No matter. This shall only take a moment.”

Dylan took a look at the villain. With a name like Turvy he expected something more clownlike. But instead of a big red nose, Turvy wore dark black sunglasses that masked his eyes. And instead of a spotted onesie, he wore a pitch black suit, tie, pants, and undershirt. Honestly the look was more fitting on a villain named Black Hole or something, and it rankled Dylan. One of the fun things about superheroes was the costume!

He channeled that frustration into his character. “Surrender, evildoer! Turn yourself in and your rehabilitation will be swift.”

“I think not,” Turvy answered. The villain snapped his fingers and suddenly Approximo found himself upside down. His head banged onto the floor as he fell in a heap.

“Now, come with me Gio. You’re going to have a talk with my employer.”

Approximo shifted a leg into one of the racks nearby and swung. It smacked Turvy in the side, sending him sprawling into a line of snowglobes. They crashed to the ground, spraying water and fake snow everywhere.

The hero struck again. Turvy snapped his fingers and Approximo found himself kicking in the other direction. He stopped his foot just in front of a rack of t-shirts. Gameset and Of a Kind picked this moment to come in.

“Careful friends, he has some kind of switching power!” Approximo said.

“A crass description,” Turvy said. He snapped again as Gameset and Of a Kind ran at him. Suddenly they were moving out the door. Approximo looked in surprise. One moment his friends were running at him, determined looks on their faces, the next they were all turned around.

“Oh, great,” Gameset said. “It’s going to be one of these fights. Aces, toss a grenade in.”

Turvy scoffed as Of a Kind duplicated on of his stun grenades and threw it toward the villain. “Have you learned nothing?” He snapped, sending the grenade back at the duo.

Gameset pulled out her hunting rifle and fired. The bullet struck the stun grenade, sending it flying to the left before it exploded. Turvy threw his hands up to avoid the blinding light. Approximo, however, wasn’t quite prepared.

“I have gone blind!” he shouted in panic.

“Blink it away!” he heard Gameset shout.

“I don’t have time for this nonsense,” Turvy said. He snapped his fingers, turning the shelves sideways to make a barrier before stomping toward Gio.

“Back off!” the old man roared. “I’m warning you!”

There was another crack from Gameset’s hunting rifle. “Not another step.”

The heroine had climbed the shelves and was sitting on top, her gun in hands. Of a Kind was nowhere to be found.

Turvy sighed and spun around as he snapped his fingers. “You are getting tiresome.”

Gameset found herself upside down and turned around from her position on the shelf. Approximo heard the clatter as she smacked the ground, then the bark of Of a Kind’s pistol.

“Ah!” Turvy shouted.

“Best keep your hands to yourself,” the hero said. “Would be a shame to lose the other.”

“It seems you’ve grown from a nuisance to a bother,” Turvy said with a sneer. “If you think you are at an advantage, you are sorely mistaken.”

Approximo blinked the last of the stars out of his eyes just in time to see Of a Kind’s body twist and fall from the ceiling, then spin again to fly across the room at Turvy. The villain reared back and connected a punch straight into Of a Kind’s jaw. The hero grunted as he flew into the shelves, knocking a line of hand carved architecture over.

“You unfriendly person!” Approximo shouted as he stood. “What right do you have to ruin this man’s hard work?”

“Might,” Turvy answered.

Approximo found himself staring at the man’s shoes again.

“Best stay on the floor if you know what’s good for you,” Turvy said.

“Prox, get Gio!” Gameset shouted.

Approximo turned to see his friend holding her hunting rifle in one hand and a golf club in the other. A number of golf balls had settled on the ground around her. Smoothly, she brought her hunting rifle up and fired off a shot before dropping it to the side and grabbing the golf club with both hands. Turvy responded by turning her around, but Gameset had a plan. As long as her powers worked the way she thought.

What she had told her friends earlier was that her power allowed her to use every piece of sporting equipment under the sun. That wasn’t exactly true. Her power let her perform a sport to the best of her ability. It hadn’t taken her long to see how broken the ability could get.

She likened it to Riptide’s first power. The ability to surf anything sounded goofy, but when anything is the operative term it left a lot open for interpretation. So when Gameset swung her golf club, she left everything up to the power and just focused on trying to get the golf ball into the hole. The hole in this case being Turvy’s suit pocket.

Gameset heard the thwap of a club striking a golf ball and watched as her shot smacked into one of the upturned shelves, flew up high enough to smack the corner of the light fixture, and traveled on its way toward Turvy’s chest.

She didn’t stop to see if she hit. Besides, a golf ball wouldn’t have the power to knock Turvy out. But it did have enough power to distract.

The villain growled in frustration as multiple golf balls started flying his way even as he twisted Gameset’s orientation. Each time the heroine’s hands would twist impossibly quick to hit the next golf ball near her. Eventually he had to resort to splitting his attention between the golf balls and the hero shooting them.

Approximo took that as his cue. Stealthily, he shifted into one of the many snowglobes rolling around. He clinked along, moving behind the counter to where Gio stood behind.

“New friend, are you alright?” he asked.

“I’ll live,” Gio said. “And I can repair the shop as long as Turvy doesn’t get me.”

“Then, you shall come with me,” Approximo said.

“And leave the shop? Are you mad?” Gio shouted.

The shout attracted Turvy’s attention.

“Oh, not good,” Approximo said.

He dove, scooping Gio into his arms and shifting his torso to match the counter. He heard a thunk as pieces of glass, falling at him due to Turvy’s power, hit him. Dylan looked at his health to make sure it hadn’t gotten too low but found his armor had blocked most of the damage.

“I do not think you are going to have a say in this matter,” Approximo told Gio. “I must get you to safety.”

Gio complained as Approximo picked up the NPC and darted toward the back. Turvy tried to use his power, but a gold ball hit him in the head just as he tried. The counter went spinning instead, crashing into pieces as it fell from the ceiling.

“Get back here!” Turvy shouted.

“I do not have to listen to you!” Approximo shouted as he ran.

He made it out the back door and into the street. Gio struggled against him. “Let me go I can’t leave the store.”

“The store is too dangerous for you right now,” Approximo said. “We are finding you a safe space.”

Dylan’s messenger pinged. He opened it to see a message from Oro.

OroJackson:

Turvy is chasing you. Keep Gio in hand and don’t get further than a hundred feet away. We’ll back you up.

“Come, I know the perfect place to go,” Approximo said.

“Let me go!” Gio answered.

Dylan shifted his arm into a barrel he saw at a nearby store. One without a lid. He stuck Gio inside and placed his other arm over. That would let him focus on moving.

Turvy exploded the back door outward with his power as Approximo started dashing across the street.

“Get back here!” the villain roared. He tried to use his power, only for another golf ball to dash him across the face and break his focus. One of the barrels that Dylan spied earlier suddenly flew toward Turvy as if yanked with a rope. The villain quickly sent the barrel toward Approximo, who jumped over the attack as it bounced.

Approximo turned a corner and Turvy began to chase.

“Yes!” Of a Kind cheered. “One down, two more to go!”

“Next one’s the hard one though, right?” Gameset asked.

The hero nodded. “Word on the street is a gang of villains are going after one of the Piazza statues.”

Jack made a face, breaking character. “Please tell me we’re able to store it in our inventory.”

“I don’t see why we can’t,” Oro answered with a smile.

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