Chapter 235: Self-Rescue through Innovation
With a consensus reached, France and Britain forged a peace agreement in Amsterdam.
"I know our French friends made a deal with the British, which has left some of our comrades feeling uneasy. They're worried that we might have been betrayed by the French. The British claim that under this agreement, the French can no longer sell military weapons to us. But, my friends, today's newly arrived ships and the cargo they've brought with them will prove this to be nothing but a rumor. Come and see our new acquisitions."
Soldiers gathered around Joyce, gazing at the wooden crates by his side. The crates remained unopened, and their contents were hidden beneath layers of oil-soaked paper labeled "Agricultural Supplies."
Beneath these words was a smaller, bold-printed line: "Highly Effective Bird Deterrent."
"A 'Highly Effective Bird Deterrent'? What in the world is this?" one soldier asked.
Joyce gestured with a sweep of his hand. "The pry bar is over there; why don't you open it and find out?"
One soldier, taking the pry bar, popped open the wooden crate. Inside lay layers of carefully wrapped oiled paper, concealed beneath which were wood shavings used for padding. As they pushed aside the shavings, a long, cloth-wrapped object was revealed. This item was so familiar to them that even before unwrapping the oiled cloth, they knew what it was.
"Is this thing really a 'Highly Effective Bird Deterrent'?" The soldier had already skillfully removed the rifle from its oiled casing, aiming it briefly.
"This thing is meant to deter birds, and it does so effectively," another soldier chuckled. "John, if there were ten birds on a tree, and you fired at one, how many would be left on the tree?"
"Come on! I'm not a fool," John replied, returning the rifle to its oilcloth bag.
"And what's this? What is this thing?" another soldier pointed to another box, which read, "Highly Effective Wild Boar Deterrent."
"Open it up!" someone suggested.
"Let's not rush. Let's make a bet, and the prize will be a pack of captured English tobacco. I bet there are broadswords inside. Anyone object?" Sergeant O'Hara started the commotion.
"O'Hara, do you really have those? How many goodies have you squirreled away?" someone asked mockingly.
"Speak up if you have any, or else get lost, you paupers!" O'Hara retorted with disdain.
"O'Hara, how many do you have left? I'll bet with you. I'll wager my stash of French brandy," Joyce suddenly chimed in.
"What? Sir... Sir, you can't cheat me! I've painstakingly accumulated these...," O'Hara realized his mistake and hastily said.
"Sir, don't trust him. Just yesterday, this scoundrel, under the pretext of sharing, distributed my last bit of tobacco. And now he miraculously has some again," another soldier chimed in.
Amid the laughter, Joyce generously produced the bottle of brandy, and O'Hara had no choice but to retrieve his pack of tobacco.
"Sir, what exactly is this 'Highly Effective Wild Boar Deterrent'? Finally, someone circled back to the original question.
"I have no idea. I've never opened one myself," Joyce said. "But I suppose it's probably just a regular landmine. There are two more boxes over there that look quite similar, and they're also labeled 'Wild Boar Deterrent.' The only difference is that the one over there uses 'Wild Boar' in the plural. I'd guess that one should contain broadsword mines."
"Open it, open it," the crowd eagerly urged.
So, the box labeled in the singular form "Wild Boar" was opened, and indeed, it contained common landmines that could only blow off a pig's hoof. The box labeled in the plural form "Wild Boar" was opened, and it was filled with broadsword mines. However...
"Sergeant, look, the writing on these is different," a soldier picked up a broadsword mine and called out to Joyce.
"Let me see..." Joyce examined the broadsword mine and saw the following words imprinted on the front: "This Side Facing Pigs!"
"Comrades, you've all seen it! Any notion that the French have betrayed us is nothing but a rumor. Believing in such tales would be as absurd as being blown up by one of these things," Joyce laughed heartily.
"Sergeant, if that's the case, why did our French comrades make peace with the British and even suggest that we temporarily cease hostilities with the British?" someone asked.
"Because, whether it's the British, the French comrades, or us, we all need some time to recuperate. You should know that the French comrades overthrew the tyrant in their homeland and established a republic. As a result, under the leadership of the British, all the feudal despots in Europe united to wage war against our French comrades. Their goal was to turn France back into a kingdom ruled by a tyrant.
However, our French comrades defeated them. Over the years, through several wars, those feudal monarchs who initially declared war on France were one by one defeated. But in France, the scale of the war is much larger than here, and the losses on the French side are substantial. You see, this year, we've been continuously fending off counter-sweeps for months, and we're running out of time to plant potatoes. The French comrades have been resisting encirclement for years, and none of us are invincible; we all need a breather."
Everyone nodded in agreement, imagining how difficult it must have been for the French comrades during their years of resistance. They all understood that it was time for them to catch their breath.
"Furthermore, let's talk about us. The British are ruthless. In recent years, they've either swept in just when it was time to plant potatoes or right before harvest. What's their goal? To prevent us from planting potatoes properly and starve us? This year, when we were planting potatoes, the British pulled another stunt. Although we've driven them out of our base, it still delayed us. If, during the harvest, the British come back to cause trouble, our lives won't be easy.
And then there are the British themselves. During this major sweep, we've killed more British than in any previous campaign. They fear death as well. The reason they keep sweeping us is that they believe they can blockade our sea routes and starve us. Some time ago, our French comrades fought a battle at sea against the British and broke their blockade. They know they can't block us anymore, and they've suffered defeats in other places. They can't catch their breath either, so they're also taking a break."
"Comrades, this is why we, the French comrades, and those damned British all need a ceasefire. This ceasefire isn't an end, but just a break in between. Everyone is using this break to get a head start on catching their breath and to eliminate those who haven't caught their breath yet."
"So, comrades, this ceasefire isn't for resting. We can't let our guard down because of it and go to sleep. President Lazare said we need to use this time to resume production, make our potato crop bountiful, and pile our warehouses high with potatoes. Even if the British catch their breath and return for a major sweep, we won't be afraid of them."
"But comrades, many of the potatoes we planted this year have been destroyed by the British and those black dogs. Even if we replant them now, it will still affect our harvest. If we proceed as we have in the past, we won't be able to harvest as many potatoes as usual this year. We need to catch our breath properly. Comrades, we need to come up with a way to breathe easy. We not only need to recoup the losses inflicted by the British and those black dogs but also strive for a bumper harvest. This way, we can catch our breath ahead of others, grow stronger, and eventually defeat the British, achieving our nation's independence."
"Sergeant, what should we do?"
"Yes, yes, Sergeant, tell us what to do."
The soldiers chimed in one by one.
Seeing their enthusiasm, Joyce climbed onto a crate labeled in the plural form "Highly Effective Agricultural Wild Boar Deterrent" and said to everyone, "Our comrades from the Union are mobilizing the locals in every village to replant crops and try to recover the losses as much as possible. They are also expanding farmland, increasing cultivation areas, working in the fields more diligently, weeding often, and keeping watch. We mustn't let rats, rabbits, or wild boars damage our potatoes. We need to recover the losses."
"Comrades, the local comrades are working very hard, and our fellow countrymen are putting in a lot of effort. They are now sleeping in the potato fields day and night, working hard in agriculture. Shouldn't we join them? So, President Lazare asked me, 'Do our division's soldiers still have the strength, after military training, to plant some potatoes themselves and alleviate the burden for the local comrades and our fellow countrymen?' How do you think I replied?"
"Sergeant, what did you say?" the soldiers asked one by one.
"What did I say? At a time like this, should I be hesitant? Of course, I said, 'President, me and our soldiers, we used to be potato farmers. Planting potatoes is our expertise. If it weren't for those bloody British, who the hell would want to fight all the time and not plant potatoes? There's no problem with this. Because our division's lads were originally the best farmers in the world when it came to planting potatoes. Just wait and see, not only can we grow enough potatoes to feed ourselves, but we can also support the Second Division!'"
"The president said, 'The Second Division thinks they're better at farming than us. They're even willing to support us when the time comes.' What do you think, can we let the Second Division support us? We need to let them know why we're the First Division, and they're the Second Division. What do you say!"
The soldiers cheered in agreement.
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