Chapter 234: Business Dealings
"Britain's presence in Hanover poses a threat to the security of France," Talleyrand replied without hesitation.
"Hanover is also the sacred domain of our King," Sir Humphrey, Britain's new Foreign Minister, countered, "According to your nation's principles, you should recognize that private property is inviolable. Hanover is, indeed, the inviolable private property of our King."
"Ah, Sir, our legal code states that we must protect the legitimate private property of the French people. I dare say your King is not a citizen of France."
"But didn't you just say that the principles of the Declaration of the Rights of Man are universal, and that you, the French, care about the human rights of foreigners as well?"
"Yes, we do have such principles, but, Sir, you must understand that matters have priorities. We ensure the human rights of the French people first, then the human rights of Catholics on the European continent, then the human rights of other Europeans and Catholics in other regions, and then... well, you can see, your esteemed King's interests are rather low on the list. At least, I think it would be challenging to protect your King's private property before the basic human rights of the Irish people are guaranteed."
"Mr. Talleyrand, can I understand from your words that if we are willing to ensure the human rights of the Irish people, then your country would be willing to protect my King's private property, or, to be more explicit, if we make concessions in Ireland, can we exchange that for concessions in Hanover?"
"Ah, Sir, I didn't say that, but... we find your proposal to be very peaceable..."
In reality, neither Talleyrand nor Sir Humphrey had any genuine interest in peace. Everyone knew that this negotiation was fundamentally just a formal ceasefire. However, both sides had sincere reasons for needing this ceasefire, albeit for different motivations. They all believed that these issues would ultimately be resolved through war, and thus, it was more straightforward to set aside disputes for now. After all, having a few more traps to spring in the future wouldn't hurt; they could always use them as an excuse to go to war later.
So, they earnestly discussed this exchange.
In the end, the French and the British reached a consensus on these terms:
Regarding Ireland, both parties believed that they should try to resolve the matter through peaceful means.
The British committed to ensuring the inalienable human rights of the Irish people, their right to choose their faith, and granting the Irish people a degree of autonomy (though they wouldn't openly admit the latter).
The French, for their part, expressed understanding of the British perspective on Irish sovereignty and pledged not to encourage Ireland to secede from the United Kingdom. However, they emphasized the traditional friendship between the French and the Irish people and the need to preserve free trade.
France assured Britain that it would not sell large-scale weapons to Ireland (France: After all, what we sell are civilian items, can't you believe us? For example, rifles are for hunting; hand grenades are for fishing; and various landmines are solely for defending the Irish people's radishes in their gardens from those alien invaders trying to steal them.)
As for the issue of Hanover, France respected the private property owned by the King of England as the Duke of Hanover and the income derived from it. They also respected his right to participate in political activities in Hanover. However, the final status of Hanover would depend on the choice of the Hanoverian people. To ensure that the Hanoverians could freely express their will, France could not accept the presence of any British military forces in Hanover.
Additionally, to secure Hanover's safety, at the invitation of the Hanoverian people, France would maintain a limited military presence in Hanover.
Britain expressed its support for the King's legitimate interests in Hanover and pledged to do everything in its power to promote the restoration of these rights through peaceful means.
Having temporarily acknowledged the current situation, Talleyrand immediately raised a new matter.
"All right, Sir Humphrey, I believe we can finally set aside those annoying matters and discuss something that can truly benefit us all."
"Are you implying...?"
"Sir, you see, in recent years, Britain has blockaded the French coast, preventing us from engaging in profitable trade. We, too, have hindered your country from acquiring raw materials and selling goods on the European continent. This is not a good situation because it hinders the prosperity of both our nations. So, you may be aware that France has signed trade agreements with many European countries based on mutual open markets. To promote friendship between our nations and ensure lasting peace, I suggest that we can reach an equitable agreement on trade between our two countries as well."
Sir Humphrey was very interested in this proposal. In fact, since France defeated Prussia, nearly the entire European market had closed its doors to the British.
As much as the French were engaged in smuggling activities when they were under blockade initially, the British, too, were continuously involved in smuggling with the Dutch and cooperating to bring goods into Europe. Truth be told, in the Rhenish League, though there was a legal blockade against Britain, it wasn't enforced very diligently. Nevertheless, even this relatively lenient blockade had caused significant trouble for the British economy.
Added to this was the economic strain resulting from their recent military failures and the drain on resources in the Irish quagmire. Britain's recent economic situation was far from ideal. Opening up the European markets to Britain at this time would be a beautiful prospect. In fact, this was a crucial objective in the ongoing peace negotiations – Britain had to quickly regain its strength before the next decisive war.
However, no matter how you looked at it, this was more advantageous for Britain, and the fact that the French had brought it up voluntarily made Sir Humphrey somewhat hesitant.
"Of course, free trade encompasses many aspects, not just limited to goods," Talleyrand continued, "It should also include culture, arts, and the reasonable flow of talent. For instance, I have some friends in the Bordeaux region who might become the new ambassador to England. You know, this friend of mine is a supporter of ours, and he has many vineyards in Bordeaux, producing some outstanding wines. I've heard that in your country, the wine business is quite lucrative. Well, he's a young man but quite generous... If possible, I hope he could receive your attention during his time in your country."
Sir Humphrey immediately understood what was being implied. Buying an ambassadorship and then using that position to conduct business and make money was a practice the British had invented, and in an alternate dimension, they continued this fine tradition even into the 21st century. Whether you were an illiterate who could claim the American army liberated Auschwitz, as long as you paid, you could buy yourself an ambassadorship.
So, if we translate the underlying meaning of this statement, it would be something like: "There's a guy who sells wine, and he gave me a lot of money to secure an ambassador position in your country. He paid for this position, and of course, he intends to do business and make money, as he's heard that French wine is popular in England. If you help him make money, he's a good guy willing to offer bribes."
"That's not a problem," Sir Humphrey said, "I have a friend here who will also require your assistance…"
This diplomatic negotiation, like many others in history, involved a delicate dance between national interests, diplomatic politeness, and personal ambitions, all set against the backdrop of a tumultuous era in European history.
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