Pursuing My Rejected Alpha

305 The Somber Talk About Life And Death

Gordon cleared his throat.

“Let’s not talk here,” he said, putting one hand on Ronan’s and Lucien’s shoulder each. “Alpha Ronan, Lucien, let’s go to my private space instead.”

“Lucien...”

Ronan reached out to touch Lucien, but his hand was smacked away again.

“I said, don’t touch me,” Lucien snapped at him.

He stalked away without even granting Ronan a single glance.

“...”

Gordon took Ronan and Lucien to his office.

It was maybe around half of Ronan’s office with sparse furniture. The most interesting feature was probably the half dome made of glass that covered half of the office.

.....

Beneath the dome was a bunch of fluffy lounge sofas, probably serving as a sunbathing area for Gordon. A few potted trees loomed above the chairs, acting as natural shades.

“Talk it among yourselves, children,” Gordon tapped on the couple’s backs. “Take your time.”

Gordon left to give them some space. The door closed with a soft click.

Swallowing hard, Ronan tried calling Lucien again.

“Lulu.”

Lucien looked away from Ronan and gave no response. He was busy wiping his face.

The endless tears were so embarrassing, so humiliating. Lucien did not want Ronan to look at him when he was in such a pathetic state.

“Lulu!”

Impatient, Ronan threw himself around Lucien from behind and locked the latter’s upper half with his arms.

“Ronan, let me go,” Lucien snapped. “Let go!”

“No!” Ronan roared.

“Lulu, don’t be like this. Please just let me explain, okay? I am not trying to force you to give birth. I would never. Please don’t be angry.”

Lucien broke into cheerless laughter. Shaking his head repeatedly, he said, “Ronan, you are so foolish. Do you think that I care about that? If I could give birth to your child, I would have done so a long time ago. Didn’t I tell you that in the past?”

“...”

Ronan let out a low, frustrated roar.

He rubbed his forehead against Lucien’s back like a spoiled pup, trying hard to curry favor with his Luna.

“Then why are you so angry? I don’t understand. Lulu, please tell me. If I did anything wrong, I will change. I never want to make you angry or sad.”

“Let me go first,” Lucien said. “I can barely move with you locking my arms like this.”

“... Oh.”

Ronan loosened his grip.

Lucien walked toward a couch and let himself fall on top of it.

“Baby?”

Ronan came over and sat next to Lucien. He put an arm around Lucien’s shoulder and squeezed it.

“What is it?”

Lucien turned to look at the Alpha.

The pair of caramel-brown eyes gazed into the pair of greenish-blue eyes.

“It’s this,” Lucien said curtly, holding Ronan’s farewell letter between his two fingers.

Ronan stared at the folded piece of paper. He did not even recognize it.

“What’s this?”

“...”

Lucien unfolded it and held the piece of paper up in front of Ronan.

Ronan gaped at the content. He completely forgot about it.

“Oh, Goddess,” he rolled with his eyes and groaned. “Oh no. Did they send it with the package???”

“... You think?”

Ronan sighed.

“It is embarrassing, but I still don’t understand why you are angry. I wrote it in the event of...”

“Of your demise,” Lucien ended the sentence for his mate. “Right?”

“Right,” Ronan confirmed. “I have to leave something, right? I can’t just...”

The Alpha made a huge gesture with his hand clumsily. “I can’t just let them send you the package without any personal message from me. That would be too crude.”

Lucien stared at Ronan, his gaze as cold as ice and as sharp as a dagger.

“... So um, why are you upset?”

Lucien rose to his feet and grabbed Ronan by his collar.

“Alpha Ronan, let me tell you why I am upset. You left me at the Night Prowler Pack House alone,” he squinted at his foolish mate. “When I opened my eyes, you were not there. You did not even write a message, let alone call! I had to depend on Bjorn and Kinnon to give me some news!!!

Day after day, I worried about you and whatever was going on out there. Meanwhile, you went and wrote this farewell letter for me. Exactly what did you take me for???”

The Alpha stared at his mate, his lips parting from awe.

“I never wanted to be your bitch, your weaker partner. I am also an alpha werewolf, damn it! If you were so worried about dying, why didn’t you call me? I would have been there for you! I wanted to be there for you!!!”

“Lulu...”

“Instead, you decided to die alone and you still had the gall to leave me this message? Ronan Silverback, don’t you think that you were too arrogant??? Too selfish???”

“Lulu...”

Ronan pulled at Lucien’s arms and forced him into a hug.

“Let me go!” Lucien shouted. “Ronan Silverback, let me go!”

“No,” Ronan sighed. “Lulu, you don’t understand... I killed you with my own hands once. I can’t bear to lose you again.”

The Alpha buried his nose into the crook at Lucien’s neck. The bursting flame in Lucien’s heart was extinguished right away when he heard Ronan’s words.

“I didn’t die,” he said, clawing into his mate’s back resentfully. “Ronan, I am still alive.”

“Heh.”

Ronan chuckled.

“When I close my eyes at night, sometimes I still dream about it. You, bathed in blood with a silver blade embedded in your chest. In those dreams, you don’t get to wake up.”

“...”

“Lulu, at that time I realized something. If I had to choose between losing you to another man or death, I will choose the former.”

“Pffft. Then you will even come to congratulate me on my wedding with another or what?”

Ronan pinched Lucien’s chin and shut him up with a kiss.

“Sorry, but I’d rather die than watch you marry someone else.”

“...”

“I can’t live without you, Lulu. Don’t you understand?”

Ronan’s passionate love declaration earned him another glare and two sets of claws on his back.

“And don’t you understand that I am the same??? Maybe I also want to follow you into the grave!”

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