Maybe a Fake Gintama

"Shinpachi-kun, the food isn't the issue." Katsura folded his hands, frowning slightly with seriousness on his face, and said, "If you offend the mother, there's a possibility that she won't buy Kyubei-kun the RBI Baseball game afterward.!"

"... And our dreams of gathering at Kyubei-kun's place after school to play RBI Baseball will be shattered."

After saying that, Katsura's face revealed a look of difficulty.

"I don't remember having that dream, ever!" Shinpachi knocked hard on the table, his veins popping out as he complained loudly, "And what's with your obsession with playing RBI Baseball?! You've gone way back to being little kids! The mom isn't even here!"

As he spoke, Shinpachi turned to look at the guests who had cast strange looks at Gintoki and the others. Then, he turned around and continued, "And the sharp eyes staring at us belong to all the celebrities, not the mom! This isn't like the birthday parties we held as children! Get a clue!"

At the same time, the whispers of the guests were also heard...

"Who are those people?"

"Are they acquaintances of Kyubei-dono? No way, how is that possible?"

Listening to the whispers of the guests and the countless looks of disdain, Shinpachi's face instantly showed some embarrassment. Then he quickly bent down and took a deep breath to look at Gintoki and the other two.

"Oguri Shunnosuke is staring right at us!" Shinpachi reminded in a low voice, "He's not even trying to hide it! We're here as Kyubei's friends. If we do anything weird, it'll shame Kyubei!"

"Don't worry!"

As he spoke, Gintoki stood up from his seat with his hands crossed. At the same time, Katsura and Hasegawa also stood up, and the three of them had the same serious expression.

"We have participated in various birthday parties since we were young, and have eaten countless meals," Gintoki said with a serious face, "We are so-called birthday party professionals!"

"'Birthday Fighter!" Gintoki, Katsura, and Hasegawa spoke up at the same time.

"You only go for the free food!" Shinpachi retorted crazily.

"What do you mean by Birthday Fighter? It's more reasonable to say that it's a freeloader!"

Hasegawa ignored Shinpachi's ridicule. He crossed his arms and explained to himself, "Birthday Fighters don't do anything to make the birthday boy or girl look bad. Even if it's someone weak, who usually gets bullied at school..."

As he spoke, Hasegawa looked at Shinpachi, and his face revealed a somewhat genuine smile, "You make them look good in front of their mother! This is an absolute rule!"

"By doing that, you earn the reputation of a person who makes birthday parties more fun." Katsura nodded and continued, "That leads to invitations to more birthday parties. So you must not mouth off to the mother. Even if you enter the house and find that it smells like a restroom, you must never mention that fact. Because it'll affect their trust in you."

"In short, leave it to us. Don't worry." Gintoki looked at Shinpachi and comforted him, "Students from other schools have also been invited this time..."

As he spoke, Gintoki clenched his right fist and turned to look at Katsura and Hasegawa, "Pattern B-2. Compute their data, stat!"

"Roger!" Katsura and Hasegawa stood up at the same time. At the same time, they clasped their right hands in front of their chests and turned to look at Gintoki as if they were swearing an oath.

Looking at the three "reliable adult males"(I think) in front of him, a big red # character appeared on the back of Shinpachi's head at this time he retorted without the slightest hesitation, "You're all idiots! Your presence here is making Kyubei look bad! You're the ones who smell like restrooms!!"

...

After a small farce, Kawaki and the others sat down one after another. At this time, Shinpachi had already calmed down.

"Even if you don't do anything unnecessary, they will let you eat and drink to your heart's content," Shinpachi persuaded earnestly, "This birthday party is in a buffet style."

As he spoke, Shinpachi turned around and glanced at the long table of food not far behind him. Then, he turned around and continued to explain, "After the party begins, you can eat as much food as you want. So, you just have to be honest..."

Suddenly, Shinpachi noticed something. He rubbed his eyes and looked behind him again.

Looking at the small yellow tent erected in front of the table, Shinpachi asked doubtfully, "Ah? What is that?"

At the same time, the guests also found the small tent in front of the table of food and began to whisper...

"Wait, what is that tent?"

"Wouldn't they be in the way when we go to get food? What is that? Is there a mountaineer?"

As soon as the guest finished speaking, the small tent in front of the table suddenly twisted a few times, and then the zipper on the tent was pulled open. A girl wearing a red sleeping bag, who seemed to have just woken up and was still in a daze, stuck her head out.

"It hasn't started yet-aru?" Kagura narrowed her eyes and muttered to herself with some frustration.

In the next moment, Shinpachi directly jumped up and arrived in front of Kagura in a flash. Without any hesitation, he kicked Kagura and the tent away. At the same time, he roared, "Why are you acting like someone lined up for an overnight release?!"

"Why are you putting your body on the line for a buffet?!" Shinpachi looked at Kagura, who was lying on the ground like a worm wrapped in a sleeping bag, and pointed at her, "That's enough, you bastard!"

"I put a tent up to mark my place in line, not my body-aru." Kagura replied.

"Don't say such naive words! It really makes people angry!" Shinpachi was a little mad, "That's enough! Hurry up and go back to your seat. This is too shameful!"

As he spoke, Shinpachi came to Kagura's side and bent down to pick up Kagura, who was like a worm, and said again, "Even if you don't have to work so hard, you can still fill your stomach. There are no greedy people here!"

"I don't want-aru! There must be such people!" Kagura struggled with all her might, "My spring roll will definitely be snatched away-aru! It will definitely be snatched away-aru! I want to stay here forever! If I can eat spring roll until I'm full, I will eat until spring comes-aru!"

"Whether it's spring or autumn, I will help you roll it!" Shinpachi pleaded, "Please! Kagura-chan! Hurry up and sit back down! If you do this again, we'll be chased out! Look, we've all been laughed at by everyone!"

As he spoke, Shinpachi looked at Oguri Shunnosuke who was walking slowly towards this side with a plate, "Look, even Oguri-kun is looking..."

As he spoke, Shinpachi suddenly noticed the plate in Oguri Shunnosuke's hand. At the same time, Oguri Shunnosuke also realized that something was wrong. He immediately turned around and quickly returned to his seat and sat back down. However, what was different from before was that there were several drops of cold sweat on Oguri Shunnosuke's face... It was an awkward cold sweat.

"Just now, Oguri-kun planned to line up... Just now, Oguri-kun thought that it was time to get food, so he came to line up..." The corners of Shinpachi's mouth twitched as he said, "It's really bad. Not only Kyubei but even Oguri-kun has been implicated by us and lost face!"

...

"Not bad, Kagura-chan. You actually thought of bringing a tent to participate in the birthday party." Kawaki reached out to touch Kagura's head and praised, "You are the only one in the world who can do this. How did you think of this method? You might really be a genius."

"It's just an ordinary "boom", I just remembered it-aru." Kagura smiled a little embarrassedly, "And a girl at my age has more imagination and creativity-aru."

"Kagura-chan, that is not something to be proud of. And it has nothing to do with the imagination and creativity you said." Shinpachi squinted his eyes and spoke with an expressionless face. Then he looked at Kawaki beside him and said, "And Kawaki-san, Kagura-chan's behavior just now is not worthy of praise. As an adult, you should criticize her."

"Criticism?" Kawaki crossed his arms over his chest with one hand while supporting his chin with the other. Then, he raised his head and looked at Kagura with a serious expression. He said, "Kagura-chan! What you did just now was wrong!"

"Yes, yes, you must criticize her like this." Shinpachi nodded.

"It's wrong to only stare at spring rolls!" Kawaki said seriously, "Fruit, fresh vegetables, and meat are also very important! For a girl at your age, vitamin supplements are especially important!"

"Stop!" Shinpachi complained, "Do you only care about vitamins?!"

"Shinpachi is right! Kawaki, you are too narrow-minded!" Gintoki scolded, "For a little girl of her age, the most important thing should be calcium!"

"There is no difference between the two of you! Is all your focus on food?!" Shinpachi retorted angrily.

"No, it's vitamins and protein!" Kawaki retorted.

"No, it's calcium!" Gintoki refused to budge.

"It's vitamins and protein!"

"It's calcium!"

"Vitamins and protein!!"

"Calcium!!"

"Do you want a fight, you bastard!" Kawaki stood up and looked down at Gintoki with an unhappy face.

"Come if you have the ability! Bastard!" Gintoki also stood up and looked at Kawaki with a grin.

Shinpachi couldn't take it anymore and stood up. He expressionlessly walked behind Kawaki and Gintoki, who were pulling each other by the collar as if they were about to fight at any moment.

He slowly stretched out both of his hands and extended them to their shoulders...

"You two better stop before you go too far! Bastard!"

As he roared, Shinpachi pressed the two of them onto their seats.

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