Loser System and Berserker Me

A massive antlion colony was marching through the desert with heavy footsteps.

Antlions were insects that dug little pits in the ground. Whenever ants passed by their traps, they would hurl gravel at them and drag them into the pit for food.

However, the antlions marching across the desert were nothing like that. They were much larger, with their pincers as big as halberds. Cavalrymen would have to flee with fearful hearts when faced with such terrifying monsters.

A mage dressed in a silk robe was resting atop the largest antlion with closed eyes.

Tak tak tak, tak tak tak!

Weird sounds suddenly echoed from afar. It sounded like heavy footsteps treading on sand.

“…” The mage dressed in a silk robe opened his eyes. “The Lizard Queen?”

He quickly cast Voice Amplification and shouted over, “Lizard Queen! Please don’t misunderstand. It’s me, Antlion Whisperer. I don’t mean any ill intent. I came with my servants to…”

Despite his anxious explanations, the Lizard Queen didn’t slow down.

“I know that it’s you, Antlion Whisperer, but there’s no misunderstanding. You’re the one I’m attacking. Go, my babies!”

The sand monitors charged forth.

The soft sand was not an easy surface to travel on, but they didn’t slow the sand monitors at all. With ferocious hisses, they split into two teams and flanked the antlions.

“Dig, dig!”

The Antlion Whisperer realized that the Lizard Queen intended to fight him.

Eyy, the Lizard Queen is too fiery-tempered. Otherwise, she would have been perfect.

He wasn’t intending to become a punching bag, but his antlions needed time to dig holes whereas the sand monitors traveled faster than horses on sand. It wouldn’t be fun to bear the brunt of their charge.

So, the Antlion Whisperer downed a potion, murmured a chant, and pointed on the sand.

“Crumble!”

The sand collapsed, forming dozens of giant pits.

The antlions leaped into the pits and settled inside. The walls of the pit were so slippery that sand monitors would struggle to climb out once they fell in, not to mention that the antlions and their pincers made frightening enemies in narrow spaces.

It was practically a death trap.

Unfortunately, there weren’t enough pits for all the antlions.

The charging sand monitors slammed into the antlions, knocking them into the sky before clamping their powerful jaws down on them.

The antlions had sharp shells that would take the sand monitors some time to bite through, but the immense pressure still left them screeching in pain. The human followers in charge of taking care of the antlions suffered a worse fate; just the impact of the charge killed most of them.

Mercy was not a language the sand monitors spoke.

Seeing the sand monitors toying with his antlions, the Antlion Whisperer clicked his tongue in annoyance. He stood up and bowed, saying, “My beautiful queen, is your anger placated yet?”

“Not yet!”

The Lizard Queen appeared with her mount, under the escort of the remaining sand monitors.

“It’s such a beautiful night…” She raised her arm, basking her smooth skin under the radiant moonlight. Her posture was so graceful that it looked as if she would dance. “…but of all things, I had to bump into a repulsive fellow! My anger won’t be quelled that easily!”

The Antlion Whisperer smiled awkwardly.

Compared to the graceful Lizard Queen, he, a balding middle-aged man, was indeed lacking in the looks department, though he wasn’t bothered by it. He reined in his smile and spoke with a voice tinging with excitement, “My beautiful queen, I have good news. Zhujubo’s city lord…”

“Hmph!” the Lizard Queen rudely interjected while twirling her hair, “I know. Zhujubo has been encircled, and that scrooge is seeking reinforcement. He sent an envoy to you too and offered generous terms, right?”

Ah? That fellow didn’t just request reinforcement from me?

The Antlion Whisperer was displeased to learn that. He was still thinking about sharing this good news with the Lizard Queen. “I see that you have also heard the news. That’s wonderful. My beautiful queen, this is a good opportunity. Why don’t we work together?

“My antlions specialize in defensive warfare. The gravel they spit deals far more damage than human slingers. Even a heavy infantryman won’t be able to withstand it. And if the enemy falls into their pits, they will be trapped with a powerful monster with nigh impenetrable defenses.

“On the other hand, my beautiful queen, your sand monitors are the indisputable rulers of the desert. If we combine our forces, who can compete with us on this turf?”

The Antlion Whisperer trembled in excitement.

“Those rag tags encircling Zhujubo won’t be our match, and I doubt that cowardly scrooge will dare to break his promise…”

“I’m not interested,” the Lizard Queen coldly interjected.

“By then… Ah?” The Antlion Whisperer was stunned by the Lizard Queen’s rejection. “My beautiful queen, won’t you reconsider the matter? I…”

“Hmph!” The Lizard Queen eyed at the Antlion Whisperer with upshot eyebrows. “I know what’s in your mind. This cooperation is just a pretext for you to approach me. Don’t even think about it! Look in the mirror! You’re a toad lusting over swan flesh. Know your place! I have no interest in you whatsoever.

“Scram as far as you can with your antlions, or else I’ll be getting serious!”

“My beautiful queen, why are you so heartless?”

The Antlion Whisperer smiled with an embarrassed blush. As a powerful mage himself, he had no interest in taking a mortal as his companion. He thought that only someone as powerful and enchanting as the Lizard Queen was worthy of his stature.

Yes, the Lizard Queen was stronger and younger than him, but in the first place, very few mages were at their level, and he was considered young among those who did. Even fewer were at the Lizard Queen’s level of talent.

So, the Antlion Whisperer figured that as long as he humbled himself to coax the Lizard Queen, he might just be able to win the beauty over.

“I concede that I’m lacking in terms of looks, but shouldn’t a mage be more interested in wisdom and inner beauty? My beautiful queen, if you’re willing to give me a chance, I trust that you’ll find that I’m not as…”

“Shut up!” the Lizard Queen roared. “Who do you think you are?! I don’t need a man!”

She didn’t think there was anyone in this world worthy of her. She believed that she could rise to the top as a mage with her talent.

“Hm?” The Lizard Queen suddenly fell in a daze.

The Antlion Whisperer noticed the Lizard Queen staring in a certain direction, so he reflexively looked over too.

Under the cold moonlight, a beautiful man was galloping along the dunes on a dashing steed. His smooth complexion emanated a faint glow under the moonlight.

“Found it!” Shu Yichao chuckled upon seeing the sand monitors and the antlions. “So these are the red dots on the map! A monster army? I haven’t seen one since the wolf cavalrymen.”

That was a laugh that could dazzle even a nation.

The Lizard Queen, despite her earlier proclamation that she didn’t need a husband, suddenly thought that it wouldn’t be a bad idea to find a man.

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