Chapter 300 – Mute
"Csille? Are you awake now?"
I frowned when I heard someone talk beside me. I couldn't recognize the owner of the voice because my mind was still a little bit foggy since I had just woken up.
I slowly open my eyes and see Brother Pascal sitting beside me.
"Thank goodness you're awake. You passed out after hearing Gisbert's explanation. Are you okay now?"
I passed out? I slowly get up and try to remember what happened.
And it dawns on me. Everything that happened is not a dream. I panicky hold my mouth and try to speak, but no matter how much force I put, I still cannot move it.
I anxiously look at Brother Pascal. Trying to ask for his help, but he just looked at me helplessly.
"You still couldn't speak?"
I shake my head.
What is happening? Why can't I speak? I didn't write about this. Don't tell me I'll be mute for life?
I anxiously shake my head. No! No! I cannot be mute. How can I be the villainess if I will become mute? No! This cannot be happening. I need to do something.
I abruptly stand up, but Brother Pascal tries to stop me. "Csille, what are you doing? Where are you going?"
I look at Brother Pascal and shake my head while struggling to get off from Brother Pascal's hold.
I need to do something! I cannot be mute. No! No! This is not happening to me. No, please, no! How can I return to the real world if Csille becomes mute?
Brother Pascal tries to stop me, but I still try to struggle.
"Csille, what is happening? Why are you struggling? What do you want to do?"
I stop struggling and look at Brother Pascal. I try to gesture to him that I want to find ways how to make me speak again. But Brother Pascal couldn't understand me. He just looks at me with confusion visible in his eyes.
I shake my head in panic. What do I do? How can I explain things to Brother Pascal if he wouldn't understand me?
"Csille, why are you crying? Are you hurting? Tell me if you're in pain. I'm worried about you." Brother Pascal wipes the tears on my cheeks while anxiously looking at me.
I didn't even realize I was already crying. It's probably because I was too frustrated with what is currently happening.
"Csille?"
I shake my head. I try to look for something that will help me communicate with Brother Pascal. My eyes see a paper and a pen on my side table. I immediately take it and start to write on the paper.
'Brother, what is happening to me? Why can't I speak?'
Brother Pascal read what I had written and sighed. "I'm sorry, Csille. I still don't have a clue what is happening to you. It's the first time I have encountered something like this. I'm still asking for help from other Doctors. Don't worry. I will make sure to find a cure."
I felt weak when I heard Brother Pascal. What did he say? He doesn't know what is happening to me? But he's one of the top Doctors in the Vrawyth Kingdom. If he cannot figure out what is happening to me, then who will? Is there really a Doctor who can help me?
I look at Brother Pascal helplessly. "Brother, will I be able to speak again?"
Brother Pascal looked at me with a complicated expression. It's as if he is finding it difficult to answer my question. "Csille, I'm sorry, but I still couldn't answer it for now. But I promise you. I will do everything just to help you get your voice again. I will not let you become a mute."
I put my hands to cover my face and cry. Why is this happening to me? Is it because I am the Villainess that's why they are punishing me? But I haven't done anything wrong. So, I don't understand why.
Brother Pascal tried to comfort me, but I was too focused on my thoughts that I couldn't hear what he was saying.
My eyes widened when I realized something. I look at Brother Pascal before I take the paper and write on it.
'Brother, what happened yesterday? What is that strong wind I experienced?'
"I heard it was a hurricane. Although no one knows where it came from. It just appeared all of a sudden. It was too strong that half of the houses in this town were destroyed. It's a good thing this house is made of sturdy materials, so it wasn't destroyed fully. But we definitely need to have repairs."
A hurricane all of a sudden? It's really it. The fictional world notices the changes, so it's slowly destroying itself.
I should have stuck with the storyline. I should have asked Lilla for help. I should have helped Prince Fraser clear his name. Now it's already too late. It didn't just destroy itself. It also takes away my voice.
The reason why I am mute now is because of the hurricane. If I only do something, then this will not happen.
It's all my fault again. I am the reason why many people lose their houses. Is it also the reason why it takes my voice? As punishment for endangering the people in this world?
"Csille? Is everything okay?"
I look at Brother Pascal. Okay? How can it be okay? The fictional world is starting to notice the changes. How can everything will be okay? If the scenes continue to stray away from the storyline…
We will die. Everyone will die
________________________________
"My dear, what happened to you?" Mother immediately hugs me when she sees me getting off the carriage. I can hear the pain in her cries, and that breaks my heart.
I hurt my parents again. Why do I always do things that hurt the people I love?
After the conversation I had with Brother Pascal this morning, he decided to send me back to the capital. He knows it won't help me if I continue to stay in that place. He also made sure that I was clear of tuberculosis before sending me home.
Brother Pascal, Gisbert, Louisa, and Grandmother Ulla were the only ones left behind. Gisbert will need to finish his two weeks isolation before he can be free. While Brother Pascal still needs to stay there for another two weeks to observe the conditions of Grandmother Ulla and Louisa. So, even if he likes to be with me, he knows I wouldn't like it if he left the two behind.
"Csille…"
I look up and find Father crying while looking at me. Then he hugged Mother and me. "Csille, what happened to my daughter? I shouldn't have let you alone there." He then sobs while hugging us.
I feel my heart broken when I hear both my parents cry because of what happened to me. I want to comfort them. I want to tell them that I am okay and that they don't need to worry. But how can I do that if I can't speak?
I just hug them back and try my best not to cry because I know they will feel broken when they see me crying.
I'm sorry, Mother, Father. It's all my fault. If I only try to do something with the issue. Then this wouldn't probably happen. I'm sorry if I need to put you in pain again. I'm sorry.
The three of us hugged for half an hour before Mother decided to continue talking inside. They directly guide me inside my room.
No one knows that I am mute beside Mother, Father, Brother Pascal, Gisbert, and Louisa. Mother and Father decided to keep it a secret for now because they didn't want to cause a commotion. After all, there is still an issue going on between Prince Fraser and me. If people know what happened to me, I'm sure it will make things more complicated.
Mother holds my hand tightly. "My dear, what happened to you? Why did you suddenly become mute?" Mother cried again while looking at me. "I shouldn't have let you open up that foundation. I should have let you work in our business instead. Look what happened to you. It's all my fault. If I only stop you from opening that Foundation, then this wouldn't happen to you. I'm sorry, my dear."
I shake my head. It's not her fault. If there is someone I should blame here, it should be me. The Virtouse already warned me to follow the storyline strictly, but I was the one who didn't listen. I am the reason why this is happening to me.
I look around. Trying to find a paper and a pen. I find one on my study table. I immediately get it and write the words I want to say to my parents.
''Mother, it's not your fault. So please, don't blame yourself. It was my choice to open up the foundation, and thank you for giving me the chance to do it. I really appreciate it. I never regret even once that I open up a Foundation. I am happy helping people, and if I end up being mute because of it, I still have no regrets. So, please don't be sad anymore. It hurts me seeing you sad because of my condition.'
Mother cries again when she reads what I have written. She holds on tightly to Father's arm. "Dear, what are we going to do now? Our daughter… What will happen to our daughter? She's too young. Why does she need to undergo this thing? She's not even a bad person. I don't understand it. Out of all people, why our daughter?" She then cries again. Her face is already red because of crying.
Father immediately comforts Mother. "My Countess, please stop crying. Your daughter already said it. She is hurting every time she sees us crying. So, don't cry anymore, okay? You're just hurting our child. Also, didn't Pascal already say that he won't stop until he finds a cure for Csille? So, don't worry anymore."
After comforting Mother, Father sat beside me and held my hand too. "Csille, don't worry. We will do anything and everything just to cure you. We promise that. We won't let you live like this for all your life. Even if we need to spend all our fortune to cure you, we will not hesitate to do that."
I look at Mother and Father before I take the paper and write my response.
'Father, Mother, you shouldn't worry about me. Please don't spend our family fortune just to cure my muteness. You have already done a lot of things for me ever since I was born. I couldn't bear to see you sacrifice our whole family. Our ancestors sacrifice their lives so our bloodline will continue. Please don't waste it because of me. If this is really my destiny, then I would accept it.'
I smile reassuringly at them. I know I said it's okay for me to be mute, but I only said that to make them feel better. I know they are really worried about me now, and I don't want to worry them more.
Although I really wish Brother Pascal could help me. But I think it's quite impossible. I think what happened to me is because of trauma. The memory of that day still haunts me every night. I always find myself waking up in the middle of the night and space out for an hour or so.
And psychologists still do not exist in this world. So, even if Brother Pascal spends his whole life researching for the cure, it will be difficult because his focus is more on the physical rather than the psychological aspect.
I don't know if this is because of the trauma or it's because of the force that is trying to control this world. All I know is I'm scared of what will happen next.
Mother cries when she sees what I have written. "My dear, how can we do that? You are our only child. How can we just watch you become a mute all of a sudden? No, we could not let that happen."
I heard Father sigh. "Csille, you don't have to worry. As long as we are here, we will not let you live like this. If we need to find Doctors all over the world, we wouldn't mind. What important is, we can cure you."
I look at Mother and Father. I feel bad that they have to experience this. I'm sorry, Mother and Father. Don't worry. I will also do my best to help you find the cure for my muteness.. I will do anything to return everything to its rightful places.
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