Vaudevillain

“Okay, when you asked if I was afraid of heights this is not what I was expecting,” Dylan said.

He shifted as a squealing voice ran past him, little legs climbing up through foam blocks toward a towering set of stairs. Below said stairs sat a foam pit filled to the brim with bricks of foam the size of Dylan’s head.

Jack had brought them to a trampoline park, or trampoline house, or whatever you called one of these places. At first, Dylan had wondered how heights would play into the date, because the building itself looked like a renovated old mall. All square and brown concrete.

It was only when Jack led him inside that Dylan started to understand. Underneath the exterior lay a colorful wonderland of trampolines, foam, and more kids than Dylan had seen in a long time.

“Come on,” Jack said. “We’re not here for the foam pits.”

“We aren’t?” Dylan asked jokingly as his date grabbed him by the arm.

“No, we’re after a much better prize,” Jack said.

“They meandered past gaggles of excited children toward an—only slightly—more subdued area filled to the brim with trampolines.

“There,” Jack pointed.

Dylan looked to see another tall set of stairs, the words ‘The Plunge’ in electrifying letters running along up the flight. At the end, a line of teenagers and older stood waiting while a man in a polo shirt ushered people forward. Two others would then help the one pulled forward into a sort of stance that reminded Dylan of mummies. Another worker stood at the bottom next to the rather wide pit of foam surrounding the area.

“Pretty cool, right?” Jack asked.

“I honestly don’t know what I’m looking at,” Dylan commented.

“What, you’ve never seen a large trampoline before?” Jack ribbed.

“What’s a trampoline?” Dylan asked, doing his best to look like he’d never heard of the toy before.

Jack rolled her eyes and playfully shoved him. “You dork.”

She led them both toward the stairs as the latest jumper took off. They landed in the trampoline, the mat sinking far below and absorbing most of the force. Dylan had expected the jumper to fly out back toward the top of the stairs. Instead, they only made it a few feet above the trampoline before falling back down.

“Did you think it would be like in those videos?” Jack asked teasingly.

“What videos?” Dylan asked, completely serious this time.

“Wait, you’ve never seen them?” Jack asked. “Not even while doomscrolling?”

“Most of my internet experience is with superheroes and games,” Dylan admitted. “I didn’t spend that much time elsewhere.”

“I guess today’s my lucky day,” Jack said with a smile. “I’ll show you once we’re done here, considering we couldn’t bring our phones in.”

Dylan nodded.

When they eventually made their way up the stairs another worker was there to greet them. They spent a few minutes confirming their ages, that neither had any medical issues, and then explained a few of the rules. Mostly it was all about obeying the workers and not jumping off before being told they could.

Dylan and Jack listened obligingly, then went back to talking.

“So why trampolines?” Dylan asked.

“I figured that since both of us spent so much time in the game, something active would be good,” Jack said. “I went searching for activities, and it was this or indoor skydiving. And then I saw the prices for indoor skydiving.”

Dylan laughed. “Too rich for your blood?”

“You have no idea,” Jack said. “Like, more than a hundred dollars per person.”

Dylan made a face. That was a far cry from the thirty or so they spent on the trampolines.

“Yeah,” Jack laughed. “That was the face I made as well.”

“Alright, next,” the worker said.

Jack turned. “Alright, you ready?”

“As I’ll ever be,” Dylan said.

Jack smiled and pushed him forward. “After this it’s dodgeball. So save your strength.”

The two workers ahead called Dylan over and started getting him ready.

“Okay, make sure you keep this position until you hit the trampoline,” one of them said. “Otherwise you might land on your arm wrong.”

Dylan nodded, a small ball of nervousness forming in his gut. The two workers turned him around so he faced everyone in the line. Jack gave him a reassuring smile.

“Have fun!”

Dylan felt the workers shuffle him to the edge. “Alright, just lean back.”

He did, feeling some hands guide him. Then, he only felt rushing air.

It felt quite a bit like when he flew as Dr. Zlo, Dylan realized. Though it was for a much shorter time than he expected. One moment Dylan was falling, watching the workers wave at him, and then the next he felt springy rubber as he landed.

His stomach made a few flips as he sank into the trampoline, the panicking portion of his mind worried the mat would snap. Then, the trampoline started to push him back up, and Dylan found himself a few feet in the air.

He laughed a bit in relief before trying to right himself and jump again. His feet sank low into the mat before he sprang up again, only about a foot this time. Eventually, all the energy from his fall dissipated, and the worker below helped him out.

Dylan stood to the side, watching as Jack went through the same process. Though when she came back up, her body made a full front flip.

“Wow,” Dylan said as she crawled over to him.

“What, just wow?” She asked. “That was a full front flip.”

“I mean, what else can I say?” Dylan questioned.

Jack nudged him. “Come on, use some of that Dr. Zlo soliloquy on me.”

“I’m pretty sure that’s not the right word,” Dylan said.

“I know,” Jack laughed. “But as someone who works in theater I’m allowed to use words wrong.”

“Oh, is that how it works?”

“That’s how it works,” Jack said with a nod. “Now come on. There’s a dodgeball with your name on it.”

“I think you’ll find it, in fact, has your name on it,” Dylan said, rising to the challenge.

“Hoho! A challenger!” Jack laughed. “Then, prepare for your demise!”

“Impossible,” Dylan answered. “My genius is immortal, and therefore so am I!”

The two fell into laughter as they ran along to the dodgeball section. Dylan lost, but not before he got a few good hits in. He made sure to rub it in as well.

“You only got them by cheating,” Jack said with a laugh. “Crossing the line doesn’t count.”

“I mean, I do play a villain,” Dylan said. “Cheating isn’t above me.”

“It’s like that, is it?” Jack asked with a raised eyebrow.

Dylan nodded assuredly. “It’s like that.”

“Then last one through the obstacle course pays for dinner!” Jack said, instantly rushing off.

“Hey!” Dylan said. He huffed after her, still slightly winded from the dodgeball earlier.

The two dove through plastic hoops and leaped over foam blocks as they jumped from trampoline to trampoline in an attempt to beat each other. Jack eventually won, her sneaky head start proving too much for Dylan. Though in the end, both of them were rather worn out.

“Wow, that’s a lot more tiring than I expected,” Jack said after a minute or so of cooling down.

“I have some sore muscles that I don’t think I’ve ever used before,” Dylan admitted.

“Well, we’ll have plenty of time to wind down until dinner,” Jack said. “You up for a mild walk?”

“Where at?” Dylan asked.

“There’s a park near here,” Jack answered. “We can spend a bit cooling down and then you can treat me to a meal.”

Dylan stood, offering his arm to his date. “I aim to please.”

“What a gentleman,” Jack said.

The two made their way out of the trampoline park, smiles on their faces.

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