Vaudevillain

Sweet Dream directed the Licor-Icks to load the last of the crates when Leatherface walked through the factory doors. His blackened and singed leather coat revealed the signs of battle, and Sweet Dream immediately went over to confirm.

"We got heroes," Leatherface said as the woman reached earshot.

"How many?" Sweet Dream asked.

"There were two. I got one, Fleshgrabber fought the other, but I'm not sure if he won."

Upon hearing those words, Sweet Dream turned to the other villains sitting around. "Alright, pack it up, people! We've got heroes coming!"

The surviving villains scrambled over to jump into the waiting trucks, the Licor-Icks not far behind. Jawbreaker grabbed the last few boxes of candy and heaved them at BB and Sill, who were all waiting inside the final vehicle. Sweet Dream and Leatherface made a beeline for the closest transportation.

"Hold it right there!" a voice yelled.

Sweet Dream whipped her head over to the entrance to see Titan with a group of heroes beside him.

"Surrender, Sweet Dream," the hero said. "You're no match for my team. Come quietly, and you might get a reduced sentence in prison."

Sweet Dream rolled her eyes, "Oh please. We both know you're no match for me." She stomped forward, placing herself between Titan and the trucks. Her group of villains leaned out of the vehicles, brandishing weapons and threatening glares.

"Besides," she continued, "I have my own team. And they aren't about to lose to some ragtag team you threw together at the last second."

Titan pounded his fists together in a show of bravado. "I guess we can't be civilized about this."

"Ha! You were never civil," Sweet Dream taunted. The candy queen of crime shifted into her chocolate form and shouted, "Plan V!"

A group of villains clambered onto the roofs of their pilfered vehicles and charged or pulled out various weapons. Sweet Dream's Licor-Icks swarmed out of the trucks, heading straight for the heroes. Jawbreaker and Sill followed behind, the golden man propping the mermaid up onto his shoulders. Sweet Dream stuck herself to the side of one of the trucks and climbed to the top, meeting Duchess Krampelle and Leatherface.

"Hit it, Bart!" Sweet Dream yelled once she was safely on top of the vehicle. Ahead of her, Bart slammed his foot on the gas and activated his power. A neon ripple of energy raced through Bart's vehicle, and as it traveled, it changed the makeup of the car.

Exhaust pipes sprouted from the hood like weeds, bending around to run along the windows. A blocky engine with flame decals followed, rumbling like an earthquake. The truck's bland white exterior became a flash of red and orange as more flame decals appeared over the frame. The wheels on the vehicle expanded, and spikes poked out of the hubcaps. Finally, the whole truck finished with a black paint job that reminded Sweet Dream of dark caves.

Bart pulled on the cord that sounded the horn, letting the blaring noise deafen all around. The truck ground forward, picking up speed as the massive tires pulled it ahead. Flames flew from the exhaust ports as the vehicle went straight at the waiting heroes.

The entire team of heroes scattered—all except Titan, who turned to meet the oncoming truck head-on. The son of Kratos squared himself, leaning forward like a linebacker. As the truck approached, Titan spread his arms wide and leaned forward.

Man met metal, and the entire truck jerked as Titan pushed against it. But contrary to the hero's belief, the vehicle didn't stop. Despite his strength, Titan was only human. Even if he was heavier than others, it was no match for an eighteen-wheeler barreling at him. Tons of metal smacked Titan, picking him up off the ground for a second before he slid underneath the vehicle.

Bart whooped as the hero slid under the truck. "Didn't you know?" he shouted. "Black is the hardest!"

"Go! Go!" Sweet Dream yelled as Bart made an opening. The rest of the semi-trucks revved their engines, following behind the enhanced vehicle as quickly as they could.

Titan winced as tires rolled over him, and even with his enhanced physical resistance, the blow reduced his health by a quarter. However, Titan kept his cool, waiting for the moment when the back of the truck came into view. When he saw it, Titan grabbed the rear impact guard and pulled. He grunted in exertion as he wrapped his body around the guard, bits of gravel falling away as he settled on the bars.

Sweet Dream's Licor-Icks moved around the trucks, engaging the heroes and keeping the route open. Candy fists flew at the surrounding heroes, their numerical advantage letting them get some hits in. But their blows were like bee stings to the powered individuals, and Licor-icks fell like chaff once the heroes got serious. Sweet Dream and the other villains did their best to help by firing what they had, and a few lucky shots took out the less attentive heroes.

However, the heroes weren't pushovers, and a few shot back, knocking the villains off and in one case taking out a truck completely. Those that could jumped onto Sweet Dream's vehicle, but a third of the villainess's players were left behind.

"Punch it!" Sweet Dream yelled at the Licor-Ick driver. The piece of candy saluted, then stomped on the gas. The truck jerked forward, almost throwing off the players as it sped to catch up to Bart.

"Don't let them get away!" Muerta yelled.

The heroes that could activated flight powers, while others ran to intercept the fleeing trucks, Muerta being one of them. As the vehicle came close, the heroine performed a ballet leap, launching off the ground like a rocket and landing on Sweet Dream's rig.

"Greetings to those who upset the balance of our fair world," Muerta bowed. "I am Muerta, and I shall be your partner for tonight."

Krampelle snorted, "Please. Nothing in this world is fair. If you want something, you have to take it!"

The woman in fur snapped her fingers, calling three shadows to her side.

"Butlers, deal with this person for me, will you?"

The three shadows bowed, then charged as one at Muerta. Leatherface and a few other villains joined in.

"Don't trip over your feet to be my partner, boys," Muerta said. "There's plenty of us to go around."

Two heroes landed next to Muerta, decked out in tech that could only be found at sci-fi conventions. One more climbed up from the back of the truck, a broad ax resting on his back. The three butlers split from the pack to engage the heroes, leaving Leatherface to deal with Muerta.

"Don't blame me when I bash that face in!" the villain shouted.

Leatherface fell into a baseball swing, putting the full force of his body behind his blow as he whipped it at Muerta's torso. The woman danced to the side, waltzing around the strike like it was an unruly guest. She then chacha'd into Leatherface and hip-checked him. The villain stumbled back, unhurt.

Another villain tried to step in, flipping a coin in Muerta's face. It glowed as it left the villain's hand, and the man cackled a taunt.

"I hope you don't mind some loose change!"

Grimacing at the bad joke, Muerta flicked out a fan and batted the coin away. It sailed off the truck, which was now in the factory parking lot, and landed under a small hatchback. An explosion buffeted the players a moment later, resulting from the coin detonating and hitting the car's gas tank.

Muerta slid over to the villain who'd produced the coin and pulled him into a tango. Before he could try anything, Muerta spun him around, right into the third villain's arms. The two collided with a thud, their limbs flailing as both tried to catch themselves.

"Get off me!" the third villain said, pushing the coin villain away. The pushed player rolled on the ground, then off the truck entirely.

"You fuuu–!" the players heard as he fell.

Things were silent for a moment, then Muerta brought a fan up to her mouth and tittered, "More like chump change."

Leatherface groaned.

Over on Bart's truck, Titan had finally pulled himself into something of a sitting position. The car still sped through the parking lot and was fast reaching the street ahead. Titan braced himself, waiting for the moment the truck would slow. Bart pulled left on the steering wheel, hitting the brakes at the perfect time and swinging his vehicle into the street. Cars honked in alarm and anger as they all slammed on the brakes to allow the truck through. Sweet Dream's truck followed behind, but not as fast since the Licor-Ick didn't have Bart's skill.

As the truck swung around, Titan stood and grabbed at the handle on the loading door. Using the handle as leverage, the player hoisted himself up until he could reach the vehicle's top with his other hand. He shoved his fingers into the corner once he reached the top, creating a handhold by denting the metal exterior. From there, Titan pulled himself onto the roof.

Sweet Dream saw all of this, and once Titan started moving, she commanded her truck to pull alongside Bart. The Licor-Ick complied, its red licorice face twisting into a frown of concentration. The vehicle drove to sit side by side, barely enough room between them to fit a bicycle. Sweet Dream leaped over the gap once she could, landing directly in front of Titan as he pulled himself up.

"Time for round two," Sweet Dream said.

Titan readied his fists, "You won't get away so easily this time."

One of the two tech heroes landed next to Titan, "Let me help!"

Sweet Dream immediately blasted him with a glob of chocolate. The hero jumped to dodge out of the way, but that only put him in range of Leatherface. The villain shot a coil of leather, where it wrapped around the hero's torso. Leatherface yanked on the rope, pulling the hero toward an incoming sign.

The ringing of metal on metal echoed across the streets, and Leatherface smirked as the hero peeled off the sign like an old sticker. The attack had cost one of his leather ropes, but the numbers had evened up again.

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