127 I care about you

When Penelope arrived at Azriel’s castle, the Commander General was at the gates to welcome her. He stood there as the chariot rode in; hands clasped behind his back, dressed in his casual wear, aqua ombre hair being tossed by the wind, and the crooked smile dancing on his lips, he was the image of a heartbreaker.

She got down from the chariot, refusing the hand he held out to her to help her down. Confused, Azriel followed her as she walked hastily towards the castle.

“What is wrong? Did something happen between you and Neera?” He asked.

“Nothing happened, my Lord. I have work to get back to,” Penelope said, her steps still racing.

Azriel held her hand to stop her. When he turned her face at him, he didn’t miss the dried tear stains on her face.

All his alarms went up. “What happened?”

“You”, she sounded angry. “You happened, my Lord. You keep me away from my best friend! You should have told me she was kidnapped! You kept everything from me...”

The tears started again. Azriel pulled her to himself, and she pushed him away in protest, but he kept his hold on her firm. She struggled against his arms but Azriel’s large build held her still. Giving up, she let him hug her.

When Azriel saw she was finally calm, he spoke;

.....

“I didn’t tell you anything because you couldn’t have done anything to help her when she was kidnapped, the only thing you would have done was to worry and panic and most likely go search the streets day and night for her, and I needed you to heal”, Azriel’s voice poured into her ear.

“I care about you, Penelope, a little too much maybe, so I won’t apologize for not telling you”, he broke the hug, his green eyes boring into her blue ones.

Penelope wiped at her nose and tried to hold in her sniffles. Azriel used a finger to push the wet strands of hair away from her forehead behind her ear.

She had been gone for two days and life in his castle was boring. Not that he and Penelope did any activities together, but mere seeing her, either working or in passing, gave him some weird kind of ease he had learned to appreciate more when she was gone.

Azriel’s eyes roamed her face like she was his favorite book to read in his pastime. Penelope could feel her heart beat increase, and her head went blank, as if her brain disappeared. Do demons have the ability to make brains disappear?

“I missed you”, Azriel whispered, and Penelope’s voice hitched in her throat. What was she supposed to say to that? There was no intellectual function coming forth.

The sound of feet shuffling brought back her brain from wherever realm is was pulled to. At once, she pushed herself away from him, and Azriel smiled at how red her face had turned. The servant who had interrupted them, bowed to Azriel as he pulled the reins of the horses, taking them back to the stable.

“I....my Lord”, she cleared her throat. “I have to go work...”

“No”, Azriel cut her off. “What you have to go and do is go into your chambers, rest, and a maid will bring you food.”

The finality of his tone made Penelope not argue with him. And besides, he was still her Lord, and there was still a line she could not cross. She bowed her head in obedience and moved towards her chambers.

“Pen?” Azriel called to her. She looked back and caught his smile.

“It is good to have you back.” He said.

Penelope hurried away, and she felt her cheeks grow warmer than the sun.

...

After Neera had moved back into the room, she was afraid to sleep on her own on the first night. Shadows seemed to dance on the walls and any noise made her draw her bed covers tighter around herself. True to Zavian’s words, he had let her be, and she knew if she had gone into his room to sleep, he would have allowed her in without question.

But she had to do what she had to do, if she kept sleeping with him, she might one day indeed sleep with him. Besides, she wouldn’t sleep on his bed when the queen was chosen, so she had to help herself.

She tried the first night to sleep alone, lighting so many candles, it almost looked like daytime in the room and nothing happened, no nightmares or odd occurrences so, she became courageous the next night, and then the next, until she slept three nights in a row without Zavian by her side.

Apart from the occasional waking up during the night, she was still adjusting to the fact that Zavian was no longer by her side. Sometimes, she would reach her hand out to the other side of the bed and would be met by emptiness. Her heart would ache at that, and her legs would itch to walk over to his door and knock.

On the fifth day, Neera celebrated a win of the probable end of her nightmares and the peace that came with it, but at the same time, mourning the loss of having Zavian next to her.

There was a knock on her door, Neera turned to it; the maid must have come to bring breakfast, but wasn’t it a bit too early?

“Come in,” Neera called.

However, when the door opened, it wasn’t any maid but the King himself. Neera was at her feet at once.

“Your Majesty.” She greeted, surprised.

Zavian sighed. “I guess hearing you call me Zavian was only going to be a two-time affair, is it?”

He could see the way she avoided eye contact with him and wrung her hands at that comment. Her eyes went beyond him to the door, a tell-tale sign of her discomfort, as if she wanted to run out. That was exactly what he didn’t want to happen; he could feel her pulling away, and he was grasping at the bits of what was once between them. If there was any.

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