This Girl Wins Three Hundred Million Dollars
Chapter 147: The Buddha is Enchanted
Chapter 147
That evening, Shen Youlin couldn't sleep and tossed and turned in bed.
Yu Shu sighed, wrapping her arms around his waist to hold him still, and coaxed softly, "Can't sleep? How about some pre-bedtime exercise?"
Shen Youlin adamantly refused, "Can't you have some higher-level pursuits? Be someone detached from lowly pleasures?"
Yu Shu let go of him and kicked him, "Fine, I'll remember that. The next time you want to, I'll use that line on you."
What happens tomorrow will happen tomorrow. Today, let's indulge.
Shen Youlin twirled Yu Shu's hair with his fingers, "Sweetheart, if something were to happen to me one day, would you die of sorrow?"
"No." Yu Shu told the truth, "I'd become a lonely and sad wealthy widow, using extravagant spending to soothe my sorrows."
"Hmph, can't you even lie to me?"
Yu Shu said helplessly, "But you wanted the truth, right? You're very important to me, but my life isn't just about you and love. If such a tragedy were to occur, I'd be heartbroken for a long time, probably drifting aimlessly for years. But eventually, I'd get on with the rest of my life."
"Would you find someone else then?"
"I can't say for sure. If time healed the pain and the right person came along, I might remarry."
"Hmph!"
Shen Youlin flicked her hair away, dissatisfied. That "hmph" carried immense resentment, more forceful than usual.
Yu Shu comforted him, "Or maybe not. Since I'd be so rich, I could get a fresh young stud every month. Why bother remarrying?"
Shen Youlin pouted silently.
Yu Shu kissed him on the lips, "Don't dwell on those 'what ifs'. They're meaningless. What matters is that you're here with me."
"Hmph, if I hadn't met you, you'd have become a pirate queen, wouldn't you?"
"Mind your words. Say 'queen', not 'pirate'."
Yu Shu didn't deny it. Becoming a wealthy pirate queen had always been her dream. Unfortunately, before she could set sail, she found a ferocious tiger at home, and her dream was strangled in its cradle.
"But this is better, actually," Shen Youlin said calmly. "Back on Saipan, you said you liked me, but not to the extent of liking only me and being unable to live without me. I was upset then. I wished you'd like me more, and more, to the point where you couldn't be without me."
"But that would make you unhappy, wouldn't it? You'd live in constant fear, always worried about losing me, and you wouldn't be yourself anymore."
Yu Shu patted him reassuringly, "Our little Shen is being melancholy again tonight. You're overthinking it. Don't compare us to other couples. We're unique. Don't project. We'll be together for the rest of our lives, believe me."
Shen Youlin chuckled, "You sound so certain, I almost suspect you can see the future."
Yu Shu cleared her throat, "Don't suspect. I actually can."
"I don't believe you."
Yu Shu raised her eyebrows, "We'll have a daughter who looks like me but has your dramatic flair. And further down the line, we'll have twin grandchildren."
"Really?" Shen Youlin pondered, "Then let's get to it. I want to hold my grandkids soon."
With that, Shen Youlin pounced on Yu Shu like a hungry tiger, pinning her beneath him. Yu Shu protested, shoving him, "Can't you have some higher-level pursuits? Be someone detached from lowly pleasures?"
"No, I want to indulge in lowly pleasures! Let's play 'rape', baby~~"
"Get off! No way!"
"Hehehe, good thing you said no. If you agreed, it wouldn't be rape!"
Shen Youlin chuckled lewdly as he groped Yu Shu, tickling her until she rolled around laughing.
...
The next day, Yu Shu gave Shen Youlin an outrageously bad idea. The worst idea ever.
As soon as Shen Youlin heard it, his eyes lit up, beaming like lasers. He immediately called to have some instruments brought up the mountain.
The instruments didn't arrive until noon. Shen Youlin figured Shen Youfei would be napping, so he boldly grabbed a guitar and headed out.
Yu Shu waved her handkerchief with mock tears, "Dearest, I'll be waiting for your triumphant return~"
Shen Youlin scoffed arrogantly, "Why don't you join me on the battlefield if you can?"
"I can't." Yu Shu pretended to dab her eyes with the handkerchief. "Let me suffer this ordeal alone."
"Hmph!"
At the compound wall, Shen Youlin found a spot close to Shen Youfei's window, set up a chair, and sat down. The afternoon sun was scorching, so he had someone hold up a parasol and place a small table with Yu Shu's lovingly brewed fruit tea. After putting on a cool pair of shades, he was all set. He leisurely tuned his guitar.
Two young nuns peeked around the corner. Even at his worst, Shen Youlin was devilishly handsome. Holding a guitar only amplified his "charisma buff", enough to tempt even the pious.
Shen Youlin cleared his throat and began strumming, "Hey~Jude~"
He coughed, having botched the tune, and started again, "Hey~pig~ your nose has two~ holes~" fππ²ππ°eπ―nπΌvπ²π.πoπ¦
The nuns instantly turned to stone and cracked apart.
"When you have a cold, your snot hangs~ ohh ohh~"
"Pig, your eyes are jet black~ gaze and gaze but can't see the end~~~"
The nuns covered their ears and ran away swiftly. This singing voice would make the King of Hell put down his Book of Life and Death, make the Goddess NΓΌwa stop mending the sky, and make the Jade Emperor cease refining his pills...
Not only was he singing off-key, but the guitar and vocals were out of sync.
"Missing you at night~~ reminiscing about mother's words~ shimmering teardrops like dew~"
Jiang Han climbed the wall, tossed a lump of dried dog poop at him (missing), flipped him the bird, and left.
The bodyguards cleared the poop. Shen Youlin continued, "The girl across the way has looked~ look over, look over~~ the show here is quite a spectacle~ don't pretend~ to ignore it~~"
Inside the cottage, Shen Youfei gripped her teacup so hard her fingertips turned white, a vein pulsing at her temple.
Shen Youlin sang for a while until his throat was parched. He downed two big cups of fruit tea. "Can't you hear me? Get me a microphone, and speakers too. No, wait, get me a broadcasting station setup with speakers installed all over the temple grounds!"
Just as he finished speaking, Shen Youfei stormed out with a stern face.
Shen Youlin tossed aside his guitar and ran towards her with open arms, "Sister~~"
Shen Youfei slapped him hard, "I don't have such a worthless brother!"
That singing voice accompanied by the guitar was devastatingly powerful. Even the Buddha would be driven to demonic madness by such torment!
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