Chapter 185

“No.”

“Really… why would you….” She was lost. She forgot what she was thinking of asking him. Oh right, Barden.

“Why do you hate Barden so much?” she asked.

“I don’t hate him.” I want to kill him, thought Alexcent but didn’t say it aloud. He didn’t particularly hate Barden, but he did want him gone from their lives.

“Then why are you particularly mean to Barden?” asked Amethyst, “If you don’t hate him, did you casually decide to kill him just for fun?”

“I wonder why.” Alexcent clamped his mouth shut after that and refused to respond.

Amethyst was frustrated that he was acting this way. If he doesn’t hate him, then why…. Amethyst, in her annoyance, put a bit more pressure on the gauze accidentally when covering the wound.

“Ugh.” Alexcent frowned but Amethyst focused on his wound.

“Why do you care so much about Barden?” he asked. Amethyst hands working busily covering his cut, stopped. She looked up at him, confused.

“I don’t,” she said.

“Don’t lie,” said Alexcent. He grabbed her waist and laid her on the bed.

“Alec…”

“Don’t lie to me,” he said roughly. “You….” His eyes burned with frustration. Do I really have to say it out loud? Alexcent scowled. He wasn’t able to understand why he wasn’t able to say it out loud. Why was it so difficult? He was unable to look her in the eye. He thought that if he did, she would know and she would leave him. She would choose Barden over him.

“Alec….” Amethyst didn’t know what was going on in his mind. He called out his name cautiously. She saw that his wound was bleeding again.

“Move aside!” she exclaimed and straightened her dress. She pressed the gauze down on his and to stop the bleeding. “You are so careless. Don’t move!”

There was a knock at the door. It was the doctor. Amethyst was relieved. As the doctor treated his wound, she stayed by his side.

“Thankfully, it wasn’t very deep,” said the doctor, “As long as you are careful, it will heal quickly.”

“That’s a relief,” said Amethyst.

“See, I told you it’s fine.”

“Don’t,” said Amethyst sternly, “You just keep quiet.”

The doctor awkwardly finished his work. “Then, I will be heading back.”

“Yes, thank you so much,” said Amethyst.

After the treatment was over, the doctor left. Amethyst and Alexcent were alone in the room. She turned to him fiercely, but Alexcent turned away from her. She couldn’t understand why he was acting this way. Amethyst was being very careful these days because there seemed to be this unknown issue between them. But she was becoming frustrated as Alexcent continued to act cold towards her.

She had many things that she had hidden from him, so she couldn’t really criticize him when she herself was unable to tell him everything honestly. She approached him carefully. She wrapped her arms around him taking care to not touch his injured arm.

“Please, take care of yourself,” she said, “Don’t get hurt.” He didn’t respond to that. “It upsets and worries me when you get hurt.”

Alexcent wrapped his uninjured arm around her. “Alright. I am sorry.”

If you get hurt or anything goes wrong, I always feel like somehow, it’s my fault. It scares me. Amethyst was unable to voice out her thoughts. They stayed in each other’s arms in silence for a while.

***

“How does your arm feel now?” asked Gen

“It’s feels okay,” said Alexcent.

“What do you intend to do now?”

“About?”

“Barden…”

“Nothing for now.”

Alexcent handed out signed documents that had needed his approval to Gen. She gets so sad with such a small injury on me, thought Alexcent, I wonder what might happen to her if something were to happen to Barden.

The thought of her being in agony was unbearable to Alexcent. In the end, he could only do what would make her happy.

After that day, Alexcent was changed. He was cautious with his actions and behavior. He felt disconnected and distant. He continued to seek her in bed but nothing beyond that. Amethyst assumed it was because their contract was going to end soon so he was distancing himself from her. She made sure to not cross any line herself as well. The invisible wall began building up between the two.

***

Amethyst, who just finished her swords practice, did not immediately return to her room today, instead she took the longer route. Walking along the forest path behind the training ground, she enjoyed the stroll in the gentle wind which distracted her from her painful thoughts.

The forest path soon led to a trail. She stopped at a tree and sat down, closing her eyes and leaning against the trunk to rest a bit. She listened to the rush of the win and the rustle of the leaves. The chirping of the birds made her feel at peace. She could hear the knights training on the ground. She loved the smell of the grass.

Everything felt tranquil but her heart was still disturbed. She felt incomplete. “I thought I was the only one who knew about this secret place.”

Amethyst opened her eyes at the voice to see Barden. “Barden?”

“Hello.”

Due to the sun, she could only make out his silhouette. “I didn’t know this was a secret place.”

“Haha, I was just joking. There really isn’t a place like this where you feel so at peace.”

“I think you’re right.”

Barden offered her a small package. “Would you like to try some?”

“What is it?”

“It’s cookies.”

She opened the package to try some.

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