My eyes fluttered open, with a stabbing pain in my stomach. I groaned, clutching my stomach as I slowly looked around myself with blurry eyes. Where… was I?
The snow still howled outside with crackling fury, and somehow it felt stronger than it had before. My eyes drifted and I found a woman clad in icy robes with haunting blue eyes nearby. For a moment, I panicked, those eyes plunging a deep rooted fear that only came from being left alive inches from death. I tried to get up and move, but found my wounds bursting open, blood leaking through, I coughed, even more blood pooling in my mouth.
“Please do not move, Divine one. Your vessel is injured,” she said, moving closer as she put her hand on my gut. It was ice cold, and the sensation soothed the burning pain of my wounds as the woman’s Qi flowed in and sealed the wound shut.
No… not Qi. Chi? It felt similar to Chi, but not quite the same either. But I didn’t have the mental capacity to ponder over those thoughts, I could feel the high fever I had, my body struggling to fight against the assassin’s poison. I looked up at the woman and gathered enough strength to speak.
“Who… are you?” I asked.
The woman turned to look at me, giving me an unblinking gaze, the kind that Liuxiang often gave me, carrying within it an inhuman quality of something pretending to be human but not truly there yet. It sent a shiver down my spine.
“Do you not remember us, Divine One?” she asked, looking at me with far greater worry at my supposed memory loss.
She had been calling me that. Divine One. What did that even mean? And if she was misunderstanding who I was… did I want to correct her?
Thinking felt difficult, yet I needed to think, and I needed to find a way back. From the looks of it she wasn’t immediately hostile, but she looked more and more like a spirit the more I saw her. And I wasn’t sure what to expect from her. Spirits were tricky, they had their own rules that they followed, and this one’s could be ‘kill anybody who’s not the Divine One. I didn’t find myself in the mood to test that.
“My memory is a little… shaky. What’s… your name? Maybe I’ll remember it then,” I asked.The spirit looked at me, before giving a small nod. “My name is Bai Jing. A spirit of winter. I’m here to seek your help, Divine One,” the spirit said, bowing her head.
“Well, as you can see. I’m not in very good shape to be helping right now,” I replied, trying to smile but the pain pulled my smile into a grimace as I held my wounds.
“Yes. That is a problem. It is unfortunate to see the Divine One reliant on such a weak vessel, perhaps I can help you procure a new one?” the spirit said.
It took me a minute to realize that the vessel she was talking about was me, and a few more seconds before I realized who exactly she might be referring to when she said Divine One.
“No, no new vessel please,” I said, holding my wound as I pulled myself upright with effort.
“Then it will be difficult. This vessel is injured and poisoned, and my sister has lost herself in rage. It would be a most arduous task to try and heal it sufficiently, and I am not well versed in the healing arts,” Bai Jing replied.
“It’s fine,” I said, trying to grab the pouch at my waist. From inside, I took out the little doll made of refined clay, in my own image. This was far from done yet but dire circumstances called for desperate methods. I closed my eyes, and put pieces of my own spirit into the doll. Rapidly, the clay shifted, soaking in my Chi as pathways began to form around it. My own spirit wrapped around the dolls, changing its muddy color as it began to look more and more like me. My robes formed around the doll, color seeping into it as pathways formed inside the little thing, forming a small core that contained a slice of my own Chi.
I lay back down, exhausted from that small exertion but the doll stood up on its own feet now, standing ready to work.
“He can… tell you what to get… Just bring me enough… and I’ll make something to heal myself…” I said, starting to feel my head go dizzy as I began to lose consciousness. The spirit looked curiously at my doll, but mini me simply pat his chest, before guiding the spirit.
“As you wish, Divine One,” the spirit said, bowing her head to me as she stood up.
I no longer had the strength to speak, so I simply closed my eyes, trusting the two of them to get the job done. If not, then this cave would have to serve as my grave.
***
The next time I opened my eyes, I felt warmth next to me. A fire was burning nearby, keeping some of the chilling cold at bay. A blanket covered my body and torn rags had been tied into makeshift bandages to cover my wounds. I pulled myself up, slowly this time to not open my wounds as I looked around. A cauldron was seated nearby- no, not a cauldron, a large pot for soup. But I could tell that it had been used for alchemy with the scent of the spirit herbs coming from it.
I looked around myself in surprise. Had someone found me all the way out here? Who?
A moment later, the spirit walked inside the cave, and beside her was mini me, carrying a giant stack of firewood above his head like he wasn’t lifting five times his own bodyweight. The spirit saw me awake and walked closer before crouching next to me as she put a hand on my forehead. The chill from her body had not reduced, but somehow it still felt nice against my warm body. “Your fever has gone down,” she said.
“Who did all this?” I asked. I’d thought I would need to manage it all on my own, but the only thing I remembered was passing out in a daze.
“The spirit doll. It managed to guide me to herbs while I protected it from my sister’s wrath. We found some human homes that were abandoned and found the food and other things from there,” Bai Jing said.
The doll patted its chest, puffing it out in pride. I looked at it, before gently touching the doll’s head. “Thanks, for saving me. Though I guess you’re still me, huh?” I said, and the doll nodded, walking closer to me before it held out a fist. I watched it in surprise before I bumped my own fist against the doll’s, and I smiled. The doll gave me a thumbs up.
“Hah, you really are me,” I said, amused.
But there was not much time to linger on that fact yet, I looked to the spirit soon after who sat, continuing to watch me with an unblinking gaze. “I wish to ask you something, human.”
I winced. Guess the jig was up. I watched the spirit, wondering if she was going to turn hostile, but she continued to simply regard me with curiosity. “I had thought the Divine One had returned to us after so long. I had sensed his presence within you, and heard his voice come from your mouth. There was no mistaking it. I can still sense it, the lingering effects of our Lord’s spirit within you. Yet, he is not here. You hold the Divine One within you somehow,” the spirit said in her usual monotone. But her next words were ice, spoken with the malice of a thousand winters. “Do you hold him prisoner, like the woman who stole my sister from me?”
I looked at the spirit and saw her wrath. It was cold, and calm, yet it would have no mercy if I misspoke. “No, Xuanwu is… I’m not sure what to call him. We’re not friends, but he’s helped me and saved my life many times. I owe him.”
The spirit’s wrath faded away instantly, confusion replacing her expression again. “Friends? You consider yourself someone capable of being a friend to the Divine One?” she said the words in disbelief, like she was looking at a mad man.
“Well, it would be nice if we could get there,” I replied, trying to shrug before I remembered my injuries and settled for a half gesture instead.
“You are peculiar. Very peculiar. In the first place, it is hard to believe someone of your caliber could ever hold the Divine One. Even if weakened greatly. Only the great demon could, and I have checked. You are not him.”
“The great demon?” I asked.
“Yes. He took our lands, and our homes. He called death and twisted it till it morphed into something else entirely. The lord had to leave, and we have been awaiting his return since,” the spirit said, glancing outside, before her eyes went back to me. “Are you the one, who he has chosen?”
“Uhh…” I trailed off, not sure how to reply to any of it.
“You did not answer me, human,” Bai Jing said.
“I… guess? He did choose me, he said. As a suitable even if weak vessel. To mend the cycle and everything, as the spirit of the divine tree,” I replied. “So if that’s what you mean, then yes?”
This time, it was the spirit’s turn to look at me in confusion. “The divine tree? The tree was lost a long time ago. And the spirit has not been seen since. The Divine One is not the-“ a sharp gust of icy wind flowed inside from the entrance of the cave, nearly blowing out the fire. “My sister’s rage grows. We do not have time.”
“What do you mean?” I asked.
“The woman the Divine One killed had captured my sister. And though she had her vengeance, my sister has… lost her senses. She has returned to her base nature, as Li Xue. As the winter storm. Only the presence of the Divine One can calm her back to her senses. Otherwise this storm will never stop.”
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I frowned at the spirit’s words, trying to think of something, but she put her hand on my chest, pushing me back down. “I sense confusion in you, and I do not know their answers. But I know the Divine One resides within your soul. Seek him and ask for his help. Tell him Bai Jing begs him to return. He will answer,” she spoke, as a blue glow lit up on her hand.
Before I could protest, a coldness seeped into my body as I felt my muscles lose all tension, before the darkness took hold of me again.
***
I opened my eyes in the darkness of my own spirit. I couldn’t say it was fun to be sent here against my will, but I also had very little strength to resist as I was right now, and if Bai Jing was right, I did not have much time either.
If this snow storm continued, I would most certainly die here, and the rest of our caravan would not be able to proceed. And from the sound of it, there were a lot of things Xuanwu was not telling me about. I had already known of this, and the fact that he was hiding something from me, but I had simply been waiting for him to speak up on his own terms. Circumstances no longer left that as an option.
I stepped across the darkness and moved rapidly. The tree was not far this time, and it did not take me long to find my way here. The divine tree remained just in front of me, and I could sense Xuanwu’s spirit residing inside it. I walked up the tree and looked up at the spirit.
“Hey,” I said, raising my hand as if greeting a friend. The spirit didn’t reply.
“Well, you already know why I’m here,” I said. The spirit continued to remain silent.
I frowned, starting to feel a little annoyed. “I’m starting to pull together some pieces on my own here. The Divine Beasts, the Azure Dragon at the heart of the empire. I know this much. It’s how the name of the empire and its entire history came to be. And you had spoken of a black dragon, the Dragon of Death, and called yourself the Spirit of the Cycle instead. That would make for three Divine Beasts, you, the Azure Dragon, and the Black Dragon. But then… What's this about the Divine One of these winter spirits? They belong to the north?” I asked, walking closer as I began to push. “What have you been hiding from me?”
The spirit still did not reply, remaining hidden.
“I didn’t take you to be a coward who would hide even at the cost of the lives of others,” I said, feeling disappointment fill my heart.
That… got a response.
“You do not understand, child. You understand nothing,” Xianwu said at last, manifesting in front of me. For the first time, I saw the spirit’s entire body. A giant black turtle stood in front of me, with a snakecoiled around its body, hissing as the world shook within my spirit.
“So that’s what you are,” I said, looking up at the spirit. “Not very tree-like, I must admit.”
Xuanwu shivered as he looked down at me, closing in with his massive face. The serpent on his back leaned in closer, tongue flicking as its pupils dilated, focusing on my. I could feel myself freeze under its gaze, even within my own spirit.
“You wish to know the truth?” the spirit asked, anger reflecting in his voice.
“I do. I want to know what’s happening. Who really are you?” I asked, looking up at the giant spirit.
Xuanwu pulled back, pausing for a moment. The serpent on the back hissed once more. A rumble shook the spirit realm, as the turtle looked down at me alongside the serpent on his back. “Hear the truth then.”
I nodded my head, as the giant turtle began.
“In the ages bygone, lost to history, this land had been far greater than it is now. Immortality was not given to a few chosen, but all who wished to walk upon their path and carve their names into the world.
“This was the era where the four Divine Beasts had roamed this land. We ruled the north, Qinglong, the Azure Dragon, divine beast of spring and wood, ruled the east, of what is now the Azure-Jade empire. Zhu Que, the Vermillion Bird, divine beast of fire and south, ruled the southern lands. And Baihu, the White Tiger, divine beast of metal ruled the western lands.”
The spirit realms shook, as I saw the silhouette of the four divine beasts, all grand, as large as Xuanwu himself, with a command over one of the five elements.
“But there was one more. Qilin. Or Ki, as you know her. She was… the keeper of the earth. The earth spirit, as you know her. She claimed no land and did not rule any. A free spirit. One of our siblings, but also not one of us. She was… at the time, we thought of her as lesser. Like a younger sibling we had to look after.”
“What happened then? To the other beasts?”
“War. We began to fight one another, as an argument began to form. At the time, we each had vessels we had chosen, to serve as emperors of the mortals, to guide humans onto divinity and immortality. But one day, a fight began amongst them. A question that one had asked. Why must one give up on themselves, to achieve immortality?”
I saw a vision of emperors sitting around in courts, arguing with one another, as they held the power of the divine beasts.
“What does that mean?” I asked.
“In the path of Qi, and under the will of heaven, do you know the last step to immortality?”
I frowned, trying to remember. I had studied this somewhere, a long time ago. As I thought over the words, the answer came. “Core shattering?” I asked, looking up at Xuanwu.
“Indeed. Though the name has been mistranslated. The true meaning of the realm is To-Become-One-With-The-World. And to do so, to become immortal, one must give up their mortal bodies and selves. Abandon their transient nature and ascend as a spirit, escaping the cycle of eternal birth and rebirths. But the emperors, in their greed, wanted more. They wished to cling onto the realms, to their physiques and the world. They wanted… to sever death away.”
I saw a figure standing in front of a giant tree, at the heart of it, a unified cycle of great light, holding the souls of the dead. And I saw him reach his hand in and shatter it.
“Thus, the cycle was broken. Death was separated from life. And when the children of heaven and earth separated, the heavenly beasts split as well. The Azure Dragon and Vermillion Bird chose Heaven, and life. The White Tiger and we chose the Earth, and death.”
I saw endless armies of cultivators clashing, as the giant beasts fought in the background, shaking the world to its very roots.
“A war waged between the two, a great war that shook the very world. The Azure Dragon won. The Vermilion Bird was injured and retreated to rest. The White Tiger and we retreated back to our own lands as well. The land was turned red with blood, countless dead, and countless more injured. That… was how this empire was born.”
I saw the sights for myself, a gruesome visage that chilled me to my bone.
“But the spirit of earth, the Qilin chose neither. She watched, with great sorrow, as her siblings fought one another, and the cycle of life and death broke, killing the Tree of Unity. Souls wandered the realms, lost and without a place to go to. At the time, we did not understand the price of our actions.”
I saw the Qilin, watching over the empire, as the tree began to wither away.
“From those millions of death, the souls that had perished, sought rest. Sought rebirth. But they found none. And so they roamed the land, plaguing it with sickness, as the dead began to rise. The emperor of the newfound empire grew worried, and decided to seal away death beneath the earth, to stop the dead from rising. But that only delayed the inevitable.
Death continued to fester, rising beneath the earth as it bubbled and boiled forth. And from within that death with no solace, the deathless were born.”
A shiver went down my spine as the image of the deathless appeared in my mind.
“We… regretted our actions. And when the Qilin weakened so much she could no longer exist outside the tree, we took it upon ourselves to fix the cycle. And for that, we drew upon the tree’s power, to call souls from beyond. Souls untainted by this world, that we could mold. And of those, we chose Shen Yuan. But it was not to be.”
My eyes widened in surprise as I heard the words. So… he was the same as me then. Someone from earth. I looked up at the spirit. “How did… Shen Yuan become a demon?”
“We told him the truth. We raised him to be a vessel again, to unite life and death and to bring Qinglong back to his senses. To fix this broken empire. He followed the same technique you had, but while one half of him accepted, the other refused. The two fought, and of the two, Yang Shen won. Thus, the demon was born.”
“He tried to claim our spirit, but he was far too weak. But… we had grown attached and let him live, to repent his actions. That had been our mistake. He fooled the White Tiger, obtaining his powers instead, before going after the Vermilion Bird. Death ran rampant now, and Yang Shen had mastered its ways. She fled to the western lands, but Shen Yuan followed, finding and capturing her, before claiming her powers,” Xuanwu said, pain evident in his voice as he spoke the words.
Thus, the fire demon of the west was born.”
“And after that you found me?”
“No. We tried to convince Shen Yuan, but he would not listen. We then used force, but he could match us now, with the power of two Divine Beasts… we were forced to give in. He returned to the continent afterwards and has since then been leading the demons to try and obtain his hands on the Azure Dragon. This was when… we first noticed you.”
“Back when I figured out the cultivation of heaven and earth?” I asked.
“Indeed. Qilin noticed you before us. A seed had already formed, of a new tree of unity. You… were weak. We did not think you would be able to ever fight Yang Shen. But we took a chance. There was no one else who had ventured on this path on their own.”
I chewed over the words, thinking over them before I let out a long breath. This was a lot to take in all at once.
“So now he’s going after the Azure Dragon, and then you, and… Qilin? But why?” I asked.
“We don’t know. But we know that if he is not stopped, the cycle can never be repaired. In his purpose, Yang Shen has strengthened the demons, gaining aid from the deathless. Using that death, he has forged himself into afalse divine beast in the image of the Azure Dragon. The Black Dragon. And with that strength, he plans to take the Azure Dragon for himself. The only one of the four divine beasts, whose lands have not yet fallen to the rot of the broken cycle, and the demons. The only one who stands a chance to stop him.”
The spirit’s words resonated through the world around me. I closed my eyes, simply thinking for a few moments.
“And… my job is to stop him?” I asked Xuanwu.
“We have not asked you to do such. The choice… ultimately, we have left it in your hands.”
“That’s awfully trusting of you,” I said, raising an eyebrow.
“Trust is not what drives us. It is a necessity. But perhaps we do trust you, somewhat.”
“Clearly not enough to not lie to me about your identity,” I said, snorting.
“We… apologize. We had feared that if you found the truth about Yang Shen… you too would choose the path he picked.”
“And what? Kill thousands of people and become a demon? Wow, you really think very little of me, don’t you?” I said.
Xuanwu did not seem to catch my tone, simply grunting as the spirit world shook around me.
“So, the Qilin’s spirit is inside Twilight then?” I asked.
“She holds her remnant. A seed. Much like the tree you carry. It could blossom into something new, but only time can tell that.”
“Okay,” I said, closing my eyes.
“Well. This is all good to know. Thanks for telling me,” I said, reaching out my hand as I trusted the giant turtle. “And thanks for trusting me.”
Xuanwu grunted once more. I was starting to think the turtle just did not know how to deal with affection.
“I’ll need your help with this winter spirit. Do you think you can help me?”
“Not as you currently are. Manifesting in you as a vessel breaks you a little every time we do it. You must craft your twin and share the burden to be able to carry us in any meaningful way.”
I nodded my head.
“Guess what I need to do hasn’t really changed at all,” I said, smiling through the thousand things still swirling in my mind. The divine beasts, and the history of the empire. The… truth, that I had learned today.
I did not know how that would affect me. But my path was ultimately still the same.
“It hasn’t. You walk your own path, Lu Jie,” Xuanwu said.
“Yeah. And I appreciate you helping me walk through it,” I replied, looking up at the giant spirit.
For a briefest moment, I felt like he smiled, but I couldn’t tell through the darkness and with his massive size.
“Return for now. We will await the time you can call upon us fully,” Xuanwu said, and I nodded, feeling the spirit realm shiver around me.
After a moment of hesitation, I closed my eyes, and then, with a leap of reality, I was back in my own body.
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