If she was really an immortal like what Alexei said, how long had she lived? Elise was reminded of her dreams. Was there any truth to those dreams?
Was the girl in the castle that she saw... really herself?
No, no, that was too… bizzare, Elise thought.
Alexei looked at Elise intently and realized there might be some truth to his assumption. Elise might actually be an immortal, but she didn't know it.
What happened to her that she didn't remember?
The man cleared his throat. "You know, I don't want to pry into your life, but what suddenly made you change your mind?"
Elise looked up to him absent-mindedly.. "…?"
Seeing that she might not hear him the first time, Alexei carefully repeated his question. "I remember you being so adamant about me staying away from you and your husband that I thought you hated me."
"Hated you?" Elise shook her head. "I don't hate you at all, even though we have our differences in how we see the world. I was just scared of Loriel discovering a part of me that I didn't even recognize. You're a part of that."
Alexei tilted his head. "I see… but that still doesn't answer the question."
Elise frowned at the young man, but knew that she couldn't just get away without saying anything. If Alexei was willing to divulge information about who he was and even helped her… what was wrong to tell him the truth?
She lowered her head dejectedly and finally muttered, "I discovered that I was pregnant twice before, but I can't remember it at all."
"Oh…" Alexei's gaze turned sympathetic when he heard her reply. "I am sorry to hear that."
"It's okay," Elise lowered her head and bit her lip. She could accept the fact that she couldn't remember anything about her past, which might be dark and scary, and started over a new life with Loriel.
However, now that she knew she might have children out there… she was determined to know.
Her heart bled when she thought about them. What happened to her children? Were they still alive? Who was their father?
***
Meanwhile, in a penthouse in Midtown, Loriel was distraught when he woke up to find Elise was gone and there was only a letter on the living room table. His heart was filled with worry when he picked up the letter and started reading what's written on it.
================
Loriel, I apologize for leaving without saying a single word. You must be panicking, hurt and maybe even upset. I'm not even sure if you'll have it in your heart to forgive me, but I need to do this.
There are so many things I've yet to learn about myself before I can consider the chance of truly becoming your wife and living the entirety of our lives together. I'm a terrible woman, I know.
After the conversation with the doctor, I discovered something about me that I can't remember at all. I was actually pregnant twice and I didn't even know that? What kind of mother was I?
What happened in my past that led me to forget? Was I married before?? I need to find out. I cannot live my life pretending that everything is fine.
When my father, Daniel York, took me in as part of his family, I became happy to stay at his side and live the life of his daughter. Deep in his heart, he probably knew the truth that I wasn't his, but he still decided to take me in and live together as a family.
I do not think I can continue living a life with nothing but blissful ignorance.
Things are different now that I'm married to you, Loriel. I can't live a life with you without making sure that there isn't anything else important that I've forgotten and abandoned just to move on.
I am not sure how long it will take to find the truth about everything, so please don't look for me. Once I know who I am, I will need time to think about what I should do with that information. My past might be too dark and scary, or I might have another family that I have abandoned unintentionally… thus we cannot be together.
Please.. please.. understand that I don't want to hurt you. However, I have a responsibility to my children to find them… or at least find out what happened to them.
Thinking about this has made me feel distraught and sad. It broke my heart, not knowing what happened in the past. Please let me go and find myself. I need to do this.
- Love, Elise
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The words were blurry at the end of the letter and Loriel realized Elise must be crying when she was writing this letter for him. Gosh… why was he so dumb and careless?
He knew they were visiting an obgyn. From the examination she conducted, she must be able to tell about Elise's previous pregnancies. When did she tell Elise about it? Was it when Loriel went to get the medicines?
Dammit!
Loriel clutched the letter tightly in his hand and tried his best not to wrinkle it despite his unyielding grip. The man closed his eyes and tried not to clench his teeth.
Everything was going wonderfully so why did things have to turn out this way? He should have been the one to tell Elise everything…
She shouldn't have found out from other people. Loriel could imagine how distraught she must be feeling when she found out that she was pregnant before.
She must have a million questions about everything. But why left? How would she find answers?
"Elise…"
Loriel should have told the truth about their relationship when he had a chance. It was funny to think that Loriel believed he could hide the truth about their past and live the rest of his days in peace with Elise.
"I'm so stupid," he muttered.
.
.
************
Sorry for the delay in publishing this chapter. I got two back-to-back interpreting sessions with my client, and after the work was done, I died a little...
Just kidding (but almost felt like it tho). Not a single cell in my brain wanted to do any more work, and writing is a lot of brainwork.
Anyway... I hope you like this chapter ^^.
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