The Butcher of Gadobhra

"You look like a four-day old carcass that even the vultures won't eat, son. What the hell did you get up to? Not that you have to tell me, you being in charge and all. Old Joe just gets a might curious as he slaves away here in the pit while you go galivanting off with dwarves, bugs, and strange women."

"Not with the women again. Ben gives me enough shit as is. Not my fault that barbarian was drunk and horny."

"Barbarian? I was talking about the out-worlder serving drinks in the tavern."

"Out-worlder? Suzette? What are you talking about, Joe."

"My bad, you don't want to talk about women? I'll be quiet. But how'd you lose most of your clothes and get so chewed up if it wasn't a woman?

Ozzy was too tired and totally unarmed for any battle of wits. He leaned back against the edge of the pit and soaked up a little heat and told Joe about the latest foray into the dungeon.

Joe whistled as he told him about the CSP they earned, but Ozzy neglected to mention the part about feeding the dungeon. "A level 10 Elite? Oh, that will kick you up to Tier 2 for sure. Nice, very nice. You have any ideas on how you're spending those points."

Ozzy was about half asleep by this point. "Nope. But I bet you do. Tell me about Pitmaster some."

"Good thing to ask about. Lots of butchers make charnel pits. They burn the souls of the things they slay and butcher and feed the power to whoever they serve. A Pitmaster is a bit more independent. A lot of your focus is on cooking what you kill, turning it various types of food with magical effects. A lot of large armies try to hire a Pitmaster. Having food that increases the mana generation of your mages or gives your fighters more health can be a huge benefit. That Legion Centurion isn't interested in you just because your big and strong. He can find a hundred guys as big as you if he needs to. An independent Pitmaster is a lot rarer."

"Huh, hadn't really thought about it that way. Magical meats? Is that most of what I could do at tier 2?" Ozzy had always enjoyed the times he spent in a kitchen. This might turn out a lot better than he'd imagined.

"Mostly. But there's also the Smoke." Joe looked at the fire and suddenly all the smoke condensed around his hand. "Smoke magic can be subtle and take your breath away, or it can lunge at you like a wild animal, bringing with it the heat of the fire that made it." The smoke took the form of a wolf with huge teeth and jaws that dripped fire.

Ozzy was wide awake now. The wolf was an amazing thing, both insubstantial but deadly. Like smoke. He was starting to understand. "I could learn to do that?"

Joe pointed at a mostly uncooked sedge beast carcass and sent the wolf off to play with it. The smoke and flames wrapped around the meat and Ozzy could hear it start to sizzle like it was on a grill. "Maybe. Depends on a few things. You need some fire and some darkness in you to really understand smoke like I do, but there's other ways to get its attention. Air and Fire will do it, but I don't like to do it that way. Air doesn't bring the fuel that dark mana from COR does, and doesn't quite have the subtlety. More hot wind and flash."

"But that's up to you son, don't let an old smoke elemental tell you what to do. If you like the bar-b-que, nothing wrong with just doing that. Or if you want to have fun and pick up a little power, you let me know how I can help."

Ozzy was looking at the skills he could buy. "I'd guess that picking up the skill Playing with Fire would help? That would give me a better fire aspect."

Joe hid a small grin, he felt like a fisherman reeling in a whale. "Yup, big help there. Then a couple points of CORR to sweeten the deal, and you'll get the Big Smoke's attention for sure. I'll even put in a good word for you." Joe hoped Big Smoke wasn't still pissed at him. But sometimes you have to take some chances.

Ozzy looked at his options. "COR? Hmm, can't do it just now with CSP. I've increased three different stats, so I can't just buy the points. I might have EP to put into it from the fight. How high do I have to get it Joe?

“Oh, any bit might trigger it. But the more the better. Especially since you have that bit of radiance in you. Not sure how that will work.”

Ozzy considered; he liked the idea of balance, keeping his COR and RAD equal. At the same time, he didn't want to miss out on getting an aspect of magic and some spells. “What are repercussions of having a lot of COR, if it's going to push me towards the dark side I'm not to keen on the idea?”

“Hard to say. People get all upset when you take a side. Of course, they get mad when you don’t take a side. Having high RAD or COR is sort of a flag saying who you might fight for, and how strong you are. But it’s less of a problem for mortals. A monster with high COR or RAD is going to be influenced by it a lot more. They have a story to play out, or are part of a quest, or it's just in their nature. Intelligent creatures make more choices and have a lot more freedom. You’ve got some COR now; I don’t see it causing a problem with either of your friends who have all that RAD burning inside of them.”

“Good points. I’ll have to chance it. I’m liking the idea of smoke magic.”

“I've got an idea, but it might bring a bit of trouble. I'll need you to help out in case something happens. Give me some time for a nap, and another couple of healing potions. Then we'll toss out some bait."

"Going fishing? You'll look awful funny trying to use a pole with broken arms." Ozzy turned his head and saw Ben walking up, a tankard in his hand. Here, I brought you some liquid refreshment. I've got something to try, and this is about the only painkiller we have." Ben set a full mug of ale by Ozzy.

"I'm hoping that this might help you out a bit. I picked up a new healing spell. Hold still." As soon as Ben put a hand on Ozzy's shoulder, he started to relax. The pain was going away, no beer needed. Muscles held tight against the pain and strained tendons suddenly felt better. After several castings he was feeling much better."

"Damn, I like that spell. I don't think I could have even lifted that mug of ale before you healed me up. No pain by the way, not even when bones moved a bit. I think it has a numbing effect."

Ben had dumped the rest of his mana pool into Ozzy, and the change was very apparent. Ozzy looked healthier, more relaxed. "That should help with those broken bones a lot, but be careful, they aren't fully healed. Taking a nap is still a good idea. The general has me running around some, but I'll try to be around this evening and heal you up again when i get some mana back."

"Thanks Ben, thinking on that myself a bit. I'll take your advice on that nap."

Ozzy laid back and was soon asleep. Joe looked at the butcher he was not-technically bond to. The boy was getting stronger, and it was obvious he was picking up some points of CHR. That would help a lot. But it sounded like they were both fishing for something today. What the hell was the boy trying to pull in? Have to let him have his nap and see.

                          =*=

A bit later, Ozzy stood at top of the pit. The fire below had been refueled and was burning hot. Ozzy brought up the skills list and selected one.

Demonic Bargain

The Devil is in the Details.

A bargain.

Nearly immediately, a woman similar to one of the hellions he'd seen before showed up. She rose from the fire of the pit on bat-like wings, wearing what amounted to a French bikini made from dragon scales. The red scales went well with her tanned skin and dark hair. Ozzy wondered if there was a CHA requirement for either group. Both the hellions and the angels that he had met could have gotten work as fashion models.

A large pen and several pages of parchment were in her hands. "Ooh, now that's a nice fire. Really got me warmed up are rarin' to go. What did you have in mind big guy? Or did you maybe want to play around a bit first? That's a freebie on me by the way. Call me Lilibeth, or just Lil for short. Hell, call me anything you want." She moved towards Ozzy and he found it hard to look at her face and not her heaving chest that was doing it's best to escape the top of her bathing suit.

"That's a generous offer Lil, but let's do a bit of business first."

She nodded and put on a pair of glasses. "Business first, I like that in a man. Just sign here and we'll fill in all the details. What were you thinking about? A bit of revenge? Power? We've got a special this month for would be Warlords. A lot of land is up for grabs. If you're up for some conquering and pillaging we can set you up with a small horde of minions. "

Ozzie pointed at the pit. Keeping a straight face, he said "I'm actually looking for a long term extended warranty. I'm worried about anything happening to my pit now that I'm putting a lot of work into it and it's my source of income."

Lilibeth felt herself go weak in the knees. She leaned against the mortal and couldn't help thinking about what she was going to do with him later. An extended warranty? Long term? This guy was going to get so much free time with her! No one signed a warranty out of the blue! This was her chance to really move up!

Too late she realized her mistake. She'd wasted several seconds swooning at the thought, and forgot what might be triggered by the mortals’ words.

"HOLD HARLOT! I'll not let you entice this mortal into a worthless warranty that you'll void as fast as you drop your knickers!"

An angel had appeared, wearing white robes with a beer stain on the front, and holding a flaming sword. (A very short flaming sword. Sort of a flaming butter knife, actually. He'd been out eating with friends when the call came in and this was the most dangerous weapon he could find on short notice.)

He also had a long scroll in his hand. "I have here a much better Long Term Extended Warranty used by all the finest Pitmasters in creation. Just back slowly away from the strumpet and we can get you signed right up." This was going to be tricky. She'd gotten here first, and even the angel was having trouble looking away from the goods she had on display. But any mortal dumb enough to go for an extended warranty would be easy to sway with a superior angelic product.

"Sorry buddy, but me and Lil here were just working out some details. I'll have to say no to whatever you’re selling."

"But sir! This is about your immortal soul and getting the best insurance policy you can, I'm sure....."

Ozzy interrupted the angel, and turned to Lil, putting his arm around her shoulders. "Hey honey, do you mind putting your hands above you head, and jiggling around a bit for me?" Lil was delighted to do just that. She knew she had him now, and better yet, the stupid wingding couldn't take his eyes off her either. Could she corrupt them both?"

Ozzy spoke harshly to the angel. "I guess they don't teach you guys from heaven that 'No means No.' You were told to not bother me."

The smoke golem took that as his que.

Heavy chains of smoke wrapped around the angel, smothering him. Joe, in his elemental form, pulled him down into the pit. The angel tried to sever the smokey bonds holding him, but you don't burn smoke with fire. Or a butter knife. With in seconds Joe was stuffing him into the fire pit, and burying him with heavy logs and coal. Muffled screams could be heard coming from the fire pit.

Lilibeth was stunned, and then very afraid. She realized that she'd been a fool, going after a 'too-good-to-be-true' deal, and tempted by a mortal with bulging muscles. A classic set-up. And now she was going to pay the price. Just like the angel had already paid. The mortal had his arm lightly around her, but she could feel his strength. He was far more dangerous than he should be. And twinkling inside him was the radiance she'd missed at first.

She turned and pressed herself against him, actually afraid. "Please? I'll do what you want. No contract needed. I'll even tell you my true name and let you bind me. Just don't do to me what you did to him."

You have slain an angel! What despicable, foul, and horrible sort of being are you that you do such a thing?

Your soul is corrupted with darkness!

+1 COR

Look, we'll cut you a deal. How's that? Toss the bat bimbo in the same spot you threw Arnie, and we'll call it even and give you a point of RAD to balance it all out.

Ozzy smiled, that's what he was waiting for. That was one point of COR, now to bargain for some more. He looked down at the terrified hellion and wiped away her tears. She really was a cute little thing. But business before pleasure.

"Actually, I do need that warranty. I'm thinking you give me 99 years of coverage on my pit for 1 gold a year. How about it Lil?"

Lilibeth recovered quickly. Fear melted away as they got down to bargaining. "What? 1 gold? I'd need at least a 100 a year, and some corruption to go with it."

"Well, I might take on a bit, but only if the price was right." Eventually Ozzy got a deal for 7 gold a year, +4 COR, and a promise of a date with Lilibeth. She had been pretty firm on that last part. In exchange, any damage to his pit from any source would be repaired. She was a bit disappointed though when instead of signing, Ozzy handed her a card for Coppertwist, Fellrock, Kindfeld and Bumplasonek. Lil might be cute, but he saw the cunning in her as well. Having his lawyer take a look was a good idea.

As she started to fly off, she turned and leaped at Ozzy, her legs wrapping around his waist and kissing him hard. This went on for a half minute until he heard a growl from behind him. Lil looked over his shoulder and disengaged. "Oops, got to go, be seeing you." She waved to someone behind him and evaporated into fire.

He turned to find Suzette staring at him, holding a plate of eggs and bacon. Before he could say anything, his breakfast was scattered over his face and chest, and she was walking angrily away.

Joe was tending the fire as the fuel burned down and the screams continued. "You really have a way with the women folk, don't you son?".

Ozzy managed to salvage the bacon. He'd have to grab a couple of muffins at the morning meeting. And get used to the taste. He wasn't going anywhere near the tavern until Suzette calmed down, which might take a few days.

Joe continued laughing and enjoying the angels screams. This was going to make some nice charcoal and then some great sausages. "I'll admit that I don't like these guys, but I'm wondering why you're pissed off at them?"

Ozzy shrugged. "They just annoy me. They try to take away peoples choice and sign them up for their little armies. He didn't have to show up here. And when I said no he could have left. But his type don't take no for an answer."

Joe said, "Well, I appreciate it. These guys make great screaming charcoal. But I suspect you did it so you could pick up a point or two of corruption?"

"Yeah, I picked up a point for the charbroiled angel, and then another big chunk of corruption for free when I signed the deal with Lil. The cost of the warranty is steep, but you can buy it down with points. I had one point from before, this deal gives me five more. I used some EP from our dungeon crawl to bring my COR stat to 4. So with the bonuses I'm up to 10. And I don't have to worry about this war doing damage to my pit."

"Holy roasted goblin on a stick! You picked up nine points of corruption all at once? Nine?! What were you thinking?"

Ozzy chuckled, "Well, I was thinking that I could get a cheap warranty, and the points I need to get smoke magic. The angel was a bonus. You're worried though. Why? I don't feel any different."

Joe nodded, "Oh, you never do. Things will seem normal, that's the horror of both the light and the dark. You might not even notice the changes. Then one day you're burning a city and it seems natural to you. "

"But mortals don't need COR or RAD to do unspeakable horrors. They can be saints or devils all on their own. A lust for power or control can change you just as easily. Or alcoholism. Drug addition. Sex. Lots of ways to go bad that don't involve getting caught up in a struggle between mino powers of light and dark."

"Still, you should be feeling something. You angry at all? Depressed?"

Ozzie stretched. "Just tired as hell. But I suspect that some of ACME's tinkering is coming in handy in ways they didn't think about. I'm happy as a clam most days, even working a double shift and only eating groat muffins. COR has to work hard to get through that Endure ability that they gave us."

"And I bet you were planning on that all along. I'm curious now, you have a bunch of points and didn't have to spend it on corruption, what did you pick up instead? "

"Some good stuff. Another level of mitigation, magic eyes, and I maxed out Yo' mama is ugly. Actually, sort of wishing I could fight in this war. The last chunk of points let me finish up my unarmed skills and get If the one doesn't get you, the other one will."

"Oh, spoiling for a fight, are we?" Joe turned away, messing with the fire, smiling. The young ones always wanted to out and fight when they got new abilities, that doesn't change.

"Yeah, I am. Those Momco. idiots have been causing problems for weeks. A few broken skulls might teach them some lessons."

Joe asked “How often do you just decide to go bash in people’s heads.”

Ozzy had to think about that. “I don’t, not like that. I get even if someone screws with me, or my friends. But I don’t just go to town to pick a fight. Why am I thinking that way? Is this the corruption?”

Joe nodded, “Or not sleeping all night, getting torn up in a dungeon and breaking bones, lets add a girl you care about getting pissed and decorating you with your breakfast. Add in dealing with a hellion, who I might add specialize in messing with your head, and the added stress of this little war. You’ve got a lot of things to make you mad and want to lash out.”

“And then the corruption comes along and whispers in your ear. Let’s say you did go get in a fight, blow off some steam, and feel better. Then the next time your get upset, it’s easier to go do the same. Soon it’s a habit and you look for a reason to be pissed off so you can go hit people.”

Ozzy stared at the smoke golem. “And you recommended me taking this on?”

“I did when you said you wanted smoke magic, but I thought you could handle it. Still do. And ultimately, it's your decision, not mine. Actions have consequences.”

“But I wasn't worried before. I figure you can handle it alright. And with that spiffy mental protection you have going, you should do ok. Even with nine damned points at once! Just think about things when you get mad or feel bad. Ask where the feeling is coming from. And if that doesn't work I'll hit you in the back of the head with a shovel and tie you up for a bit until it passes."

That made sense to Ozzy. It was just another thing he needed to control in his life.

“Thanks Joe, that puts things in perspective some. I'll do some thinking on it. I’ll be back later and start on the next round of carcasses. Got some stuff to do."

First things first. He needed to go apologize to Suzette, then clean up and get a couple of hours sleep. Get a handle on this tendency to get angry before it got him in trouble.

And that chest! They hadn't even bothered to open the chest they were so beat up.

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