The Butcher of Gadobhra
Chapter 389: Weaponizing Merchants and Merchandizing WarDespite being told to be at ease, everyone at least sketched a small bow. The only one who gave less was Ozzy, who just inclined his head. Jorges gave a salute, Legion style, then stood at ease. The god bent and examined the war machine.
"My, this is sleek and pretty. Design and looks don't kill things, but I do prefer a weapon that looks like it will kill things, and this does that. Hmmm, and self-cocking if you keep a supply of mana in the storage crystal; that's a nice touch. The rate of fire is important in any engagement. Being able to bring the angle higher for flyers is a no-brainer that, sadly, people with no brains always forget. It looks like you have room for four of them up here. Tell me, what would you do if I dropped a group of hippogriffs or a dragon straight down on you?"
Jorges pointed to the four main towers at the points of the 'star' and the four secondary towers at the lesser points. "I anticipate that will be a popular tactic for anyone with such troops. The main tower sticks up like a challenge to anyone attacking. Drop a dragon down, and the machines on the other towers will have some easy shots at it, especially if it lands. There are settings on each machine to pre-target the top of this tower."
Ares nodded, half-expecting the answer and happy to see the preparations. "Very nice. The design of this fortress is very functional. Each wall and tower can defend two others, turning the whole thing into a threshing machine as long as there are enough soldiers to man it. But I'll point out that I don't see the war machines needed. There are many empty mountings. Tell me why."
Layla spread her hands. "Politics and accounting games. We supplied the first shipment here to Rowan Keep, and Imperial functionaries showed up with a commander from Northguard and 'borrowed' them. The Centurion in charge of Rowan was told to order more and wait a few years. The Baron and I will be honoring our agreement, but giving the same weasels another chance to pilfer our work isn't a winning move."
"No, it isn't. On that much, we agree. Now, let's talk about 'Weaponizing Hermes's Sealing magic,’ shall we?"
"Certainly. As I was mentioning to your priests, strengthening the walls and making them immune to magical damage as long as the shield holds forces an attacker to use different strategies. They'll have to assault the walls, which gives the Legion a force multiplier. Even large creatures will have problems attacking when being poked by poisoned ballista bolts. Regular foot troops will take huge losses from bow fire and magic, while the keep can ignore most enemy magic and take far less damage from missiles. Enemy losses will be huge in such a scenario."
Ares stared down, looking at the keep for long minutes. "And you put his shrine inside a market, surrounded by people selling beer and sausages? That seems sacrilegious, somehow."
"The local priestess came up with the idea. Hermes was delighted. He's a god of merchants, and every transaction counts as worship, which will generate mana for the shield. Hungry off-duty soldiers will power up their own defense."
"And he'll get such a set-up in each fortress built with his shield, which will make him happy. And now you want to make me happy by showing off your shiny new toys and asking for a blessing? And come to think of it, where is my shrine?"Layla pretended she was pitching a deal to the board of directors. "You're standing on it. We proposed the idea of most of the central tower being dedicated to you. Your priests can decide on the best use for the rooms on each level."
The god turned to his priests. "I'm sure you lads know what's best, but I've always thought it would be nice to have a place for retired and wounded veterans to live and pass on their knowledge and weapons training to the younger warriors. There's a lot of room here for that. And I'm sure other large fortresses would follow the example set here."
Both priests nodded, with a small frown appearing on Demetrios' face for just an instant.
"Ah, yes, the cost of that. It's one thing to give an order and another to make sure your soldiers have the tools to carry it out. I'll speak with the main temple. I'm sure they think they need another golden statue of me, but there are better uses for that money. The last one was gaudy as hell. There’s a reason it got lost in a storage room, accidentally."
"I may have a solution that will help." Layla produced a small catalog, freshly drawn on trimmed parchment. "Have you ever thought of sponsoring a line of war machines? I want to start selling to more people than just the Legion. Only the best of course, and every one of them inspected by your priests before your symbol goes on it."
The god looked at the catalog, showing ballistae, onagers, catapults, and rams. All the machines came in multiple sizes and variations, some simple and some with extravagant engineering like the prototype they were currently looking at. " Interesting...' War by Ares. War Machines by ACME. Every weapon inspected by the Priests of Ares for workmanship and accuracy.' You want to put my name on your weapons? I think I see your battle plan. For a small fee, my priests will bless your weapons, and that income can be put to the care of older and injured warriors. You weaponized Hermes, and now you want to merchandise me. Amazing that you have the audacity to ask me for that."
Layla was hoping that comparison wouldn't be noticed. Time to work with the customer, and encourage them to see it a different way. "With all due respect, that's not how we see it. We want our brand to mean something and to have a reputation for being the best. By having every one of our machines inspected by an outside specialist, people will know the prices we charge are giving them a weapon of outstanding quality. And we don't expect your priests to do that without compensation for their time. We’ll pay them a fair fee. Then it’s up to them to make sure those fees go to a project you approve of."
“I see...and what would you think this fee will amount to? I'm just a simple soldier, and I find counting up the Butcher's Bill at the end of each battle to be all the math I wish to do." He turned and regarded Ozzy. "You know where that term comes from, don't you, titan?"
Ozzy nodded, "Old naval term meaning the count of the wounded and the dead after a battle."
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"Just so. Most think it has something to do with the infamous Butcher's Brigade, but it's older than that, from far, far away. And a small cantrip whispered in my ear a tally of your own body count. Very impressive for one so young. I can see why Artemis marked you with her 'Hands Off!' symbol. Weaponized Workers indeed, along with soldier-farmers and a new Butcher's Brigade. And while Artemis can claim you as artisans, when you march to war, you'll do so as some of mine. Tell me, Butcher, what do you think my name and symbol are worth?"
Ozzy sat on the crenellations and considered the problem. "Don't give them your name. You represent all of war, not a small niche like these machines. You know better than I the value of a name. Let them advertise that your priests inspect the items, making sure that each one would please you and that only the best are worthy to carry your symbol. Saying 'War by Ares.' costs you nothing. It's an obvious statement. You are war, after all. And scrap those smaller and cheaper models. Make your symbol synonymous with only the best. All the materials need to be equivalent to Tier 3, and no skimping on runes and clever engineering. Only allow the top-of-the-line and the very best. Jorges designed the basic schematics and would be perfect to decide on the half a dozen machines to make up the line."
The god considered the man just mentioned. He looked deeply at Jorges, who didn't flinch. His heritage was old, as old as the Legion, and where the idea of Legion came from. He built weapons and fortresses that pleased the god of war. "Agreed. And I'd like to talk to you further, Jorges. This fortress is needed elsewhere, as well as your weapons. We can discuss ways to make that happen.”
That brought a smile to Jorge's face. "I'd like that."
“But back to the main question. What price, titan? Give me your counsel."
Ozzy spread his hands. "My advice is consult the local priestess of Hermes. She's good with deals and has negotiated with ACME before."
Layla's head snapped around, but she shut her mouth before speaking.
Ares noticed and smiled. "I think that's a wonderful idea."
Suzette was found below, working with Vladimir, painting his runes on the large stone they'd taken from the ghouls. When the message had come, she'd flown up the stairs. Layla hated the first words out of her mouth: "No fee. Go for a cut of the profits. As prices go up, which is common in a war, the inspection fee should go up as well. Your priests will be busy."
Layla gritted her teeth. "I think we could do that. A guaranteed cut of the net profits."
"Net profits? No way in hell. We take it off the gross sale. If we do net profit, you and Billy can wiggle your fingers, and the books will barely show a profit. You'll include all the costs of research, transportation, and anything else you can toss in to lower the profit on the books. I think 25% of gross sales would be fine."
"What, that's insane. We won't be making that much profit selling these."
"Then you aren't charging enough. And I don’t believe you, anyway. Most of your labor will be done by contract workers for the next three years and probably longer. None of the resources are expensive, even the stuff coming through Lord Alwyn."
"10% of the gross income in gold."
"Nope. There needs to be a standard cost for each item charged to the Legion. Most of which you won't sell for gold; it's going to offset taxes. The minimum owed to the priesthood is 25% of the standard Legion price. If you charge more, you pay more. Any trade, swap deal, or loss in a poker game will count as a sale, at the higher of what you gain or the legion price."
Ares watched the women argue, happy to watch, and only understanding part of what was being said.
"Agreed on the swaps, but the most you get is 15%."
"And the least you'll get out of me is 20%, plus, if a weapon is found defective, you pay an additional 10%."
"Pay twice? Outrageous!"
"Then get it right the first time!"
"I want an exclusive deal."
"Sure, one year exclusive."
"Bullshit, make it 99 years."
"No war lasted that long; why should you be exclusive."
Ares started to speak and saw the titan holding a finger to his lips to be silent. Ares nodded at the sound advice. Why enter a war you were ill-equipped for?
"Seven-year exclusive, 20%, swaps count as sales.
"Done, but the exclusive can be canceled by Ares himself at any time if he is unhappy with the quality of work."
Layla looked at the god. A Wargod wouldn't haul you into court for a grievance, they showed up with an army. "Agreed. If he's not happy, we aren't happy, and the deal ends. But if he and his priests are happy, we extend it another seven years."
The two women shook hands, and Ares placed his own hand on theirs. "I approve of this agreement between the Baroness of Gadobhra and my priesthood. With one stipulation: You sell to anyone. I am not a god of the Empire; I am the god of war. More than just the Legion pays me tribute."
Layla knew Billy would love that rule. "If they have gold, ACME will sell to them."
Ozzy had one last piece of advice for the god of war: “A small point, but you might consider calling the money paid by ACME to your priesthood a tax and not a fee.”
“I will admit that I fail to see the difference; please enlighten me.”
Ozzy smiled evilly, “Well if it’s a fee, there needs to be some sort of accounting and paperwork. Your priesthood isn’t trained to go over the books, but ACME will have accountants who are. But if you call it a tax…”
“Then it falls into the domain of Hades, as well. His legion of scribblers will delight in the work and will make sure of the accounting. I find your counsel pleasing, titan.”
Suzette looked pleased as well, anything that would keep Billy and Layla on their toes would help her. She had one last question for Layla: "Just a guess, but how much business do you think you can do this next year selling Ares-approved war machines and building fortresses for the Legion?"
"With this endorsement? If we can't do a million in gold, I'll join a nunnery."
There was a roar of energy as mana poured into the Hermetic Shield, and it became visible in the night as a glowing barrier surrounding Rowan Keep. Ten seconds later, a dozen fireballs and other spells impacted against the shield, doing no harm. Ares smiled, "Look, the fireworks are starting."
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