The Butcher of Gadobhra

Ozzy admired the little bank as he walked up to it. The quality of the work showed in every detail, from the polished brass fittings on the door to the clear glass of the small windows set precisely into oak frames. The brickwork was polished, giving a professional feel to the building. The best part was the clock on the third floor, bright copper hands marking the hours of the day. Suzette said the banker had appeared one day after she had spent building points on the option for a gnomish bank. The bank had been here waiting for him.

She'd briefed him on its usefulness after it got bigger. That had been one consideration for emptying his chest of the wealth he'd brought back from the Smoke. Woodrat had settled up with him and had done a fair and accurate accounting of his shares going back to the creation of the Splinter. The second reason was needing room; the chest overflowed with golden shells, jewelry, and fire-infused gems. He wanted to empty it so he could fill it up again with more loot.

The bank was a blessing to the town. Having a secure place to keep their savings made everyone feel better. Every worker was putting their extra cash in the bank. Too many thieves and rogues were in the game; not everyone had an enchanted dead bird to yell warnings. Ozzy knocked twice, then opened the door and walked in. He had to duck through the doorway, but the ceiling was much higher.

A cheerful gnome greeted him, dressed in an old fashion suit similar to what he'd seen his lawyer wear. Banker Coppertwist was much younger than Ozzy had expected, although he had to admit that he had no reference for judging the age of a gnome. For all he knew, this youthful-looking banker could be 200 years old. "Good day, sir. Welcome to the Royal Gnomish Bank of Sedgewick. I am the banker, Tiberius Longfellow Coppertwist. But please. Might you be our local Butcher? Your fame precedes you, sir" He stuck out his hand, which Ozzy carefully shook. "What services can I offer to you? Would you like to open an account with us? I can guarantee the complete security of your gold. We also offer merchant accounts for your business."

There wasn't much to the bank—a long marble counter, behind which was an oak, roll-top desk and wooden swivel chair. A small hearth had a stove with an iron teapot on top. Next to the desk was a sturdy-looking metal safe bolted to the floor with a complex lock. "Both, I think. One for myself and one for the Butcher Shop."

The banker smiled and happily pulled out paperwork for Ozzy to read and sign. He remembered to add Runt to the merchant account. His apprentice was doing a great job and practically ran the whole shop. He seemed completely happy with that. Ozzy brought him raw meat from the stockyards to cut up and his special meats from the Smokehouse to sell to adventurers. They split the profits between them.

"How much would you like to start your accounts with, Sir? It can be as little as one copper. We take all accounts, and no business is too small."

Ozzy had questions. "Do you only take coins? Suzette explained a little about how your bank operated, particularly that a larger amount of wealth meant a stronger bank. Do you take other items of value?"

The banker's smile got larger. "Of course, sir. I have much discretion in what types of wealth I store for you. There are some rules, of course: No bulk goods and we aren't a storehouse. Artwork, gems, and jewelry are all accepted, but a small bank like mine would struggle with huge statues unless they were exceedingly valuable. I can ask for a special team to pick them up in that case. The rules are more like guidelines, but if it would go into a dragon's horde, then chances are I can accept it."

Ozzy pulled out a small pouch. "This is to open the merchant account. Runt will probably be over later with more that he's been hiding in his mattress."

The banker poured out the contents of the pouch and picked up one of the golden shell coins, and buffed one until it shined. "These are from the Smoke? I love them. The king's horde master likes variety and will also love them." He quickly counted them, gave Ozzy a receipt, and then showed him how to access his bank account.

"Do you mind a large deposit? I have quite a bit I'd like to put into my personal account."

The gnome smiled. As if there was too much gold in the world? "I will happily take as much as you wish to deposit, sir. The volume of that little safe does not limit me. Your money will be deposited to the main horde in Cinderstein."

The Butcher nodded and concentrated on the tattoo of a sea chest. The Banker raised an eyebrow as it appeared on the counter. "Good, then all this is going in my personal account." Ozzy casually flipped up the hasps, tilted the chest, and spilled gold and gems across the counter. Piles of golden coins and shell coins were mixed with glowing red gems and bits of jewelry. Not every ship that Ozzy and Woodrat looted had yielded treasure, but quite a few had turned out to have hidden loot in the captain's cabin or a hold. Some of the undead had also been wearing fine rings or pendants. Bit by bit, Woodrat had filled the Deadman's Chest with treasure.

The gnome started breathing hard and had to get a fan to cool himself off and a glass of cold tea before he could settle down. "My greatest apologies, sir. Very unprofessional of me. This is my first time taking a deposit of this size." He began separating the coins from the gems. A half-hour later, he gave Ozzy an accounting.

"I have triple-checked my counts, sir. After converting the silver coinage to gold, you have a value in coinage of 31,890 gold coins. I estimate the small pile of jewelry to be worth 2,100 gold, bringing your total to 33 900 gold coins on deposit. In addition to that are 34 enchanted rubies. These can be stored, or His Majesty's gem masters can make an offer."

"Let's just store the gems for now; thank you. And once we have this taken care of, I also have some magical items I'd like to see about storing. Those help you level up your bank, even if I store them?"

The banker smiled at the thought of more wealth. What the Butcher had deposited so far had helped push him to the halfway point of the bank's next level and a silver key. His family would be quite excited about how well his bank was going and his eventual advancement. It might take a few more years, but his mother would be negotiating with other families and shopping for his first wife. "Of course, sir. We don't recommend using the bank for short-term storage, as retrieving items can take several days, but in any case, my bank and the king's horde benefit from the wealth they represent."

Ozzy reached into his bag and pulled out the Hammer of Gopher Thumping. "This needs to be put away. I'm not looking forward to needing this ever again."

The Banker sucked in his breath, then pulled out an ornate pair of glasses, calipers, and magnifying glasses. He went over the hammer carefully. "Sir, this is a Legendary Artifact! The king's experts will have to authenticate it, but I'm almost sure of what this is! Astounding!"

Ozzy remembered the letter from his lawyer. "This should help. I have a letter from your great-uncle with his appraisal." He showed the letter from his Lawyer to his new Banker. Who scanned it and looked up with a shell-shocked expression on his face. "All of this was in the same horde—my goodness. Your raiding party must have been huge to have killed a creature hoarding this wealth. I take it that the hammer was your share?"

Ozzy shook his head and dug into his bag further. "Not exactly a raid, more like a one-sided fight, and I was stupid enough to take the first swing." He pulled out a quart crockery jar from the bag, an ornate standing mirror, and a chariot missing one wheel. "Won this all on a wager. I'll keep the bag, but the rest of this can be deposited, and hopefully, the value helps your bank."

The Banker scanned the items with his glasses, mumbling to himself and referring to the letter.

Chariot of Mulfistucles (Legendary): Missing one Wheel,

Mirror of Harsh Truths (Legendary)

Large quart crockery jar of Bad Jam, sealed. (Legendary)

Tiberius Coppertwist was motionless and staring as he watched the Butcher pulled the Legendary items out of the equally Legendary bag on the floor. The letter from his Great-Uncle was proof enough for him, and he was sure that the old lawyer would help him verify the items if needed, but he had faith in the gnomish banking system and was certain they would value these items correctly. As the Butcher finished and pulled his bag shut, he smiled at his banker.

"So what do you think?"

Tiberius answered truthfully. "I think these are extremely valuable. I think I need to close for the day and notify my branch manager. I think I will then lie down for a small nap until they arrive. After that, I hope to have good news for the Mayor about options for her village. Oh, and I will talk to my mother about my wedding."

Ozzy shook his hand again. "You're getting married? Congratulations."

"I am now. I'm sure of it."

Ozzy took his receipt and left, leaving the gnome to his business. It felt good to be cleaning out his bag. He returned to Suzette to see her talking to a female adventurer. A successful one. She looked high-level and had some nice gear. The woman waved and walked off, eating the last of the dessert. He went to Myrna and got another plateful.

"Figure out your classes?"

Suzette looked after the woman. "I started to, and now I'm more confused than ever."

Tiberius Longfellow Coppertwist wrote a note to himself to send his Great-Uncle a pound of his favorite tobacco and another letter thanking him for this opportunity. Then he took a box from a shelf, opened it, and removed a small mirror. It was for emergencies only, and the fine for using it without dire need was a thousand gold coins. He was certain this counted as an emergency and didn't hesitate to use it. "This is Tiberius Longfellow Coppertwist at the Royal Gnomish Bank of Sedgewick. I have a code-37 and multiple code-3. Repeat: Multiple code-3." The mirror flashed three times, acknowledging the message, and then cracked into small shards of glass. Tiberius carefully swept them up and put on a pot of tea for the guests arriving soon. Then he took a short nap.

Less than ten minutes later, a glowing circle appeared in the village square of Sedgwick, followed by four gnomish warriors in golden plate armor with bright shields and swords. Between them appeared two senior bankers, three expert appraisers, and His Royal Highness Prince Rupert Cinderstein. The Prince was in training at the Royal vaults and had been brought along to observe. Code-3s were rare. Multiple Code-3s only happened when an ancient dragon horde was liberated. The message that had brought them to this small town had indicated a peaceful area and to proceed with professionalism and decorum. Senior Banker Cornelius and his partner, Senior Banker Ganderwallow, were relieved when nothing greeted them except some smiling humans and a small village.

The only possible threat in the area came from the presence of the local Butcher seated at a table nearby. But the man was known for being polite and non-violent; you could see it in his aura. The large man nodded to them, and the fae enchantress with him waved politely. The strike team from the Royal Vault proceeded to the bank and greeted Banker Coppertwist, accepting the traditional cups of strong tea.

"Thank you for coming, gentlemen and your highness; I have a unique situation and need safe transport of multiple legendary artifacts to His Majesty's Vaults."

Senior Banker Cornelius looked at the artifacts and turned to his partner. "We're going to need a bigger bank."

Visit and read more novel to help us update chapter quickly. Thank you so much!