The Butcher of Gadobhra

The day had been long, and the crew were tired but in high spirits. The light that trickled down from Skye and up from Fyre was fading. The crew ate their dinner, with several retellings of the fight on the Conquest and the other battles the crew had taken part in. A full flagon of rum for each crew member was poured out for the enjoyment of everyone.

The shake-down cruise of the Splinter had been judged successful. Chains had been moved to adjust the sails. Cargo had been shifted around to change the balance of the ship. Overall, the captain was pleased, and there were no glaring problems that posed a danger to the vessel. As dusk deepened into night, Woodrat had Ozzy bring down the huge, glowing treasure chest to the main deck.

Captain Woodrat walked over to the chest, sat on one end, and took a sip of his rum. "For some of you, this will be your first chest. Not all fights are so successful, and few will result in a chest. Most will leave you dead or adrift. But if the gods smile and luck is with you, you'll see a few treasure chests in your lifetime. Say some prayers to the god you are closest to, thanking them for keeping you alive to open this one."

One by one, he called up the crew to open the chest; Telling them to reach in and bring out what they found. Wondrous items were bestowed on each person. The three newest members went first, gaining a scaled, shimmering tunic, stylish magical boots, and an enchanted harpoon.

Siren-crafted Scaled Breastplate

(Created by the sirens living in the Golden Cove. Soft, supple sealskin has been adorned with scales carved from shells and ivory to create a shimmering tunic that protects from injury. It allows its wearer to swim through the smoke as easily as a Siren.

Protection is equal to an Armored Hull.)

Murdock's Sharkskin Boots of Swift Movement. (Stylish and well-fitting, these grey leather buccaneer's boots increase your speed when climbing, swimming, or running by +50%. In addition, your feet will never slip on a deck or chain.)

Harpoon of the Mighty Quinn (First used by Quinn the Eskimo and passed down through the generations from one shark hunter to another. This enchanted weapon does double damage when thrown and returns when called.)

Butterbelly pulled out a large brush on a four-foot-long handle and a shiny metal bucket with a lid on it. He stared at them for a moment and then whistled loud and long.

Goatbristle andMjorlbotte the Overflowing.

(Carved from a branch of Yggdrasil with hairs taken from the tails of Thor's goats, this large brushevenly coats even the most enormous beast with tasty sauce in only a swipe or two, and ensures that the meat cooks evenly for even the worst chef. Crafted by the dwarf artisan, Skemmi six-thumbs, it has been sought after by chefs from Muspelheim to Asgard. It is often seen in the company of Skemmi's other incredible creation, a sauce bucket that, once filled, will never run short of its current contents. Rumor says that Skemmi constructed the bucket from scraps of Uru left over from making a famous hammer.)

The firewalker sniffed the bucket and smiled. "Nineteen-spice bear grease, or I'm a beardless dwarf. I'll never fill it with anything else. You are all in for a treat as soon as we catch something big enough."

Derrick approached the chest cautiously, encouraged by Ozzy. He reached in and pulled out a long, thin sword that he brandished about effortlessly.

Silverswift

(Presented to Lord Peerson by the Queens after the battle of Nekbramsa, this sword is swift and sharp as the cold winds it was forged from. It carries the runes of Double-Striking, and Ever-Sharp.)

The lookout tossed it in the air and caught it, the blade moving in the air back to his hand. "Like something out of a legend!"

Maria smiled wryly at that. "It should be; we killed a legend to get it. Let's see what the box has for me." She pulled out a pair of silvery-blue metal forearm guards. She put them on immediately, a sad smile on her face, and then retired to her cabin, saying she needed some time to think.

Bracers of Liberty Unrestrained

(More than just protection in a duel, these unbreakable armguards prevent the wearer from being frozen, tied, webbed, restrained, or bound in any way. Even magical spells such as Gaes will slide harmless off the wearer. If held within a jail, all doors will open to them.)

Woodrat looked after her, then turned back to the crew. "Time for you to grab some swag, First Mate."

Ozzy took his turn, wishing he could trade the treasure for a ticket home. Instead, he pulled out a matched set of flensing axes. They were larger and much heavier than the pair that Woodrat had made for him. Each one had to weigh at least forty pounds. The handles were made of thick bones, nearly black with imbued smoke and carved to perfectly fit his hands. The blades were of dark metal and edges were razor sharp. They showed heavy use but were in excellent shape. Just holding them made him want to butcher something. They were brutal, heavy weapons, closer to cleavers than axes. He hefted one in each hand, swinging them around experimentally.

Gitsplitter's Axes

The Conquest sailed to many places that were not on any map. One of those was a strange island inhabited by a green-skinned race who varied in size from two-foot tall underlings to massive brutes over eight feet in height. They could be seen on the beaches each night, carving up giant beasts and roasting them on spits. Peerson used a Kraken Lure to bring a behemoth from the deep and killed it in front of the natives with the ballistae from the Conquest. Impressed, the natives agreed to trade the Kraken carcass for wood from the strange forests on the island. When the last boat left, one of the largest brutes strode forward and stood in the boat, intending to sail with the Conquest. Lord Peerson welcomed him aboard. Gitsplitter, as he was called, never learned more than a dozen words and mostly communicated through grunts and violence. Lord Peerson declared him to be a perfect mate. He was first to board an enemy ship, first to throw a punch in any tavern, and delighted in butchering and cooking any creature brought up from the depths. His only possessions were a fine set of flensing axes that he had brought from his home island.

Ozzy swung the weapons in the air, getting a feel for them. They were far superior to the wooden flensing hatchets he used now, and the heaviness didn't bother him at all. If anything, the weight of the weapons let him use more of his strength. He could see a glow of magic on them, but no details, his minimal skill in sensing magical auras not up to the level of the axes. "Yeah, these will do nicely. Time for the grand finale. Let's see what the captain gets."

Woodrat bowed to the crew and strutted to the chest. He reached deep inside and felt around before kneeling to put his arm all the way in before finding some small item. He pulled out a box that fit into the palm of his hand. Carefully, he opened the box.

Lord Peerson's 2nd best cufflinks.

These non-magical cufflinks are made of silver with tiny pearls set as decorations. Good enough for formal dress and cheap enough to have several sets.

Woodrat got an odd look on his face before smiling broadly. "A captain can't have too much fancy jewelry, can he?" Then he took the chest and upended it, scattering a mountainous pile of golden shell coins and pearls onto the deck. "And I'm sure no one will be averse to taking a gander at his Lordship's treasure, complete with its own guardian."

The crew stared in awe at the treasure Woodrat had casually tossed to the deck. On top of the pile was a black skull with glowing green eyes that seemed to look at each of them. Woodrat put his hand on the head. "As captain, I authorize shares of treasure, either 100 golden shells or 100 small pearls, as one share. Shares to be taken now if you wish or left guarded in the Deadman's Chests."

Even one share was a large amount of wealth to your average seaman and would let them live for a month on cheap beer and bread. Most of the crew would later ask Woodrat to put their treasure away for safekeeping, but the sheer joy of playing with so much gold was intoxicating. Each of the crew from Butterbelly's boat got one share. Derrick received two since he had recently been promoted to mate. Butterbelly and Mariah received three. Mariah because she was navigator and Butterbelly as mate of more than three years service and now cook. Mariah was awarded one further share because of the part she had taken in the battle.

As Captain of the Splinter, Woodrat would take seven shares and Ozzy six as the first mate with the rank of captain. Woodrat also awarded himself and Ozzy two shares each for their major contribution to the engagement. "That's eight shares you have coming to you, well earned."

Ozzy picked out a broach with a clear jewel filled with roiling smoke that looked like waves on the sea, a set of pearl and diamond earrings, and two rings set with giant, blood-red rubies with a hint of fire inside. "What do you think the value of these would be, oh captain, my captain?"

Before Woodrat could say anything, the skull on the pile said in a chilling voice. "Those baubles will cost you seven of your shares and 57 small pearls, besides." The eyes peered at the crew, looking at each in turn. "And yes, I'm counting." The crew immediately recounted what they had taken, fixing any small errors. Ozzy took the jewelry and counted out another 43 pearls before using his tattoo to bring out his small treasure chest and fill it with his loot.

There was still a large number of coins left in the pile. Woodrat rapped on the skull. "Put the rest away, would you, lad? Skull? Skully? Yes, I think your new name is Skully." The skull rolled its glowing eyes and complied. Skull and coins flew back inside the chest, which righted itself and became another Deadman's Chest. "You can place this one next to our old chest, Mr. Ozzy, on the poop deck beside the ship's wheel. Ozzy sketched a salute and picked up the much lighter chest. Once he set it down, he couldn't move it again.

Woodrat retired to his cabin. Ozzy was off duty soon, with Butterbelly holding the watch with one of the other crew. For now, the butcher sat down with the rest of the crew, listening to them talk. Their excitement was high. All believed they were sailing with a lucky captain. He might be a bit odd, but no one could claim he didn't share his loot with his crew. They looked forward to what might happen next. One by one, those off duty went to their hammocks and went to sleep. Soon it was just the lookout and Butterbelly on watch.

The butcher pointed at the metal bucket and brush. "You seem happy with those. Hopefully, we'll catch something soon. Never thought I'd be anxious for the attack of a giant shark or kraken."

The giant laughed. "Yes, I'm of the same mind. And happy? I'm still dazed. It is one thing to talk about legends and another to call them your own. When I return to my home, it will be to the acclaim of my tribe. They probably won't let me leave the kitchen for a decade. I have been content to wander the Smoke, but now? Now I think of returning to Muspelheim and opening my own feast hall. I'll need to find a stout wife with a stern mother who will keep me in line." He looked at Ozzy. "You know, I have a sister. She's just coming up on marrying age at fifty. Legs like tree trunks and long red hair that she braids with the bones of boyfriends that she found unworthy. I could put in a good word for you. She'd like you. You can cook, and a butcher is welcome in any village. Plus, you are hard to break. That's important for anyone wanting to woo my sister."

"She sounds lovely, just lovely. But sadly, I already have a girl waiting for me back in the junction. The type you don't turn your back on if she catches you with another woman. She's delicate but a little vindictive."

Butterbelly pounded Ozzy on the back and laughed. "Those are the best type. That's how you know they love you! You should bring her along to Muspelheim and marry both of them. I notice how little you sleep. You need two wives to keep you busy doing your work. You know what they say: 'A lazy husband is Loki's tool.' If all the menfolk had good wives, Ragnarok wouldn't happen so often."

Ozzy nodded. "I'll keep that in mind. But for now, I think I'll get some of that sleep I don't get much of."

The giant clapped him on the shoulder again. "Sleep well, and tomorrow we can see what monster we can catch."

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