Chapter 8
Though it was not specifically stated, it was clear what the ‘reason’ was. If the ‘conditions’ to maintain this marriage disappeared…then there would be no reason to have a woman like me as the duke’s wife. It would be better to have a beautiful and graceful lady from a noble family with high status as his wife.
Then again, no matter how hard I tried, there was only one answer. His health.
‘If Camilla asks me to divorce him first…’ In other words, if I get divorced without any cause attributable to me, this contract will be nullified naturally. I won’t get more money, but at least I won’t have to pay back anything. No, it would actually turn out better.
[ If the contract is terminated by ‘A’s’ will, ‘A’ shall pay half of the down payment as compensation to ‘B’. ]
There was also a quite favorable clause. Although it was difficult to find this clause due to its small font, it was clearly written in the mutual contract that Camilla agreed with me anyway.
Among those many unfair clauses, this was the only clause that was favorable to me. I would surely make the best use out of it…though the provision of ‘A’s will’ was quite large.
“So, actually, I’m here to talk to you about something.” I said in a solemn voice.
“……talk about something?”
“Yes.”
“What do you want to talk about?” Camilla looked at me with suspicious eyes.
Did I just speak too solemnly? Camilla was giving a look of, ‘What are you up to now?’ to me.
Facing that gaze, I took a breath. One, two, three.
“From now on, I want to take care of my husband.”
I said it. Finally, I said it. Oh my God, I really said it. Even after I managed to say it, I was all choked up and shrank away from her.
Thump. Thump. The sound of my fast heartbeat caused my ears to feel tingles.
“What does that mean?” Camilla stared at me with a sharp look.
“I think I don’t know much about Amoide.”
“You don’t know? About what?” Camilla tilted her head and frowned.
Seeing that, I felt my heart beating faster.
‘I need to stay calm.’ I repeated inwardly as if I was casting a spell. I can’t back off now. Never.
“Well, things like what he eats, whether he is taking a walk or not, when did he usually have seizures… and so on.”
“Why are you suddenly curious about those things?” Camilla’s look at me was full of suspicion.
“I’ve been leaving the duty to care about his health completely to mother and Raymond. All I did was cry beside him.”
Camilla’s expression had a mix of surprise and incredulity as if she heard me talking about something weird. “So?”
“I want to manage all those things.”
“You?”
This time, too, she looked like she wanted to say “How dare you!”, but she expressed it in a more refined way.
“I want to take care of Amoide’s health myself.”
“What did you say?” Camilla’s eyes were wide opened, but I went on regardless.
“He is……my husband.” Somehow, my cheeks felt hot. It took a lot of courage to say ‘my husband’ with my own mouth, though they weren’t empty words. Husband, my husband. Selena’s husband.
“Husband?” Camilla only snorted at my answer as if she was dumbfounded. “Don’t do anything useless. Just focus on your duty. Raymond is already taking care of Amoide’s health well. I don’t know what wind is blowing, but don’t forget your duty. Your duty is……”
( T/N: ‘what wind is blowing’ is Korean way of saying ‘why do you suddenly think/act like that’ )
“Giving birth to a healthy successor.”
“I’m glad you didn’t forget.”
Despite her sarcastic tone, I replied with a smile. “Of course, that’s why I’m doing this.”
“Then just focus on getting pregnant. You’ve been taking the medication that Raymond prescribed properly, right?” She asked as she leaned her back against the sofa.
“Yes.” Did I just answer her too fast? I slowly lowered my eyes again at her sharp gaze.
“You’ve been taking it on time, haven’t you?”
Why bother asking about it when you already knew everything? I sighed inwardly. It wasn’t Rona, my personal maid, but Greta, Camilla’s maid, who had been bringing the medicine to me. She would bring it three times per day and hold it out in front of me.
In addition, on the room sharing days, Greta would bring another bottle of medicine claimed to be good for conception. And she would stay for a while to watch me drink every drop of the medicine. Every time she came, I would naturally look at Greta’s countenance due to blatant surveillance.
“But I wonder if the medicine really works.”
Camilla frowned her brows at my words. “What does that mean?”
“No, well… We can’t just unconditionally believe everything that Raymond says.”
My calm answer made Camilla’s face slightly grimmer. “Raymond is one of the best doctors. His prescription is indisputable.”
“No matter how good he is, it won’t work out.” I replied flatly with a nuance of resignation, as if I had given up.
“What do you mean?” Camilla’s expression immediately became sharp at my vague answer.
“Well… I think there might be another problem.” I swallowed my saliva once. I stuttered deliberately, fiddling with my finger at the tip of the teacup I was holding.
“Another problem?”
“What I mean is…not only the birth mother, but the health of the biological father is also very important for a smooth conception…….”
“Health of the biological father?” Camilla’s face expressed her extreme unpleasantness. Selena already knew about her son’s health before the marriage. Why did Selena suddenly bring up the subject now?
“Yes, of course, I know he is weak, but… Well, what I’m trying to say is…….” I smiled with an awkward frown.
It was at that moment that Camilla’s expression, who was staring at my face, shook greatly. “Speak clearly so I can understand.”
The white bones in Camilla’s hands on her lap became visible. She squinted her eyes as though she was thinking about something, then her eyes gradually became wider.
‘You must be angry.’ I glanced at her countenance. “Well…” I deliberately drew up my words, pretending to look at her expression. “…because Raymond doesn’t know what’s going on between husband and wife.”
Camilla’s face, which was pale, began to turn red. “He doesn’t know?” Her expression was stiff as if she had noticed something unusual as I’ve been dragging my words.
“The parties involved know best about a couple’s affair.” I said with a vague smile. “There are things that can’t be done just by the wife’s will, no matter how hard I take the medicine.”
I closed my eyes as I finished talking. Though I told her in a roundabout way, Camilla would certainly know what I mean.
“My son…no way.” The duchess’s voice was trembling faintly. “No way, don’t tell me.” Her forehead was crumpled and the teacup she held was shaking. Soon, a shocked voice filled the room. “…are you saying that he is impotent?!”
Camilla was looking at me with a face whiter than the teacup she was holding.
Oh, was it that shocking? I’ve never mentioned the word ‘impotent’ with my own mouth though.
“No way! My son is not like that! It can’t be true! It’s impossible!” Camilla screamed out loud, abandoning her usual elegance. Her response was fiercer than I thought.
“Oh no, mother, your voice is too loud.” I quickly put my index finger on my lips.
“Huh?” Suddenly, Camilla came to her senses and looked around in a hurry.
Fortunately, all the maids and servants had been sent out before the teatime. Some might be still outside the door, though.
“You can’t conceive a child, you mean…there could be a problem with Amoide?” Camilla took a deep breath and asked.
I smiled meaningfully.
For a moment, Camilla’s eyes were shaking as if there was an earthquake. “That can’t be true. Raymond is Amoide’s doctor. He never said that there’s a problem with Amoide’s…”
Camilla’s trust in Raymond was beyond my imagination. It was probably because he inherited his family profession and became the doctor for Efret family, like the previous generations. There was a strong belief that if it weren’t for Raymond, Amoide would not be in this world by now. Because Raymond had been saving Amoide as he was on verge of death several times.
Camilla was clearly trying to maintain her composure.
So, I added with a gentle smile again. “How could Raymond possibly know about that?”
“……”
“I’m his wife, mother.” I calmly stated the reality.
“……”
“Think about it, I’ve been on medication for the whole time, following Raymond’s prescription and spent the night with him on the recommended days. Nevertheless, there have been no signs so far…”
“There must be something wrong with your body.” Camilla said flatly. “I heard you just collapsed. Isn’t it strange that you suddenly collapsed when you’re young and healthy?” Camilla’s eyes were twinkling with hope. It was a desperate attempt to deny the reality.
Then… I can’t lose either. “I was just nervous. I was so shocked that Amoide collapsed.”
“Amoide had collapsed several times before and yet, you were only extremely shocked this time…”
“Mother almost collapsed as well this time. It’s possible to collapse when people are extremely shocked.”
Uncomfortable at my calm words, Camilla’s face hardened.
“It’s hard to watch a sick person enduring the pain for a long time. Though it couldn’t be compared to mother, I’ve been watching Amoide suffering too.”
“……”
At that moment, Camilla’s eyes shook momentarily.
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