49 “Annual Banquet” (2)

Eleanora’s pov ~

Maria, Jennie and the other maids started to put some makeups on my face to cover up my pale face and got me all dress up.

As the crown prince’s fiancee, I had to enter with him at the ceremony today, so all the housemaids of my house were eager to get me dolled up as best they could.

Of course, I wasn’t interested at all.

I looked into the mirror and kept staring at myself. I had always wore darker coloured dresses after i turned sixteen, in my last life.

So, this light blue coloured dress, which was made in a matching pare with the crown prince; looked weird on me.

At least i thought so. This light blue coloured dress reminded me of the white shabby dress that i had worn in my trial grounds.

But i can’t always keep remembering this and fear him. He can’t kill me anymore in this lifetime.

I will never become the empress, who will get abandoned and eventually killed in the end.

.....

No matter how the fate is written, i will change them.

I know, this Cathain has done nothing wrong yet, but that doesn’t mean he won’t do in the future.

I will fully use my power, because i don’t love him anymore in this lifetime. There is nothing to be afraid of. I can do this.

After Liana went back last night, i thought a lot about my present life. Why am i trying so hard to escape him?

Why do i still feel so scared of him, just like the past?

It was because, i couldn’t let go of my past with him. I couldn’t let go of my obsession with my father and him. I couldn’t let go of my love and hatred for him.

I said, i will change my destiny. But can i really do it when am still holding into the past? Holding into my father’s sudden wramth towards me?

I will save myself this time. I will help the people and speak of my mind this time. I will achieve my dreams.

I can only escape the past when i won’t expect anything from anyone in this life. If i can’t escape, then i will face it.

Did i really thought, i could escape after being confirmed as the lady of the prophecy?

I wasn’t in clear head this days. But when i thought about it clearly, there was many loopholes.

Cathain never gave me a proper reason for hating me, Jena suddenly appeared out of nowhere.

Emperor Valerian died suddenly, Cathain become more aggressive and my unreasonable obsession with him grew day by day, my two misscarriages that couldn’t be explained properly.

The empress, living in the abandoned palace; which no one even bothered to demand an explanation or something?

Father suddenly losing his mind to attack cathain, Jena become Jennifer Raven and then a empress’s execution just because of a queen’s misscarriage?

There is too many missing pieces. I was only focused on living, escaping. But i will die for sure again, if i can’t piece them together.

Also, i need to cheak out about the story of saintess Ariande. I think this also have something to do with this.

I was afraid of the arrival of today’s ceremony until yesterday, but I wasn’t scared anymore.

Perhaps, it’s because I felt empty and more clear headed now.

I wouldn’t care even if things went wrong. Now that I finally regained my consciousness fully; It’s my turn to show them what am capable of.

If i can bring prosperity to this empire, i can even lead it to destruction.

Looking at me not complaining at all even when they tightened the corset around my waist and put on a pannier to make my skirt look abundant, the maids whispered among themselves, but I didn’t care.

I just moved my body as they led me. Even after I examined my outfit for the last time, I felt like I was floating in my dreams until I got in the carriage.

‘I won’t escape anymore, Rather, i will face it!’

‘Before your hands choke me, i will cut them.’

“Are you okay, lady? You do look pale.”

Sir Edmund spoke with a worried look and when I got out of the wagon with the royal knight’s help with people around me whispering about me, I didn’t care because, they will always whisper, no matter what i do.

I gave Sir Edmund a reassurance smile, before i started to walk, ignoring those whispers around me and finally reached the banquet halls entrance.

He was wearing a gracefully shining, white suit with a light blue robe, which had the same matching decoration design as my dress. Even the simple white ribbon in my dress was the same as his.

His black hair was neatly combed up, making his facial features more sharp and prominent. His red eyes looked up and stared at my blue eyes, the moment he sensed my presence.

Unlike before, his eyes was somewhat clear and surprised after he saw me today. He turned his body to face me and seemed like he was waiting for me.

“I, Eleanora Ariande Dalton, am honored to greet you, the Little Sun of the empire.”

“You... okay, let’s go.”

Even though he, who greeted me politely for the first time in this lifetime was my partner, I felt he was acting strange.

I didn’t like his dreamlike voice or his surprised look, that didn’t contained hatred or disgust anymore.

He frowned, when i did my greeting with an expressionless look.

He tried to say something but then shake his head to not say, and reached out for my hands. I put my hand lightly on his cold hand and left the waiting room.

‘Instead of escaping, i need to take advantage of things beside me now.’

Before entering, I slightly adjusted my dress ribbon and straightened up, his gaze was still on me. I felt uncomfortable, so i looked up at him and he coughed lightly.

After clearing his throat, the chief attendant shouted loudly.

“The little Sun of the empire, Crown Prince Cathain De Valerian Valentino and the Moon of the empire, Eleanora Ariande La Dalton, are entering the hall!”

The door slowly opened. I smiled consciously with my back straight. Slowly moving, I saw nobles bowing to show their manners to the next emperor.

The same people, wearing the same dress as i remembered them wearing in the past. The same people who shouted in joy, the moment i was executed along with my child.

‘Just wait and watch, how i make your lives a living hell.’

As I walked along the red carpet, I stopped in front of the platform and bowed to His Majesty sitting on the throne.

“I’m honored to see you, Your Majesty.”

“I’m honored to see the emperor, the Sun of the empire.”

“Come on, Crown Prince and Princess. Raise your heads.”

When he and I showed due manners to the emperor, he ordered the nobles still bowing to him to raise their bodies.

Everyone fixed their eyes on the emperor, when he started to speak.

“Today is the 1746th year of our empires national founding day. So, let’s start the banquet and enjoy yourself.”

The emperor said and gave his glass to give us a toast. Following him, we all did the same.

As i took the glass to my lips, i couldn’t help but silently laugh a little.

If in my last life, he didn’t broke the news of her being pregnant; maybe i would drink with him at that time with a smiling and happy face, who was happy just by standing with him...

...a pathetic fool who was obsessed with him.

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