Return of the Runebound Professor

“You know, that’s a real tempting offer, but I’m afraid I’m going to have to pass on it,” Noah said, watching the deadly demon warily. “I’m unfortunately otherwise engaged. No need for a rain check.”

“I insist,” the woman said. She ran a hand down the flat side of her axe, leaving a clean streak in the blood coating its surface. “I will not accept your answer.”

“Ah. We can’t be having that.” Noah’s eyes narrowed. He extended his senses to brush across the demon, trying to get a feel for how far her strength truly went. “When somebody says no, it means no. You might need some lessons in consent.”

If the demon noticed his domain, she did nothing to address it. Cold, hungry energy emanated from her body like wisps of icy fog rolling across Noah’s mind. She was strong. Much stronger than the four that she’d cut down moments ago — though that really shouldn’t have been much of a surprise.

Rank 5. Maybe Rank 6? I don’t know. She’s by far the most powerful demon we’ve met in the Damned Plains other than Yoru, though. I can’t take any risks with her. She has to die.

The demon spun her axe around and drove it into the ground with enough force to crack the stone at her feet. Her gaze flicked down. They locked on the corpses splattered across the ground. Her eyes widened and a hand shot to her mouth.

“Oh, no. Oh, no, no. I did it again.” The demon’s voice raised in pitch and she took a step back, her gray features losing a shade of color.

Noah and Moxie exchanged a glance. It didn’t take a genius to tell that the woman’s head might have had more marbles than brain matter.

“Yes, you did,” Noah said slowly, not entirely sure what it was that she’d done. He didn’t get the feeling her distress was because she’d just slaughtered four demons in cold blood — not unless she had two entirely different personalities trapped in her head.

“I took your prey,” the woman said, pulling at her hair and letting out a groan. “Oh, no. I got to excited. I interfered with the brush.”

Yup. She’s batshit insane. Of course she is.

Moxie’s fingers twitched at her sides. Noah could practically see the gears turning in her head. He was pretty sure she was a few seconds away from sending her plants out in hopes of getting a surprise attack on the madwoman. Noah caught her gaze and shook his head slightly.

The demon might have been insane, but she was blindingly fast and powerful. He needed her attention focused entirely on him. If she went after Moxie, Noah wasn’t confident he’d be able to interfere in time to stop her.

“You also left a mess,” Lee said. “Wasting food is bad.”

The blood-splattered demon glanced back to the corpses. Her features screwed up and she started to pace back and forth, wringing her hands together. “This vile filth isn’t worth eating. I would not sully my lips with their flesh.”

“You… already did,” Noah said.

The woman ground to a halt. She let out another groan and pulled at her hair again. Then she grabbed her axe and ripped it from the ground, pointing it straight at Noah. He stepped to the side. The weapon followed him. He stepped back to where he’d been standing again.

“Would you stop that?” the demon exclaimed, adjusting her aim once more.

Maybe I can just… out-crazy her.

“No,” Noah said, stepping to the side again. He drank energy from his runes, gathering it into his palms. “I’ve got a whole lot more where this came from, too. If you know what’s good for you, leave. I can side-step all day.”

The demon ground her teeth and slammed her axe into the ground. Rocks shattered beneath its blade and peppered down all around her. “Do not make a mockery of me!”

“Alright, alright,” Noah said. He came to a stop and lifted his hands into the air, palms facing the demon. “Sorry.”

He released the magic. The air shattered as a thick bolt of lightning screamed through it, slamming straight into the demons’ face with a deafening crack. It snapped her neck back and sent her tumbling across the ground. The axe flew from her grip and skidded across the stone beside her.

They both came to a stop at the edge of the square. Thick black smoke rose up from the demon’s face. Her body twitched as arcs of electricity danced out from her and sank into the ground.

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Noah let his hands lower. Moxie stared at him. He shrugged.

“What?”

“That was cheap.”

“Really? You’re on her side now? There were no rules.” Noah gathered magic again and sent a second blast of lightning into the demoness’ body. He wasn’t optimistic enough to believe that a single bolt would be enough to kill a Rank 5, and he had no plans of sitting around while the demon—

She sat up.

“Excruciating,” the demoness breathed, wiping soot from her face. Aside from a small scorch mark on her cheek, she was completely uninjured. She rose to her feet and rolled her neck. “Do it again.”

Noah’s eye twitched. “If you stand right there, I’d be more than willing to oblige you.”

“I’d prefer to make things more… exciting. I am known as Axil. If you will not give me the honor of witnessing your canvas, then I will take the choice from you,” the demoness said. She lifted her hand. The axe leapt from its spot on the ground and slammed into her grip.

Her eyes flicked to Moxie.

And, in that moment, Noah’s willingness to play games with the demon evaporated.

He slammed power into the Rune of Self embedded in his soul. His foot slammed into the ground, cracking the stone beneath it as he blurred into motion. The distance between him and Axil evaporated.

His fist slammed into her cheek with enough force to snap her head to the side. The demon spun with the blow. Her foot whipped up between his legs. Noah’s free hand shot down, driving into her ankle. A shudder raced down his arm from the impact, but he stopped the strike.

Axil’s elbow streaked for his face in a blur. Noah leaned back, controlling every muscle in his back perfectly to let the strike slip just past his nose. He drove his knee up into Axil’s stomach.

She doubled over. Brilliant white power crackled between Noah’s fingertips and he clapped his hands down on the demon’s shoulders. She twisted from his grip, but not fast enough to avoid his magic.

Noah unleashed Crumbling Space. White cracks bore into her skin like twisting worms and the air collapsed upon itself. Bone shattered and blood sprayed as both of the demon’s arms crunched like pressurized soda cans.

The axe slipped from her grip and Noah caught it with a hand, flinging it across the square. His knee shot up and drove into Axil’s face. Her nose crunched beneath it and snapped back. She stumbled backward — and Noah froze. There was only one emotion on Axil’s face.

Ecstasy.

“More,” Axil rasped. Her bones popped and her warped arms twisted. They snapped back into place and she rolled her shoulders as a shudder ran down her back. Her nose unbroke itself and she wiped the blood from her features with the back of a hand, licking it clean.

She extended a hand to the fallen axe and it leapt like a well-trained dog, flying back to her hands. Blood soaked into Axil’s white robes. The wounds on her body hadn’t sealed, but the majority of the damage had been undone.

Noah obliged her. He didn’t exactly like the idea of obliging the insane demoness, but when the alternative was putting Moxie or Lee in her sights, he wasn’t about to let up.

Bones crunched beneath his fists. Blood sprayed across the ground and Crumbling Space carved through Axil’s flesh. The demoness took every single blow, stumbling back until Noah had her pinned against the wall with his flurry of attacks.

No matter how hard Noah struck her, her body fixed itself just moments later. The delight in Axil’s features started to fade. Her nose crunched again beneath his fists, and when he pulled back again, her expression was flat and cold.

“This is not—”

Noah’s fist slammed into her mouth, crushing several teeth.

“What I—”

His elbow struck the side of Axil’s temple and caved the bone in, snapping her head to the side.

“Witnessed.”

Axil’s head twisted back to look at Noah. Her skull fixed itself, her jaw clenched. They locked eyes.

“You are disappointing,” Axil said. She spat blood onto his face.

The bow of Noah’s violin materialized in his hands. He flicked it across Axil’s throat. Its razor-sharp thread passed through her neck like there was nothing in its way. Axil’s lips parted, a flicker of surprise passing through her eyes.

Then her head pitched forward, rolling from her shoulders and splattering to the ground at Noah’s feet. He wiped her spit from his cheek and took a step back. His fists and chest were stained red, and his face-wrappings were soaked.

Noah’s chest rose and fell with heavy, ragged breaths. For several seconds he stood still and watched Axil’s corpse.

It didn’t move.

He pulled the ruined wrappings off his face and threw them to the ground where they landed with a wet, disgusting squelch. They looked like he’d dipped them in a bucket of red paint. Noah shook his head.

He turned back to Moxie and Lee.

The axe on the ground rattled.

It blurred toward him. Noah’s eyes widened and he dismissed the violin bow. He slammed his hands together, stopping the weapon an inch before it could bury itself in his skull. His muscles burned as it fought against him.

With a roar, Noah thrust the weapon to the side. It streaked through the air and slammed into a building at the side of the market, shattering the stone and disappearing within it. Noah spun back to Axil.

Her headless corpse rose. She grabbed her head and set it back in place. Muscle rippled in her neck and blood trickled down the sides of the seam as it knit itself closed. Axil’s eyes fluttered and she cracked her neck, letting out a shuddering breath.

“That,” Axil said, her tongue running along her lips. “Was better. But it was not enough, Spider. You have still disappointed me. Is that all you have to offer? Have you deceived my sight?”

“You know what? Now I know why I pissed all those people off,” Noah said. “Stay dead, you creepy fucker.”

“Your true canvas must be concealed. Hidden,” Axil mused, rolling the words in her mouth like she were tasting them. Her eyes narrowed, locking in on Noah like a homing missile. “I will expose it. I am going to kill you now, Spider. Please endeavor to make your death enjoyable.”

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