Return of the Runebound Professor

“Hold on there,” Noah said, raising his hands defensively. The longer he kept the demon talking, the more time he’d have to actually figure a way to get out of this mess. “Shouldn’t you be grateful or something? It’s not like I chose to do anything to you. That was the moron who originally had this body and, as you’re aware, he’s dead. I’m a victim too.”

“A victim that has been very much enjoying all the extra room in his soul that he stole from me,” the demon growled. “What, did you think your soul was naturally that large? You consumed mine! I can’t even begin to think about how much damage you’ve done. Hundreds of years of work, ripped away and consumed by a novice that doesn’t even know what Runes are.”

Well, that explains that. I was wondering why my soul was so large. Today really is one of answers.

“The same novice that healed you,” Noah pointed out. “There’s no reason for us to be enemies, is there? It’s not like I had any way to know that you were in my mind.”

The demon’s eyes narrowed and it took a step toward Noah, running a glowing tongue along its sharp teeth. “I don’t care if you knew or not. I’m not going to sit around and suffer months of torture in exchange for nothing. I’ll be taking back what you took from me – and with debt.”

Noah reached for his Runes while they spoke. Despite what he said, he didn’t have any delusions that the demon was going to work together with him or become friends. He was pretty sure that only one of them was going to be leaving this room – and judging by how quickly Evergreen had gotten taken out, the scales weren’t tipped in his favor.

But, to Noah’s surprise, his mind brushed across something else. There was a ripple – a wrinkle – in his soul. It was subtle, but stuck out more than enough to catch his attention. It vaguely reminded him of a hangnail.

The hell is this?

Noah sent a mental tendril into it. He felt his soul shift, and Noah’s heart dropped into his stomach at the chilling sensation that raced throughout his entire body. At the same time, the demon drew in a sharp gasp.

“What are you doing?” the demon hissed. Noah saw it tense – if it actually moved, there wouldn’t be time for him to try anything else. It was fast. Faster than Noah’s eyes, but not as fast as his thoughts.

He yanked on the strange wrinkle. The demon let out a furious scream, stumbling mid dash. Its hands flailed and it tripped over Noah’s chair crashing to the ground with a series of curses.

It rolled to the side, leaping back upright.

Noah wrapped his mind even further around the wrinkle, isolating it and giving it another sharp tug. The demon let out a furious scream and motes of flame tore away from its body, flowing back into Noah’s mouth before he could stop them.

“Wait. Stop!” the demon snarled. “Stop. Don’t.”

Heat still tingled in Noah’s throat, but it didn’t feel like the fire had hurt him. He wrapped his mind even more around the wrinkle.

“Why?” Noah asked. “You were about to kill me. We’re enemies, aren’t we?”

“You rip that thread free and your whole soul will unravel, sending me with it into oblivion. Don’t kill us both, you damned fool.”

Noah raised an eyebrow. He glanced at Lee out of the corner of one eye. “Is that a thing?”

Lee swallowed heavily, hiding partially behind Noah to avoid making eye contact with the demon. “I don’t know. Maybe? I’ve never heard of something like this happening before.”

“Moxie?”

“No idea,” Moxie said. She edged closer to Evergreen, then thought better off it and took a step back. Her eyes were locked on the staff lying on the ground on the far side of the room. “It’s possible, but unlikely. I feel like you would have noticed if your soul was so abnormally large to the point where you could be mistakenly housing a Rank 5 demon. I know it’s large, but was it that big?”

Noah cleared his throat. “Let’s put some specifics on that. How big is big?”

“How quickly do you normally heal from soul damage?”

“If I don’t do anything? A few days.”

“A few–” Moxie choked, tearing her eyes away from the staff and looking at Noah in disbelief. “Days? What kind of monster are you?”

“One that was leeching off my soul,” the demon said. It shifted and Noah wrapped his mind around the strand, giving it a gentle tug. It let out a curse and dropped to the ground, raising its hands into the air. “Stop that, you crazed bastard. We’ll both slip into oblivion. You understand that, don’t you?”

“Why should I trust you?” Noah asked. “For all I know, cutting this might just pull you out of my soul and leave me with everything. It’s not like you’ve got anybody that can vouch for you, and you were about an instant from ripping my throat out. How’s that any different?”

“Killing each other isn’t the same as tearing our souls apart, imbecile” the demon snapped. “That’s just normal death. Big difference. In one, I survive. In the other, I don’t.”

“Wow. Really motivating me to trust you,” Noah said dryly.

“It should be. All I’m concerned with is my own life – you’re irrelevant to me. That should mean it’s easy for you to tell when I’m lying or not.”

Noah opened his mouth, then closed it again. The demon actually had a point – which was probably a bad thing. There was only one demon whose opinion Noah ever wanted to be considering, and that was Lee.

“Right,” Noah said. “So what do you propose? Because all you’ve done is make me lean toward killing you normally.”

The demon burst into laughter. “You know, even if I wasn’t pushing and prodding your your mind a little bit, you would have made a great demon. But one thing you’ve been consistently terrible at is sizing up your opponent. There is absolutely nothing you – or any of your companions, can do to me.”

Noah raised an eyebrow. “You sure about that?”

“Your Master Runes are powerful,” the demon admitted. “But they can’t kill me. Do you really think a Rank 3 can defeat a high Rank 5, even with Sunder? Go ahead. Try it. Just be careful. Let go of your control on that bond between us and I’ll rip your head from your shoulders.”

“You don’t know me at all if you think that would give me even the slightest pause,” Noah drawled, baring his teeth in a grin.

“And your companions?”

Noah’s grin vanished.

“Moxie, can you stab him with a vine or something?”

The demon raised its arms out, inviting the blow. Moxie didn’t need to be told twice. A thorned brown vine shot out from her pant leg, coiling across the floor and shooting straight for the demon’s throat.

Before it could even grow close, the vine evaporated. Tiny motes of it drifted away, fluttering to the ground like ash. Moxie pressed her lips together.

“I can’t get through its domain. The demon is right – I literally couldn’t attack it, even if I wanted to.”

“You could punch it,” Lee whispered.

“Feel free to try,” the demon said, easily picking up on her words. “Get close enough and I’ll rip you to shreds before Noah can stop me. You’re welcome to keep trying to sling magic in my direction, though.”

Noah’s hands clenched at his sides as he dug through his head, trying to think of a way to get out of this. If Moxie and Lee didn’t have a way to attack, then that left Evergreen – but there was an equal chance she’d try to kill him as well.

Probably more than equal, honestly. I can’t attack myself or I risk losing my hold on the thing binding us together. If that’s the case… I’m more partial to killing both of us. One death is better than three.

The demons’ eyes widened. “Stop that! You absolute moron, don’t you even think about it.”

“You can read my thoughts? That’s completely unfair.”

“I’m in your mind, you suicidal psychopath. Stop killing yourself in response to every single problem you have!” The demon exclaimed.

“Seriously? He was going to kill himself again?” Moxie asked, glaring at Noah.

“No I wasn’t,” Noah protested. He pointed at the demon. “I was going to call its bluff and yank it out of my soul. Either it was lying and we win, or both me and the demon die and the two of you live.”

“Absolutely not,” Lee, Moxie, and the demon chorused. Lee and Moxie glared at the demon, who glared back at all of them.

“What the hell are we meant to do, then?” Noah asked. “I’m not letting it kill all of us.”

“We’re working on it. No killing yourself.” Moxie crossed her arms. “I could go find an Enforcer?”

“They’d kill Noah,” the demon said flatly. “They’d try kill me too, I guess, but if I’m going to die, then I’m ripping our soul apart from my side. I’m not going to my death on my own. Noah isn’t coming back from his soul unraveling.”

“What do you even want?” Noah asked. “Didn’t you think this might happen when you came out? Did you really just do this without any plan?”

It was the demon’s turn to look flustered. It cleared its throat. “You don’t get properly furious very often, and I was getting impatient.”

Noah’s eyes narrowed. “You called me dumb, but you’re the one that just completely blew his cover like an idiot. It looks like we’re at a complete impasse, but I’m a lot more willing to kill myself than you are.”

“That’s very established. No need to remind us, we’re all aware of your suicidal tendencies,” the demon said bitterly. “Fine. A Rune Oath, then.”

There was a flicker in the demon’s eyes, and a flicker of thought brushed against Noah’s mind. It was satisfaction – but it wasn’t his own. This was what the demon had been planning to do from the very start.

“Stop that,” the demon hissed. “Don’t probe my thoughts.”

“Why not?” Noah challenged. He tried to draw on the feeling further, pushing into the demon’s head. “You were doing it to me, weren’t you?”

There was a pop and the connection between them cut, leaving Noah unable to feel anything more of the demon’s mind.

“No Rune Oath,” Noah said flatly. “Not when that was what you were aiming for from the start.”

“So, what? We just sit here until something comes along and kills both of us? Brilliant plan.” The demon crossed its arms and raised a black eyebrow.

“No,” Noah replied with a cold smile. “You’ve said it yourself. I’m willing to die. You aren’t. That means I hold all the cards. What we’re going to do is sit here until you give up and go back into my head – and then you stay there until we figure out a solution for all this.”

“You expect me to just… give up?” the demon demanded. It flickered, rising to its feet, and Noah gave the wrinkle in his soul a warning tug. The demon cursed and took a step back. “I will not go back to being an idle passenger. I refuse.”

“If I let you free, you’re just going to slaughter people.”

“Yes.”

“You’re not even going to deny it?”

“Why would I? I’ve been so bored. You are an utterly boring mortal. If you partook in at least a few more primal desires, then maybe I’d at least have something to enjoy. But no. All you do is sit around, fight, or fiddle with your damn runes. You barely remember to eat. You don’t laze around. You don’t act on lust. You barely even murder anyone. Live a little, you boring little shit.”

“The afterlife has a way of wringing most of that out of you,” Noah said flatly. “Get back in my head. This isn’t a bargain. It’s not a deal. It’s a threat. I’ve got bigger problems than you to deal with.”

“You are sorely mistaken about that,” the demon said. It paused for a moment, then ground its teeth together. “Will you at least be a little more interesting? I can sate myself and sit around if you do something, but I might actually choose to die if you keep at things like this.”

“Like what? I’m not going to go murder a bunch of people for no reason. Aren’t monsters enough?”

“Killing to get stronger is boring. Kill for the thrill of the hunt. Revel in the slaughter.”

“No.”

The demon sighed, then nodded at Moxie and Lee. “What about having–”

“I am going to kill both of us.”

“Damned Plains,” the demon swore. “Alright. For now, I’ll play by your rules. But don’t take my surrender as a loss. You’re ready today, but if you don’t find a solution for this or figure out a way to keep me entertained, then you won’t be able to kill yourself fast enough to keep me from taking your beloved friends with us. I will take something from you, Noah Vines. I already have, even if you haven’t found it yet. The longer you push me to the side, the more I am going to take. Best find a way to solve this issue soon – or there won’t be anything left to take.”

The demon exploded into a pillar of ash and flame, swirling through the air and pouring into Noah’s mouth before he could react. It vanished an instant later, and he drew in a ragged breath.

Lee and Moxie stared at him in concern.

“I’m fine,” Noah said, swallowing. Somehow, he hadn’t gotten burned by the demon’s passing. That didn’t particularly reassure him, though. Evergreen stirred in her chair, letting out a low groan.

“I think we’ve got more imminent problems to deal with.”

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