Reject Humanity, Return to Monke
Chapter 113 - Monke And Battle Royales (24)After about two hours of standing guard in front of the tent, with Arkehus surprisingly not trying to flirt with me, both of us were dismissed from our duties and told to enjoy the rest of our day.
And that included me quickly running into my tent and sleeping like a log, away from the minotaur, who probably had it bad for my backside, and away from the other crazy Dungeon Masters who were now busy with their duties, or slacking off somewhere in the camp.
'Sheesh… What a crazy group I've gotten entangled with…' I lied on my bed, it's sturdiness not protesting at my weight with the cushion something I would've spent millions on back on Earth.
Keia and Reia, twin maids who likely have an S&M fetish respectively. Arekhus, the gay minotaur who wants to hump me. Oshurkova, the leader of the group, is swarmed with paperwork (may God bless her soul). Tanjin, a giant who I imagine to be a jokester and laidback. Shrum, a strict old mushroom who prides himself on his age. Typhial, a yandere who loved Oshurkova. Pilips, a nervous Dungeon Master who literally stutters every word or so, and finally, Catalina, the catwoman who likes to diss the harpy, Typhial.
And then, there's me, a new Dungeon Master not even a month old who was fortunate enough to join a group before some other Dungeon Masters decided to get his head as a trophy, just because they were interested in him.
Well, now they're interested because it seems that [Spatial Magic], or in other words, my inventory, is a rarely found magic skill, and that bumped my worth by several notches.
My strength and powers over flames, and lightning (I think my [Rolling Thunder] made Typhial think that I also had [Lightning Magic], which is true) were just bonuses to make sure that I could be an asset during a fight or a crisis.
'I still don't know if I can trust all of them.' I thought as I tossed and turned in bed, trying to tire out my body so I could get to sleep faster. 'Oshurkova… I'll admit, might've gained a bit of my trust, but not all of it.'
If something happens that jeopardizes my stay here in this group, and was caused by an internal member, then I am running for the hills and never looking back.
I yawned, my consciousness slowly leaving my body as I felt the warm embrace of sleep consume me.
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"So, we gonna go for our next run?" I asked Typhial, who was flapping her wings every so often with a bright smile on her face.
"But of course!" She turned to me with a look bordering on fanatical as she glared daggers. "We must not let Que- I mean, Lady Oshurkova down!"
"Careful, your thoughts are showing." I tried my best to not retort, I really did, but alas, my trolling nature deemed it unnecessary for the situation at hand.
"Gah! Erase that from your memory right this instant!" Typhial pouted as she inched ever so closely, her hand on her waist ready to pull out her weapon from the scabbard.
I was about to try and de-escalate the situation until two other figures de-escalated for us. Keia looked like the emo maid she was, while Reia was practically glowing, her distant muttering and chuckles giving me a thought to what had happened last night.
'What the fuck is wrong with twins in this world?' I had to stop myself from giving myself a migraine from too much thinking about the depravity of twins in this world. 'Please, I beg of you, whoever might be listening, let me encounter normal twins and not depraved ones!'
After the crisis in my head was averted, I looked at the maids, who were now both focusing on us, Reia's distant mutters and chuckles still not disappearing as a slight blush appeared on her face.
"Lord Jionni-la." Keia sounded off from her spot, her eyes shifting to her twin sister for a moment before focusing back on me. "Lady Oshurkova has requested a meeting with you-la. Typhial will be deployed as a scout instead of a runner-la."
"Wait, what!? No!" Typhial looked at Keia with crazed eyes, her yandere-side showing in full force as she glared at me with extreme jealousy. "Let me accompany Jionni, Lady Oshurkova must have a use for me, right? Right!?"
"Unfortunately, not right now-la." Typhial looked as if she was given the death sentence by a judge. That didn't stop her from showing me her yandere-side by giving me a death glare.
"You! You better not make Lady Oshurkova regret this!" Typhial voiced off like an enraged, angsty teen.
'Okay… What the fuck is going on…?' I looked confused at the ongoing mishap that was happening around me.
"Lord Jionni-la." Keia looked at me, more serious than ever before. The moment her words left her lips, however, Typhial began to froth at the mouth and lunged at me.
"Lady Oshurkova needs a sex mate right now-la."
I quickly thrust my hands in front of me, trying to block the incredibly fast harpy from trying to mutilate me into different pieces. She was just too fast that my dodging would have proved non-plausible.
"YOU SON OF A BITCH!" She was strong too, slightly less than mine though, but she made it up with speed.
'Holy… This harpy's strong, and she isn't even a strength build!' I had to rearrange my mind about how strong the members of this group are. 'If Typhial used her speed strategically, instead of brute force like now, I'm pretty sure I would be hard pressed to overcome the battle.'
"Hey, wait!" I voiced out my complaints, my arms burning as the strength of the harpy continued to push me. 'Come on, think… What's the best way to calm down this yandere…?'
As my mind rummaged through the options on how to best calm the harpy down, a light thud and a release of pressure on my arms made me blink in surprise.
"Please-ta. Do not make Lady Oshurkova wait-ta." Reia bowed, her hand clenched as her bright smile threatened to give me chills.
"… Alright…" Deciding to get the fuck out of dodge, I turned around and made my way towards Oshurkova's tent. 'Uh… hold on a second… Didn't Keia say she needed a sex partner right now…?'
I had to wrap my head around this sentence, but overall, swept it to the side and left that problem to future me.
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"Ah, Jionni, you came." As I entered the tent, with Shrum standing guard outside like a Royal Guard, I saw Oshurkova with black rings under her eyes. An enormous stack of paperwork threatened to slip off the table and into the ground.
"Yes." I greeted and sat down on a chair right in front of her. "I heard that you needed a sex mate?"
"… Who the fuck told you that?" Oshurkova looked pissed the moment those words left my mouth. Well then, it's time to throw them under the bus. Give me problems, will they?
"Keia did." I answered quickly, her look slowly turning into a snarl, before a sigh left her lips, and her scowl softened as she leaned back on the couch she was sitting on.
"That damned maid…" Oshurkova muttered darkly as the words that left her mouth were something not rated PG.
"Anyway, forgetting that previous statement." Oshurkova stood up, her body swaying towards me as she deftly moved around the stack of paperwork. "I summoned you here because the Dungeon Master you killed yesterday? Yeah, their leader, as well as his friend, didn't take too nicely to that."
I winced at her words,
Oshurkova took a seat beside me as she put a hand on my shoulder.
"As much as they want to kill you right now, they understand that deaths in this event are possible, but that doesn't mean they don't hold a grudge." Oshurkova shrugged as she stood back up, her hand leaving my shoulder as she traced her steps back to the stack of paperwork. "They demand his body, and they'll let this go for the time being. Otherwise, we're going to have a full-scale fight against their group."
"When do they want it?" I asked, my head tilting at the question I had.
"Tomorrow, where you killed the ogre Dungeon Master. Just expect that one of his friends might try to taunt you into fighting, so please, do not fall for their taunts."
"Noted." I replied back, a smile appearing on top of Oshurkova's face as she sat back down on the couch and glared at her mortal enemy, the ever-growing paperwork.
"Now, if you'll excuse me, these… monstrosities won't sign themselves…" Oshurkova hissed as she glared at the stack of paperwork, that continued to grow larger and larger, causing the vampire to despair at her situation.
Looking at her made me think of the future where I had to sign paperwork as well, inside an office, with a couch, and a bunch of papers…
'I need a skill that can auto-sign stuff based on my preferences and necessity.' Recording that for my mental note, I exited the tent and waved goodbye to Shrum, who didn't move whatsoever, like a Royal Guard would.
'Haaahh… More and more problems just keep on showing up… Now I'm regretting joining this event in the first place…' I sighed as I made my way back to my tent.
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