There was a strange atmosphere in the house after the results announcement. She could feel in her bones that something was not right. Today, when An Xiulan was on her way to her mom’s room, she heard some loud voices coming out of it.

“What do you mean by this, Zhaolin?” An Xiulan shouted over the phone. “How can you do this? You know Xiulan has yet to recover.”

An Xiulan knew one thing her mother never shouted at anyone. No matter how tough the situation was, she had her way to handle it.

“No, you listen to me. She is not going anywhere.”

An Xiulan heard more loud voices.

“She is fine with waiting another year for college. Can you stop this? I can’t handle this?”

In the end, An Qinyan threw her phone on the bed after disconnecting the call. She looked and sounded very angry at this time.

“Yanyan, calm down, “Gu Yanxi softly said, rubbing her back.

An Qinyan looked at her husband and said, “Can you imagine that he is talking about sending Xiulan aboard in this condition? I agree that if she goes abroad for studies her academic year won’t be wasted. She scored good marks in high school exams to get admission to a foreign university but I can’t send her away when she is so fragile. She is mentally fragile. She needs her family at this time.”

Now An Xiulan understood why the two of them were fighting over the phone. Only An Qinyan’s children could be the reason behind her rage.

“Yanyan, think about other children, ” Gu Yanxi said in a low tone. “Lu Xuan is not going to Tsinghua or Peking because he wants to be near his sister. Gu Shangyan refuses to go aboard. Xueyun is choosing a home university. They all are thinking of Xiulan. I’m scared of this. Not just this, Zixin, that boy wants to repeat the year. He said he is not satisfied with the scores but we all know the truth. You have to talk to Xiulan and ask her to talk to her friends and brothers. This attitude can’t be accepted.”

“I don’t know what to do, ” An Qinyan sobbed as she hugged. “I’m scared. I’m so scared. If children really took this step, they will blame An Xiulan in the future for missed opportunities and if they don’t blame her, the silent resentment will one day turn into thorns that will tear apart their relationship.”

An Qinyan was not lying at this moment. She could see the future right before her eyes. If these children today took this step, they would always resent An Xiulan. If they didn’t resent her, An Xiulan would feel guilty about holding them back. In any case, she could see how messed up their relationship was going to be.

An Xiulan turned and went back to her room as she didn’t want to think about anything else. Her mind was occupied by the haunting pictures of what tomorrow may bring.

She lay on the bed and switched off the lights. She was scared of the lights now because facing herself in the mirror was getting difficult for her. She was ruining so many lives just being her.

She fell asleep at some moment. It was during the middle of the night when she felt her phone ringing. She rubbed her eyes and saw a foreign number shining on her screen.

“Hello?” She took the call.

“It’s me, ” A familiar feminine voice said. “Yoona.”

“Oh?”

“How are you?” Yoona inquired.

“I’m doing good, ” An Xiulan lied. Honestly, she didn’t know how she was doing.

“Can I talk to you?” Yoona asked in a soft voice.

“Why not, ” An Xiulan replied.

“I’m sorry, Xiulan, ” Yoona said in a cracking voice. “Please, stop Shangyan from committing the biggest mistake of his life. He is cancelling his admission to the university. Please.”

“Why are you telling me this?” An Xiulan asked. “He listens to you. If you tell him this, he will agree.”

An Xiulan didn’t feel right about interfering between the two of them. If she interfered today, Yoona or Gu Shangyan would ask her to do the same again and she didn’t want to be a middleman in their relationship.

“The day you got in an accident. He told me that he is not coming to London because you need him more, “Yoona said, hiding her resentment.

“I agree that you need him then, ” She added. “But it’s been around two months since then. He can’t keep doing this. “

“Yoona, I never asked anyone to be with me, ” An Xiulan said. “If he was with me at my difficult time, it means he knew that I would be with him during his difficult time too. I can’t push him away because if I was in his situation, I wouldn’t want to be pushed away either.”

“That’s not what I’m saying, ” Yoona sighed. “Xiulan, can you guarantee that a year from now Gu Shangyan won’t regret his decision? Do you want to be the reason why he failed to chase his dream? I heard that Xueyun is no longer going to Shanghai. Can your conscience agree with their decision? Can you see them sacrificing their life for you? An Xiulan, please. Think about what I said once. Only you can convince him now. Just for once, think for anyone other than you. Let’s not be selfish this time.”

An Xiulan clutched the phone tightly in her hold. “Yoona, thank you for calling. I will talk to Yan Ge but I will not force him to go abroad if he doesn’t want to.”

Yoona hung up the call when she said this.

______

A/N: I just want to assure you that they won’t end on a bitter note. It’s a wholesome book and you won’t have to cry buckets but I don’t know why I’m crying nonstop ending these last few chapters.

The volume will end in two chapters at most and I’m not ready. I want to bawl my eyes out.

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