"Did you really think that I wouldn't guess?" I asked as I continued to walk toward the red river, something inside of me needing to see it. "The hissing voice every time I got mad. The ice voice when I was overwhelmed and wanted to shut down. The gentle voice… well, I have no idea where that one came from."
"Because you want to be gentle and kind. You wanted to make the people stop hating you," said the gentle voice.
"That was then, this is now," I said as I finally reached the rocky banks of the river. I crouched down and stuck my hand in the water. A shadow darted away from my touch. I stared into the water, unable to look away as more and more shadows joined the first one and seemed to be swimming downstream.
"Beware when fighting monsters that you don't become a monster yourself, because when you stare long enough into the abyss, the abyss also stares into you," hissed the first voice.
"Friedrich Nietzsche," I replied as I continued to dip my hand into the water, startling the shadows. "But if we are going that route, here is another one for you, 'he who has a why to live for can bear almost any how'. Those men are my why and so I can bear any how."
"Even if it makes the world hate you?" asked the cold voice. I thought about it for a moment. I always wanted a man to love me enough to sacrifice the world in order to keep me safe. But now I realize that if I want that type of love, then I need to give that type of love.
"Bring it on," I said with a smile as the world turned white.
---
"She is coming too," I heard Liu Wei say as I opened my eyes. I was startled to see four faces staring down at me. "Hey guys," I said looking between them. "What's going on?"
The four of them chuckled and stepped away. That was when I realized that I was being carried in Liu Yu Zeng's arms. The men were walking towards the front gate, the rest of our men following behind us. "We had plans to hunt for supplies while you were out, but you woke up too soon," admitted Liu Wei as he adjusted the leather gloves on his hands. "However, that can change if you need it to."
"No," I said shaking my head. I could use a supply run.
"No one to kill?" asked Chen Zi Han as he looked down at me. I smiled back at him. "Oh, there are lots of people to kill, but I have all the time in the world," I answered as I wrapped my arms around Liu Yu Zeng's neck. "Might as well grab the supplies while we can. The cannon fodder will show up in time and can be killed off then."
I laughed as we passed through the gates and I took out all the vehicles that I had on hand. We piled in and set off.
---
"Now, are you going to tell us what is going on?" asked Wang Chao as the four men piled into my RV. I smirked at them. This was one of the first times that all four of them had ever been in here with me.
"Maybe?" I asked as I pulled out an ice cream cake. It was the best of all worlds. Ice cream and cake… rolled into one! Cutting myself a piece of it, I took out a fork and started to dig in.
"Princess…" said Chen Zi Han as he picked me up and sat me down on his lap. "Just tell us."
"Well, the voices in my head told me that you weren't mine and that each one of you had a destined woman," I started as I took a bite of the ice cream. "They suggested that I should let you guys go find them and when you did, you would save the world, rescue humanity from the brink of destruction, and probably issue in a new and prosperous era the likes of which has never been seen before. Oh, and live happily ever after."
"And if we didn't find them?" asked Wang Chao from where he was stilling on my couch, his legs crossed.
"Hell, fire, and the end of the world."
The four men looked at each other. "We'll take option B," said Liu Yu Zeng coming over and stealing a bite of my ice cream cake.
You know when you get the answer that you really wanted to hear so it takes a few seconds to process it? Yeah, that was the few seconds that that rat bastard managed to steal my ice cream cake! "I didn't know I was giving you guys an option," I said crankily as I took out another slice of the cake. I glared at all of them as I took a bit of cold, delicious vanilla and chocolate ice cream.
The four men chuckled and we all let the matter drop.
----
We made our first stop 20 minutes outside of the base. The men spread out in complete silence to gather the supplies that we needed while me and mine stood by my RV and waited for them to come back. This was what I should have had in my last life. Competent minions that could go out and do my bidding so I didn't have to work myself to the bone gathering enough supplies.
The men talked amongst themselves as I was staring off into space, debating whether we should save the people at City Y Sanctuary or let them fend for themselves. Honestly, I was more inclined to let them fend for themselves, Rule #1 and all, but I was hesitating solely based on the worry that there might be something useful for me in the future there.
As my mind went back and forth listing and discarding the pros and cons of both sides, I felt that intensive gaze from long ago. Straightening from where I was leaning against the RV, I searched the area around us, trying to figure out where the feeling of being watched was coming from.
It seemed to have the same intensity as when we were at the City J Naval Base, but I couldn't sense any hostility or rage.
"You know, I always wanted a stalker," I said out loud, still scanning the shadows. We were in a suburban neighborhood going house to house looking for supplies so there were no dark forests to hide in or tall buildings to shelter it.
At the sound of my voice, the guys stopped their conversation and turned to look at me.
"I mean, it is kind of… hot… to think that you occupy someone's mind so much that they became obsessed with you. That they refused to leave you alone for even a second." I could feel the stare becoming more intense, but I couldn't for the life of me, know where it was coming from.
"Yeah, I know, I probably have a lot of psychological issues, especially for admitting that, but hey, you try living three lifetimes and not end up with a few quirks." I looked around trying to see if I could find any animals, but there was none around. It wouldn't be out of place in a neighborhood like this to not have any animals, so I couldn't rule out it being natural and not the result of a zombie nearby.
"Is that what you are? A stalker? I mean, you would have to be if you followed us from the Navy Base to here. Maybe you were around my Elysian City too, I just never left the base to notice you." The boys walked over to me and formed a circle with me at its core. I could feel the tension leeching out of them as they took over scanning the area.
"See them? They will never let you get close enough to me to offer any harm. But you don't mean me any harm, do you? So what is it that you want?" I asked, knowing full well that it would be pointless to try and see around the guys.
"Am I your prey?" I continued to gloat the unknown being in the darkness. I could still feel its gaze. "Are you going to keep hunting me down over and over again? Until what? What is it that you want?" There was a slight breeze and then the feeling of being watched vanished into thin air.
"I don't know if that added another complication to my life or made it more interesting," I grumbled as the guys continued to search the area for a threat. "It's gone," I added as an afterthought. The guys turned around and studied me, trying to figure out what was going on in my head.
"Want to explain that, Sweetness?" asked Liu Yu Zeng as he came to stand in front of me.
"I'm training your replacement?" I replied with a smirk on my face.
Apparently, the guys didn't appreciate my sense of humor.
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