I limped back to camp. Jorra had wanted to quietly sneak back in with Bell, gather our things, and leave without me showing my face, but this felt important somehow. They needed to know that I was with them. That I was on their side. There was no doubt that some of them would come after me. Likely sooner than later. But running at the first sign of adversity was practically asking to be pursued.
Or at least, that had been the logic. With the number of eyes and undercurrent of hostility I was beginning to wonder how wise returning to the heart had actually been. Jorra rather loudly—struck up a conversation with Bell on how I had pursued the culprit, and had been the only one to act.
It was a bit too antagonistic, but I understood his need to fill the silence. Things were tense, and it wouldn’t take much to set off everything in a direction we could not come back from.
The conservator that had been standing guard earlier took me from Jorra and helped me into the medical tent. The older life magician who’d been absent earlier had returned, and began cataloguing my injuries. Despite being only a few years older than me, she had a motherly air, and to my relief, didn’t seem hostile in the slightest. She did grill me on details on the rogue arch-mage, and I was happy to give what details I could manage. She fixed the damage to my jaw and told me I was lucky I hadn’t lost any teeth, then presented me with a simple potion. I sniffed it experimentally and recognized the mix of herbs, a particularly potent anesthetic.
I took half, and felt my body relax. Within a few minutes I drifted into an almost meditative state. The things that Thoth had said, things that I had all but ignored, clawed at my mind, teasing possibilities I didn’t want to face.
I’d lived my first life as a fool. That was clear enough. I’d been completely apathetic of the plight of those below my station and selfish. It wasn’t beyond the pale to understand why someone might want to kill me in the process of overthrowing the kingdom. These things were not unheard of. A spoiled noble put to the sword as a symbol. You couldn’t just let the children go, as my father had so memorably stated.
But Thoth’s hatred for me went beyond that. Beyond all reasonable measure. Out of everything I’d done in my previous life, I couldn’t think of a single reason—and I’d spent months racking my mind—anyone would want to wound me personally.
So, Why?
A theory began to form, as difficult to grasp as it was horrible. Thoth remembered our previous life. I remembered our previous life. But who was to say it was the first time things had reset? The things she said implied the sort of experience that came over several lifetimes, not just one. And if that was true, if she retained all her memories, what the hells had I done to make her hate me so much?
And perhaps more importantly, if she died, did things roll back for her as well? If that was true, it wouldn’t be a question of getting lucky and out maneuvering her once. How could I possibly hope to defeat her? That was too overwhelming to even think about. I mentally added the note to my ever-growing list to look more deeply into the subject of time magic. It hadn’t occurred to me since the Everwood, really.A hand touched my leg. I started. Maya’s face dipped into my vision, mouth set and grim. “I take my eye off you for one moment, and you are already injured.”
Maybe it was the drugs talking, but I couldn’t distance myself the way I had in Ralakos’s estate. The words just tumbled out. “I missed you, Maya.”
Maya blinked, looked away. “And here I thought you had outgrown me. What, with your councilor friends with their fancy houses and your adorable void magicians.”
Experience told me there was some subtext there, but I was too medicated to pick up on subtle social complexities. I laughed a bit too loud. “No. You were my first friend. It’s impossible to be demoted from that position.”
Maya hesitated. “You never told me that.”
I hadn’t?
“That’s… embarrassing.” I felt myself turning red. It was made more awkward by the fact that it was true. Across both lives. I’d had other ‘friends,’ but the delineation between Maya and them was important. Some had left me at the first sign of adversity. Most had left for what felt like no reason at all. Despite what felt like a never-ending trail of obstacles, Maya was still here. That felt important, somehow.
“While you were gone. Even when things were darkest. And gods did things get... dark.” I squeezed my eyes shut, banishing the images that bubbled up. A hand clasped mine, banishing them away. Somehow, I managed to finish. “Even mired in all that, the thought of seeing you again, it stayed with me. Kept me going.” A moment of clarity bubbled up and my mind cleared temporarily from the anesthetized state. “Elphion. Sorry, I’m saying too much-“
Maya placed her forehead against mine, silencing me. “It was the same for me, Ni’lend.” She looked as if she might say something more.
Vogrin cleared his throat. Maya jerked away from me, as if burned, her cheeks coloring.
“Sorry to spoil the moment, but I assume you’ll want to hear this.” Vogrin didn’t sound the least bit apologetic. He floated over to my bedside in my demonic form, and looked between the two of us curiously.
“Go ahead.” I told him, willing him to get on with it.
“Thoth is on the move, making excellent time. She seems to be teleporting. Not unexpected, for a magician of her caliber—though the sheer distance she is covering would give anyone pause. But more interesting is where she’s ended up.” He paused as if for dramatic effect, waiting for either of us to ask. When we didn’t, he continued on with a scowl. “Fine. She’s come to a rest in the Oracle’s Cradle.”
I didn’t recognize the name, but Maya breathed a sharp intake of breath. I looked to her for clarification. “The oracles cradle is believed to be the birthplace of the first of my kind. Infaris.” That, I recognized. The infernals referred to her on the same level one might refer to a deity, or at the very least, a saint.
“It’s a hallowed place. Of spiritual significance. Nothing practical. It’s something of a boon if we’re able to make our way there before the end of our term in the sanctum. On its own, it’s perfectly benign, but it’s positioned on the outer edges, and the way there is incredibly dangerous. Only the best of us make it. Most turn back before the halfway point.” Maya turned back to me. “I cannot imagine what someone like her would want with the gods.”
“It’s safe to say she’s not looking to repent.” I muttered. But the words stirred at my memory. What had she said to me, all that time ago?
The gods are dead.
That had to be significant. I’d never put much stock in the human gods, other than a yearly sacrifice and quarterly rounds to their temples, as was considered proper. In all likelihood, Thoth would be gone by the time we arrived. But I’d be a fool to ignore a clue as blatant as this, even if it did feel like reaching.
“I think we should modify our route.” I said. “How will you go about contacting Ozra?” It occurred to me that I’d slipped, mentioning the name in front of Maya. Damn anesthetic.
“Ozra?” Maya asked.
“Asmodial arch-fiend. Has a… shared interest in Thoth.” I answered, keeping it vague. Maya shivered.
“That was next on the docket,” Vogrin replied. “I’ll need some mana from you. Have you recovered from your earlier incident?”
I focused inwards, and discovered I had. The ambient mana in the sanctum was no joke. It would have taken me a significant amount of time, before. Perhaps as much as half a day. But, in as little as three it was as if nothing had happened, injuries notwithstanding. “Do it,” I said.
The resulting sensation was not unlike bleeding out. It pulled from me, leaving me feeling tired, exhausted, and empty.
A half dozen ugly, gremlin like creatures constructed out of rune covered red stone and glowing blue connections that bound the stone together.
“I present to you, your children,” Vogrin said.
“… Excuse me?”
“That was a joke.”
I saw Maya breathe a sigh of relief out of the corner of my eye.
Vogrin continued. “Think of these constructs as messenger birds. Only without the need to drink, or eat, or rest. They’re surprisingly hardy for their size, but most will be struck down. So, we’ll do this from time to time. Statistically, it’s inevitable that a few of them will eventually get through.”
I poked at one, and it chittered away, bumping into its fellows, making angry squeaking noises.
“Their intelligence is limited.” Vogrin commented.
“I can see that.”
“But they are quick.” Vogrin raised an arm and snapped his fingers. The creatures took off at a speed maybe two, three times faster than I’d been running pushing my inscriptions to their limits. One tore through the canvas of the tent itself, nearly ripping through it before righting itself and heading through the exit. Within seconds, they were gone.
“They’re better when I have more mana to work with,” Vogrin groused.
I ignored him, turning my focus back to Maya. “Heading back to your team now?”
Maya shook her head. “I think it is clear enough that things have changed. And if there is one constant in the world, you will be getting hurt again.”
That was true enough. But still, Thoth’s words had crept their way into my head. That I would warp everything that I touched. Perhaps it was nothing more than psychological warfare, designed to make me question myself, my use of my allies. That didn’t change the fact that it was effective.
“You don’t have to,” I said. “You don’t owe me.”
There was a flash of disappointment in her expression, quickly buried under something approaching righteous indignation. “What did we talk about? This is not obligation. It’s a question of right and wrong.”
I leaned back. “But-”
“And what of my brother? You expect me to just let you drag him to the outer-reach, well beyond any medical outposts in case things go wrong?” I could see her building herself up.
“Okay, okay.” I held my hands out flat in surrender. “We’d be happy to have you.”
----
The next day was spent in preparation. It was important that it didn’t look like we were running away from the heart, rather, simply setting off on an expedition to look for the arch-magician that was the source of the problem. The conservators had done their best to restore order, but they could do nothing for the dubious looks, the weight of doubt and fear that hung heavy over the camp.
But as I had already learned, the infernals were civilized folk. Just because a disembodied voice told them to come after me, to take my head, didn’t mean they were going to do it. At least, not immediately. The desperation would come after. In the event the barrier remained after the two-week cutoff. That was when things would get ugly, desperate. There needed to be a solution by then.
I was, in part, tempted to trigger a reset. But I remembered all too well the way the darkness had pulled at me. Almost swallowing me. It was possible that if I killed myself, I would find myself barred, forever lost in that black ether. Or worse, dragged to hades, arriving at my final resting place. I shuddered. Without knowing how long it took my ability to recover, it simply wasn’t an option I could risk.
And just because we were trying to send a particular image didn’t make us fools. Jorra went out and socialized amongst the camp, speaking loudly to vendors about the supplies needed for a supposed route following the coastal hubs and out towards the ruby plains. It was a slight change, but close enough to the route recommended for new entrants in the sanctum.
This was, of course, disinformation. Our actual path would be completely different.
Once my mana had recovered, I sent Vogrin out to listen, especially amongst the older infernals. In part, I wanted to know how much time we had. There were a few that were within the month. Most had three to four. I took some solace in that. I had done more with less to work with, up against enemies almost as powerful.
More importantly, we snagged a lead. I discovered that we weren’t the only ones looking for Morthus. The conservators were planning to send a group out to search for him in the miasmal pits. It wouldn’t be a direct line to the cradle, but it wasn’t in the opposite direction either.
“Ready to go?” Maya sidled up beside me, checking me with her hip. The staff I’d given her was strapped to her back.
The introspective funk I’d fallen into all but subsided.
I smiled. “I think it’s about that time.”
“Did your bag get even heavier?” Bellarex called out to Jorra. His bag was open now, combined with another saddlebag that was tied across the top.
“Merchants,” Jorra huffed. “They drove a hard bargain.”
“Packrat.” Maya rolled her eyes.
Jorra looked to me for help. “Come on, you’re gonna let them gang up on me like this?”
With some effort, I quashed the doubt, the fear. We had trained for this, prepared for it. Thoth being in the mix changed little. It just expedited a confrontation that I’d thought would come much further down the line.
The plan remained mostly unchanged. I still needed to locate Morthus and find someone to teach me the flame. But the immediate priorities had shifted to finding an elder capable of dismantling the barrier, and learning why Thoth had chosen the destination she had. I looked at my companions, and found that I trusted them, no matter the trials ahead.
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