70 Landon and Lucien

Landon...

Landon was crying.

‘Landon... You are back...’

He kept crying as he ran and ran into the night.

‘Please don’t cry, Landon... Why are you crying?’

The wolf sniffled for a while before he finally spoke up.

‘Why, Lucien?’ he asked, his tone full of recrimination. ‘You love Ronan. I know you do. So why? Why did you do everything to sabotage your happiness?’

Lucien sighed.

‘Landon, you know why.’

.....

‘Don’t give me that bullshit excuse with your father because I am not taking it,’ the wolf snapped. ‘What is the real reason, Lucien?’

‘There is no other reason,’ Lucien answered meekly. ‘I had to do things in the best interest of my family.’

The cold wind whipped against the wolf’s face.

‘It is always like this,’ he spoke bitterly. ‘Always. Always making the decision that is good for everyone but yourself! You are even willing to sell yourself to the enemy!’ Landon spat at Lucien.

Lucien could only close his eyes and sigh.

‘Then what about me, Lucien? What about me?!’

‘...’

‘Do I mean nothing to you?!’

‘... You know that is not true.’

‘Then why do you choose to hurt me?! Day and night, the pain... The pain... I can’t take it...’

‘I never blamed you for leaving.’

‘Of course. You had no right for blaming me!’

‘...’

Landon wailed. His sobs grew increasingly louder.

‘Landon, don’t cry. What is it this time?’

Landon already left once. And then he came back again. For what?

Lucien sighed in his heart.

He did not want Landon to suffer.

If Landon was happier when he was away from Lucien, then maybe it was for the best.

Lucien was trapped between the walls. Pick the pack or pick his wolf? Pick his family or pick his fated mate?

Whatever he picked, it would always be wrong.

He just never thought that he would end up hurting himself and Landon so badly.

‘Landon, please don’t cry,’ Lucien begged again. ‘I will listen to you this time. You can do whatever you want with me. Just stop crying.’

I can’t take it.

I owe Landon too much.

That was Lucien’s last thought when fatigue and malnourishment took their toll on his body and sent his consciousness into a deep slumber.

When Lucien opened his eyes again, it had been a week since Ronan brought him to the hospital. He was lying on a bed in the middle of the night. The room was dimly lit by a lamp with a flower-shaped shade at the nightstand.

Lucien turned his head weakly on the pillow and saw that an IV drip hung from a stand and connected to his hand.

His whole body hurt.

And he was so thirsty.

Lucien opened his mouth but nothing came out.

He was also unable to move even a single finger.

How was he supposed to call for help?

The door opened with a clacking sound and in entered a man.

“Lulu...?”

Lucien furrowed his brows. The man’s face was obscured by the darkness, but his voice was familiar.

Ronan.

“Hey...”

Ronan approached Lucien’s bed and caressed his cheeks lovingly. “Hey, how are you feeling?”

Lucien swallowed hard. He opened his mouth again, and again he was unable to say anything.

“Water? You must be thirsty,” Ronan quickly said.

The Alpha went to pour Lucien some water from a container that stood on a table some distance away. He put the glass of water on the nightstand, helped Lucien to sit, and then held the glass against his lips to help him drink.

The glass of water was like rain on the desert. Lucien’s throat finally did not feel dry anymore. Ronan pressed his forehead against Lucien’s. Lucien’s forehead felt warm against his.

“You still have some fever. Why don’t you sleep a bit more?” He suggested.

Lucien shook his head.

“I slept enough. What happened to me?”

Ronan lowered his gaze and took Lucien’s hand in his.

“What do you remember last?”

Lucien’s eyes wandered away from Ronan’s face.

“I remember attacking Kinnon.”

He clenched at Ronan’s hand. “Is he... alive?”

Jealousy climbed up Ronan’s throat. Displeasure was written all over his face.

Must they talk about Kinnon right after Lucien woke up?

Ronan took a deep breath and cleared his throat.

“Yes. He is recuperating.”

“Was it serious? His wound, I mean.”

Landon almost ripped the poor man into two, but of course Ronan would not tell Lucien that.

“It was not that bad. He is fine. Let’s not talk about him.”

But then what should they talk about? About Lucien and Ronan?

Both of them fell into awkward silence.

“Do you uh... Do you want to eat something?” Ronan asked awkwardly.

Lucien shook his head. “I am not hungry.”

“You have to eat something,” Ronan insisted. “The doctor said that it’s best to start with something light. I will order you some porridge. Do you want fish? Shrimp? Chicken? Beef?”

Lucien did not answer. He merely gave Ronan a strange look.

“Ronan.”

“... What?”

Ronan gulped. Was Lucien going to kick him out? Because there was supposedly nothing between them anymore?

“Are you tired?” Ronan asked, retracting his hand from Lucien’s grip.

“Ronan...”

“You should sleep a bit more. I will order the porridge and then I will call the nurse to help you eat...”

Lucien grabbed Ronan’s hand.

“Ronan, thank you. For saving me.”

.....

Oh.

Ronan held his breath while staring at Lucien. That was it?

After Lucien did not say anything else to kick Ronan out, the man finally felt safe enough to relax. He pressed a chaste kiss on Lucien’s forehead.

“No need to thank me.”

Ronan raised a hand to caress Lucien’s cheek. His thumb slowly moved to touch Lucien’s tender lips. It pressed against Lucien’s lower lip, the topmost part gently lodged between Lucien’s lips.

The two men were so busy with each other that they did not hear the sound of a third person coming.

“Indeed, there is no need for him to thank you. I should be the one to thank Alpha Ronan instead.”

The door opened and Kinnon Youngshaper walked in.

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