Chapter 59: Resolution
“I’ve seen a lot of students dating. But you two seem exceptionally sweet together, don’t you think?”
“Ah, that’s embarrassing. Anyway, thank you for the counseling. Can I leave now?”
“Sure, go meet your girlfriend. Oh, right. Han-gyeol, do you also want to go to the same university as Eun-ha?”
“Yes, I’d like to go to the same university.”
“But you do know, if you set your sights on Eun-ha’s university, it might be a bit of a step down for you?”
“Really? I hadn’t thought there was much of a difference.”
Hearing my question, the teacher offered sincere advice.
“It’s great to want to attend the same university, but not at the expense of not going to one that matches your capabilities.”
“I understand. But did Eun-ha say during her counseling session that she wants to go to the same university as me?”
“Yes. She seemed a bit worried. Maybe because your grades are so high? She seemed a bit intimidated. Make sure to comfort her.”
“I will, thank you.”
After finishing the counseling session, I left the teacher’s office.
I hadn’t realized Eun-ha felt that way.
Was her slightly low mood today because of that?
Returning to the classroom with these thoughts, I saw Eun-ha studying at her desk. Yet, she seemed to be frowning slightly as she worked on a problem.
I thought about going over and talking directly, but decided against it.
If this makes Eun-ha study harder, then that was not necessarily a bad thing.
Ah, but was that too calculative of me?
From a results-oriented view, maybe, but I did want to cheer Eun-ha up.
However, I didn’t want to nag someone who was already working hard to do more, nor did it feel right to irresponsibly tell her to just keep doing as she was.
Being a student preparing for university entrance exams, things seemed more complicated than I expected.
Even while dating, thoughts of the exams lingered in my mind.
I was sure wanting to date more and have fun wasn’t something only I felt.
But how could I cheer Eun-ha up?
I couldn’t just go and kiss her...
No matter how much I think about it, I couldn’t come up with a good idea.
Even after the afternoon classes were over, Eun-ha was unusually quiet on the way home.
Should I try a witty joke, or suggest going somewhere fun to change her mood?
While pondering ways to make Eun-ha smile, a flower shop caught my eye. It seemed like the most sensible option for the situation, so I told Eun-ha I’d go home to study today. Seeing her slightly gloomy face hurt, but I planned to quickly buy flowers and head straight to her house.
“Take care on your way home.”
“Yeah, I will. I’ll text you once I’m home~”
After waving goodbye to Eun-ha, I hurried to the flower shop. Entering the fragrant store, I was greeted by an unexpected sight.
“What can I help you with?”
The man who approached me had a deep, robust voice, his bulging biceps showcasing his masculinity.
“Uh... I came to buy some flowers.”
“My dear! People come to a flower shop to buy flowers, of course.”
His question was answered by a woman who rushed over with a kind smile.
“Sorry about that. My husband’s not great with words. What kind of flowers are you looking for?”
“Uh, I don’t really know much about flowers. I want to get something for my girlfriend. What do you recommend?”
“Ah, I see. How about some baby’s breath for a safe choice?”
Maybe I should ask about the meaning of the flowers.
But that felt embarrassingly cliché.
Still, I didn’t want to buy just anything. After browsing a bit, I pointed to some blue roses.
“Would these blue roses be a good gift?”
“Ah, they might be okay, but their meaning might not suit the occasion.”
“What’s their meaning?”
I was glad the conversation had turned to the meanings of flowers.
“Originally, blue roses didn’t exist in nature, so they meant ‘impossibility’. But after they were developed, they came to symbolize ‘unyielding love’. Oh, and they also mean ‘miracle’. Does that fit your situation?”
“No, I think I’ll choose something else. Sorry.”
“No problem at all. Would you like me to introduce you to some other flowers with different meanings?”
“Really? I’d appreciate that, though it’s a bit embarrassing.”
“Alright, let’s start from here, and I’ll explain them one by one.”
After listening to all the florist’s suggestions, I chose what seemed best.
With a small bouquet in hand, I hurried to Eun-ha’s house. Was it my imagination, or were people glancing at me a bit?
Breathless from the run, I soon reached Eun-ha’s place.
“Haa...”
I took a deep breath in front of her house and pressed the doorbell, hiding the bouquet behind my back as I waited in silence. Soon, the door opened, and there was Eun-ha, still in her school uniform.
“Han-gyeol?”
“Ah, hi.”
“Why are you here and not at home?”
Why did gifting flowers feel so embarrassingly significant?
“No, it’s just... You seemed a bit down.”
“Yeah, a bit down?”
“I brought this for you.”
Cautiously, I presented the bouquet from behind my back. Eun-ha took the flowers and looked straight at me.
“Please, don’t stare too much; it’s embarrassing.”
I averted my gaze slightly as I spoke.
“Ah... Han-gyeol...!”
But then, Eun-ha’s voice trembled, startling me.
“Huh?! What? Eun-ha?!”
Eun-ha, holding my bouquet, was in tears. They say girls always love receiving flowers, but Eun-ha seemed to be the exception. Could it be a pollen allergy? While I was fretting, Eun-ha spoke.
“I’m sorry... so sorry, Han-gyeol.”
Suddenly, she hugged me tightly and began to cry. The situation was baffling, but I focused on calming Eun-ha down. Gently, I stroked her hair and comforted her.
“It’s okay.”
Eun-ha cried in my arms for quite some time. After about three minutes, she gently pulled away and looked intently into my face.
Though I wished she would say something, Eun-ha just continued to hold back tears. Then, a sudden thought crossed my mind.
“Eun-ha, don’t tell me...”
It couldn’t be.
Could it really be that?
I was afraid to ask, but I had to voice my heavy thoughts.
“Eun-ha, are you really going abroad? When is it? Did you say a year? Since when?”
I asked, gripping her shoulders.
“No, it’s not that! I’m not going abroad...”
“Then why are you crying? What’s wrong? Are you hurt?”
“No, not hurt... Should we go out and talk?”
“That sounds like something you’d say before going abroad. Are you sure you’re not going?”
“Yes...! I’m really not. It’s not that, let’s just go out...”
“Okay, then...”
We took the elevator down and sat on a bench in the nearby park. Eun-ha, sticking close to me, spoke with her head bowed.
“I have a confession to make...”
“What kind of confession? It’s not about you going abroad, is it?”
“NO, it’s not about going abroad.”
“Then what is it?”
I was relieved, at least for the moment. I had thought Eun-ha was suddenly going to be far away.
“It’s just that...”
“Take your time and tell me.”
This seemed serious enough for a heart-to-heart. Eun-ha continued, her head still bowed as if she were a guilty sinner.
“I’ve been feeling a bit anxious because you’re good at studying...”
“Huh?”
“I always believed we would go to the same university, but... it’s not like that. You can’t choose a lower-ranking university because of me... The thought that we couldn’t always be together made me anxious.”
Eun-ha began to calmly explain her feelings.
“I could understand that much. But then, I felt a little relieved that you’re not good at Korean. I think I was even happy about it. Instead of being proud and happy about my boyfriend being good at his studies, I felt annoyed and hated myself for feeling relieved in such a selfish way...”
Her guilt was deep, and tears started to flow again. They fell to the ground with a soft ‘thud’.
“Is that what it was all about?”
Gently, I turned her head towards me and wiped her tears, reassuring her.
“It’s okay, Eun-ha. That’s a completely natural feeling.”
“How can it be natural? Who would feel relieved to see their loved one fail at something?”
“No, it’s true. Everyone feels that way when they’re in love. I would’ve been anxious if you were too perfect. I’m just an ordinary guy, and Eun-ha, you’re like a shining star. I always worry, what if you hate me? What if you fly away somewhere - ”
“No... Han-gyeol, you are the shining one to me. I could never hate you.”
“But it’s a ‘what if.’”
“Even as a ‘what if,’ that could never happen. Han-gyeol, you always shine in my eyes. You’re the one I always want to be close to. So there’s no way I would fly away and leave you.”
Even as tears streamed down her face, Eun-ha spoke with unwavering certainty.
“Even if it’s just a ‘what if,’ such a thing will never happen.”
I was left speechless by Eun-ha’s emphatic words.
What could I say to Eun-ha, who was determined to affirm everything about me?
Her resolute attitude warmed a corner of my heart. More than anything, I was touched that Eun-ha, always so altruistic, showed a hint of selfishness for my sake.
“I feel the same. To me, Eun-ha always shines. You’re the one I want by my side every day. So, don’t worry. And don’t feel guilty about those feelings. I’m actually happy knowing you like me that much.”
After all, the emotion of love is often mixed with selfish desires.
I wished she would love only me.
I hoped she looked only at me.
I wanted her to care for me alone.
These feelings, which could be seen as possessiveness, might very well be at the heart of love.
“So let’s not worry too much about things that haven’t happened yet, okay? Don’t worry. In my eyes, Eun-ha is the most beautiful and adorable in the world. Even when you cry, it’s beautiful.”
“That’s not true... It’s not beautiful at all.”
Eun-ha’s mood seemed to lighten slightly, the corners of her mouth turning up.
“You are beautiful. Now, let’s stop crying and go eat something tasty. How about we go for some spicy tteokbokki that you like?”
My playful suggestion had Eun-ha staring intently at my face before she grabbed my head.
“Huh? Eun-ha?”
“I love you... really... more than anyone in the world.”
“Ah, you’re making me blush. I also love Eun-ha the most in the world—”
Before I could finish, Eun-ha’s lips pressed against mine. I hadn’t expected her to initiate the kiss... But feeling elated, I wrapped my arms around her waist in response.
--- The End OF The Chapter ---
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