The first thing Lucy did when she woke up the next morning was reach out for Tom, but when her hands made contact with the empty space beside her, she frowned as she sat up and turned on the bedside lamp.
Where was Tom? She mused as she glanced at the clock beside her. It was just past four in the morning.
They had gotten home sometime past eleven the previous night, and had shared the bath together, relaxing, talking about all that had happened at the engagement party and making love before finally going to sleep.
She got out of bed and looked around to find her oversized T-shirt which she threw over her head before going out in search of Tom.
She found him in the living room, dressed in just his boxers and sipping from a mug of coffee with his back to her.
Judging by his posture, Lucy guessed he was lost in his thoughts so she decided to sneak up on him on tiptoes, but before she got to where he was, he sensed her presence and turned to her.
He smiled at the sight of her touseled hair and sleepy face which was now set in a pout at being caught.
"How did you know I was here?" She asked, and Tom chuckled as he pointed to her shoulder.
"Good morning. Missed me?" he asked as he set down the coffee mug, and she bobbed her head as she climbed onto his lap straddling him.
"Yeah. Why are you up already? Did you even get any sleep?" she asked as she watched his face since she knew she had slept first.
"I couldn't fall asleep," he said with a shrug.
"Why?" she asked with concern.
Tom smiled, "You were snoring so badly..."
"Liar! I don't snore!" Lucy hissed and he chuckled as he rubbed his eyes which were beginning to feel really heavy.
Despite the fact the he was exhausted and wanted to sleep, his mind wasn't. He was too worried to go to bed.
"Is something bothering you?" Lucy asked as she rubbed his shoulders gently.
Tom hesitated a moment before shaking his head, "I don't know. I guess I'm feeling really anxious. In a couple of hours the result will be out. I'm just worried," Tom confessed.
"Aww!" Lucy cooed as she embraced him.
Tom buried his face in the crook of her neck and tried to relax as she patted his back like a mother comforting a troubled child.
"I didn't expect you to lose sleep over it," Lucy said softly.
"How could I not? If the result comes back positive it means my whole life is going to change, Lucy..."
"For the better hopefully," she said in a soothing voice as she pulled away to look into his face.
"What if it isn't for the better? What if I'm not prepared for it? I mean, I don't even know what I'm expected to do. How am I supposed to build a relationship with the child if she is mine?" Tom said and Lucy giggled.
"What's funny?" he asked with a frown, and she grinned.
"I never thought the day would come when I would see the almighty Thomas Hank doubting himself," she said with a teasing smile, and Tom sighed.
"I'm being serious."
"And I am being serious too. How can you even doubt yourself?" Lucy asked incredulously.
"What if I'm not ready to be a father yet?" he asked with a frown.
"How could you not be ready? You've always wanted to have a child and now you just might have one. I expect you to be excited not second-guessing yourself," Lucy said, and Tom shook his head.
"This is different, Lu. Wanting it is different from being all round prepared to take on the responsibility. Take Bryan for instance. Sonia is pregnant and he has the whole of nine months to prepare his mind towards fatherhood. But you see this? It's like it is being thrust upon me. There is no enough time for me to prepare. It's all so sudden," he said and she sighed.
This must have been one of the things Harry had meant when he said Tom must have a lot on his mind. It had not exactly occurred to her that apart from being worried about her reaction to the news he would be so worried about not being ready to be a father.
pandasnovel.com "If you ask me, I think you're more than ready and would do an excellent job. Let's assume you were adopting. It would be the same as this. Adopting a grown up child…"
"No, it wouldn't," Tom cut in.
"It's not just about her age or the fact that I missed out on her birth and all. It's about being ready for it psychologically. If I were going for an adoption I would be adopting with an already prepared mind. I would even be the one to see the child, bond with the child and choose to adopt them myself. This is different. If the DNA result comes back positive I have no choice in the matter. I have to meet this cute little stranger and try everything I can to form a bond with her. How and where would I start from? What if she ends up not liking me as she gets to know me?" Tom asked, and even though Lucy was tempted to laugh again, she shook her head.
"Who wouldn't love you? Besides, didn't you say she was happy to see you when they came up to the hotel to see you?" Lucy reminded him.
"I don't know, Lucy," Tom said as he rested his head on her bosom and she patted it gently.
"I thought I was the overthinker in this relationship. Are you trying to take my position from me?" She asked, and Tom smiled.
"I think it's a good thing we are well balanced. You can be reasonable while I am overthinking and vice versa," Tom said and Lucy kissed the tip of his nose.
"Don't you think you are forgetting something?" she asked, and he looked up at her.
"What?"
"The fact that you won't exactly be doing it alone. I will be right beside you cheering and supporting you in every way that I can," Lucy said, and Tom smiled as his hands moved over her back.
"As much as I would love to have you do this with me, I couldn't possibly ask you to do something I know you don't want to. Last time we had conversation about kids you made it clear you didn't want to be involved with one whether birthing them or adopting them," Tom reminded her.
"Yeah. And that was before we realized I might not have much of a choice in the matter since the man I am crazily in love with probably has one already. What kind of a lover would I be if I left you to take care of this all by yourself?" Lucy asked reasonably.
Before Tom could respond she kissed the side of his lips, "It's a good thing I'm not the only one with drama and baggage in the relationship. Not that I'm calling the kid a baggage," Lucy rushed to add so he wouldn't misunderstand.
"I'm just trying to say, you don't have to ask me to do any of this with you. I will love to be here for you for change," she said as she held Tom's gaze with a firm one of her own.
"Thanks," Tom said, and she shrugged.
"If we are done with that, can we return to the bedroom now? You need to get some sleep, love. Why don't you come in and rest your eyes for the next couple of hours? I'm sure no one would mind terribly if you show up at the office an hour late," Lucy suggested.
"I doubt I'd be able to get any sleep. Not after consuming two mugs of coffee," Tom said and she raised a brow.
"So, why did you take coffee then?"
"Because I wanted to drink something other than water, and there was no alcohol," Tom said, and she nodded.
"I see. Perhaps we can wear the coffee out of your system, what do you think?" She asked with a suggestive wink and Tom chuckled.
"I think you might end up wearing yourself out in the process," he said, and she grinned.
"I guess that's a little price to pay in order to put you to sleep. I will have to pilfer a couple of bottles when next I sleep over at your place," Lucy said and Tom raised a brow.
"Why pilfer when you can just buy it?"
"You don't possibly expect me to buy the sort of wine you prefer with my money, do you? Do you think I haven't checked the prices of the wines at your bar? I've been thinking about it, you know? I think that's the downside of having a wealthy boyfriend. You have such an expensive taste and I think I might have to break my account to get you anything of your taste," she said and he chuckled as he rose, still carrying her, and headed for the bedroom.
"Then you should allow me place you on a monthly girlfriend allowance. That way you can afford to buy me stuff of my taste," Tom said and she rolled her eyes.
"Buy you stuff with your own money? How romantic. I'd rather break my account. What's the point in working so hard and saving so much if I can't afford to splurge on the love of my life?" she asked, and Tom chuckled as he dropped her on the bed and she wrapped her legs around him so that he would remain on top of her.
"I think you're awesome, Tom. And would make an excellent father. Any child would be proud and lucky to have you as their dad," she said with a serious expression.
"If you think so why don't we make at least one proud and lucky child together some time in the future?" Tom asked, half expecting her to pull away or dismiss it, but to his surprise she giggled.
"I guess I will have to think about it," she said, surprising him further.
He wasn't sure whether to ask if she meant it or if she was pulling his legs, but he decided not to push it. Maybe he could playfully bring it up again next time so he could know what was going on in her head.
He didn't know if she realized it yet, but so much about her was changing. And he loved it both for her and for himself.
A couple of hours later, seated behind the desk in his office, Tom received the eCopy of the DNA paternity result that had been bothering him all through the weekend and without opening or downloading it he dialed Lucy's line.
He knew he could have called Harry to do this with him, but the person he wanted to be with him right now was Lucy. He wanted her to be here with him when he opened it so they could see the result together.
"Tom?" Lucy asked the moment she received the call, wondering if everything was alright.
"They've sent the result," Tom said, and Lucy's heart skipped a beat at that.
"And?" She asked, holding her breath as she waited for him to tell her the result of the test.
"I haven't checked it yet. Can you come over to my office so we open it together?" He asked, and without thinking twice Lucy shut down her laptop and rose.
"I'm coming over right now," she said as she hung up the call.
She quickly picked her blazers from where she hung it and put it on as she strode out of her office, walking briskly.
Tom might not know it, but the DNA paternity test result was just as important to her as it was to him. The presence of this kid wouldn't only be changing his life but hers as well.
Seeing how it seemed like she was begining to rethink her decision on marriage and having kids, there was every possibility that this one child might end up being her first child as well even if she was going to be her stepdaughter.
If the kid happened to be his, then this might just be the child that would determine whether or not she was interested in having kids of her own.
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