Chapter 360 Bucket List
Miley sat on the couch which Lucas had slept the previous night, with both legs folded under her as she watched a television show while she waited for Lucas, who was cleaning up, to finish and join her.She had to admit that Lucas was a welcome distraction. She had been distraught since the moment she heard about her condition, but focusing on Lucas and his own problems seemed to take her mind off hers.
She had gone to get drunk as usual, wanting to go home with a random stranger for another night of wild pleasure, when she saw him. That had been her lifestyle since she found out she was dying. Excessive drinking and sex. There was no reason not to indulge herself and get as much pleasure as she could before dying.
That was one reason she had been keeping the news of her cancer away from her family. But now that Amy had found out about it, she was going to have to tell them herself before Amy did.
She didn't know what she was going to do. How was she ever going to bring herself to inform her parents that she, their only kid, was going to die in six months or less?
Although the doctors had suggested that she stay in the hospital and receive treatment as that might increase her chances of survival up to a year, but what was the point? What was the point of living for a year if she was going to spend the entire time on a sick bed? She mused with a scoff.
The doctors had also said she would be in a lot of pain if she didn't receive treatment. But that was merely the physical pain. The pain, anger, and resentment she harbored in her heart at the unfairness of life beat whatever pain in her head.
She wanted to delay the announcement to her family for as long as possible since she knew very well that her parents would bundle her to the hospital if they had to and get her admitted if that would mean a better prognosis.
She wasn't interested in any of that since she knew they would be doing that for themselves. They would be doing that because they wanted to spend some more time with their dying daughter, not caring if that was what she wanted.
She wanted to be selfish and do something for herself just because she wanted to. Not that her parents were bad or anything, no. On the contrary, they were excellent and supportive parents, and indeed they deserved to spend more time with her. But she also deserved to live longer than this, but she wasn't, was she? People rarely got what they deserved.
She winced when her eyes twitched with another bout of intense headache. She was at least glad that her doctor had given her such a potent pain relief medication to improve the quality of her life, if not the quantity.
She stood up to take the medicine and saw Lucas, who had been standing by the doorway watching her as different emotions flickered across her elegant face. From the look in his eyes, she could tell he was feeling very sorry for her, and she didn't exactly like it.
People often looked at her with respect, admiration, envy, lust, longing, adoration, and even fear sometimes, but never pity. The last time she saw that look was in high school when Rachel picked on her. She absolutely hated that look.
Her face was carefully blank as her gaze swept over him, taking in the new outfit he was wearing. She tossed back her hair with lazy feminity, "You look much better. How long have you been standing there?" She asked as she casually walked past him and went to the dining to take her pain relief medication.
"Long enough to know you must have a lot on your mind," Lucas said as he sat down on a couch adjacent to the one she had been sitting on.
"We all have thoughts. That is why we are living beings," she said dismissively as she poured herself a glass of water, and Lucas watched as she swallowed the medicine.
He could tell that she was masking her emotions once again. He had seen the flicker of dislike on her face before her face went blank. She hated that he had seen her in a vulnerable state.
"Your head is aching?" Lucas asked when she remained there with her eyes closed after taking the medication.
She opened her eyes and looked at him with mild amusement, "My head is almost always aching. I thought I told you that already?" She asked.
"When are you going to start receiving your treatments?" He asked and she shook her head.
"I don't have any plans of doing that."
"Why? That would at least give you some more time," Lucas suggested.
"Some more time to do what exactly? Lie on the hospital bed looking sickly? And lose my precious hair during chemotherapy? Spend what little time I have left in hospital gowns when I have designer brands hanging in my wardrobe that I'm yet to wear? I'm too vain to live out the rest of my life that way," she said with a wry smile as she returned to her seat.
"Chemotherapy isn't the only option. You could have a craniotomy. Or a radio..."
"Do you think I haven't considered all my options? I have. The risk involved is too much because of how far gone it is, and I don't want to take any risks. I'd rather spend the remaining time having fun and ticking every item on my bucket list," she said with a bright smile.
Lucas remained silent for some time, "Losing your hair is nothing compared to losing your life," he reminded her.
"Even if I go through with it, I'm still going to lose my life eventually, am I not? I'd rather die with my precious hair than lose a strand of it getting a treatment that would only extend my life a little," she said dismissively, and Lucas sighed.
"What about you?" She asked, and Lucas looked at her in confusion, wondering what the question was. He wasn't the one who needed cancer treatment, so what was she asking? He wondered and looked at her when she giggled.
"Your face is so preciously expressive. I was asking if you have a bucket list," She said, and Lucas sighed inwardly. How could she have expected him to know that was her question?
Lucas shook his head, "I don't think I do."
"Yeah. I didn't either until I realized I was going to die. We always think we have so much time to live and do all the things we want, so we don't give much thought to those things we really desire," she said thoughtfully.
"What is on your bucket list?" Lucas asked curiously.
"Lots of ridiculous stuff, I assure you," she said with an embarrassed giggle that made Lucas smile involuntarily. She seemed like a delightful person when she wasn't being annoyingly bossy.
"Now I think I'm curious," Lucas said, wondering what it was that could possibly make someone like her look so embarrassed.
"I'm too embarrassed to tell it to you right now. I'll tell you about it later," she promised as she reached for her pack of cigarettes which was on the table.
Lucas was quick to grab it before she could, and she raised a brow, "What?"
"I think maybe you should give up smoking now..."
"Why? Don't tell me you are going to say smoking is bad for my health or something," she said sarcastically.
"Or at least do me a favor and don't smoke when I'm with you," Lucas said as he pocketed it.
"Why?" She asked, and Lucas' dimples winked at her.
"Because smoking is bad for your health," he said with a grin, and she laughed softly.
"Don't be ridiculous. I'm dying. There's health to preserve. So you'll have to let me indulge myself," she said as she held out a hand to him.
"Sorry, not giving it back. Tell me more about yourself. You know about me, but I don't even know anything apart from your name and your relationship with Rachel and my sister's secretary," Lucas said, and Miley sighed as she withdrew her hand and relaxed on the couch.
"My family owns Oasis Hotel..."
"Oasis?" Lucas asked since he knew they were currently in the Oasis hotel. This was the biggest hotel in the country, and he knew they had branches in different parts of the world.
"Yeah. It has been passed down from generation to generation. It was supposed to be passed to me," she said with a wistful smile.
"As I mentioned before, I studied outside the country. I studied hotel management, and I've since been overseeing some of the branches abroad since then," she said, and Lucas nodded.
"And you don't have a man in your life, do you?" Lucas asked, and she blinked back in surprise at the sudden expected question.
"I've never had the time to be in a stable relationship because I had to travel around too often to take care of business. It is one of those things I kept putting off for later. May I ask why you asked such a personal question?"
"Apart from the fact that you know about my relationship, while I know nothing about yours, I wanted to understand why you would rather spend your time with a stranger than your partner," Lucas explained.
"I don't have one. And that is why one of the things on my bucket list is to get married and have a child before I die."
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