Ali listened intently as Omar began telling him about the love of his life, Faten.
For him, she had converted to Islam and their life was blissful. Perfect. He had a perfect wife, a perfect family. Then, he got promoted and went overseas for a job.
After a while, his performance made him well-known. People sought after him. Flinging money at him. He saw his family less and less as he dove into work. He had been so engrossed with earning money for his family that he neglected the very people he was working so hard for!
How ironic.
It was only after his wife filed for divorce that he woke up.
From a dream, to a nightmare. No matter what he did, he couldn't salvage the situation. His wife was adamant and distant, while his children loathed him. He fell into despair.
Just as he signed the divorce papers, he drowned himself in work.
Yet ... miracles of miracles, three months later, the love of his life came back.
She told him about this job offer. However, if he was to take up that offer, all the things he achieved currently would be gone for he would need to move to an obscure place. At half the pay with twice the work. His position was also far lower than what he was holding on to now.
The only thing was, it was at home. To be exact, where his family and ex-wife lived.
She asked him simply, "Are you willing?"
Even though they had divorced, Omar never lost hope. Seeing her there, asking him this, he made his decision without a thought. He resigned and followed her home.
Once he arrived, he started work like normal. He didn't care that he started from the bottom again. He did his best to repair his life with his family. Even though he was no longer the husband, he was still a father. And she was still the mother of his children.
After?fourth months,?his ex-wife finally told him that it was okay. That he was forgiven.
And that she had never filed the divorce papers.
Now, his life was perfect again. He even had more children after getting back together again.
????
Ali looked confused.
Sure, Omar's life story was really touching and beautiful, but how was that related to what he was experiencing? Omar seemed to be focusing on how his marriage was saved, rather than how he managed to 'capture' his wife.
Why did she convert? How did he convince her?
Omar saw the confusion on Ali's face and he smiled again.
"In my life story, who was the one that was in the wrong the first time? The one that shattered the bonds of marriage?" Omar asked softly.
Embarrassed, Ali still answered, "You."
"Yes, and who was the one that converted? Who was the one that remained true to the Faith?" he asked again.
Ali blinked.
"Yes, it was my wife," Omar said with a gentle smile, "When a girl truly loves you, she will convert for you."
"But ... I don't really need her to convert now, do I?" Ali said.
It was one of the things that he had been thinking hard about. Why should he insist that Sophia believe in what he did, if he could marry her anyway? As long as there is love, isn't it enough?
Despite the fact that he had first felt it would be great that she converted, as time went by ... he began questioning it. Since it was allowed, why should he be so particular about it?
Omar shook his head.
"It is not that simple," he said.
"It's not?" Ali asked, surprised and not understanding.
"It is said that a Muslim man can marry a non-Muslim woman," Omar continued, "That is a fallacy due to its inaccuracy."
"What do you mean?"
"Yes, it is true that you can marry a non-muslim woman. However, only one who is Kitabiyah."
"A 'person of the book?"* Ali repeated and understanding dawned in his eyes. So, Sophia wouldn't 'qualify', so to speak. She was not a?Kitabiyah.
"Even then, it is still highly discouraged," Omar stressed, "My Faten was Kitabiyah but she still converted for me. She loved me wholeheartedly. She didn't fail me. I failed her."
His eyes had a faraway look in them.
"For me, I did not do much in terms of 'persuading' her, so to speak," Omar explained, "She learns on her own. She asked me things. This is all-natural as she wants to know more about you, and what makes you, you."
"A woman is like that. When she loves, she loves wholeheartedly."
Omar looked at Ali squarely in the eyes, "It is the Man that often fails her. You are to be her pillar, and you must never, ever forget that. You are her protector, and you must care for her unconditionally. She is your wife, and the mother of your children. She is the pillar of the family and you, as her husband, must always, always, protect her."
"So I ask you this," Omar continued, "What have you done so far to prove yourself worthy of this woman, to convert for you?"
Ali was stumped.
He looked down, thinking hard.
"I .. I treat her well," he began hesitatingly, "I don't scold her or look at other women."
"Who are you to scold her?" Omar countered, "Is she your daughter?"
Ali shook his head, confused.
"You are to be her protector, not her father!" Omar stressed, tapping the table, "What has our religion taught you? Have you been following its teachings? Its commandments? On how to treat your wife?"
"But she's not my wife," Ali mumbled.
"Do you not want her to be? Why are you with her then? As a passing phase?"
At that, Ali lost it, "NO! My feelings are true! I ..."
"Then why aren't you treating her like she is your wife?" Omar asked again.
Ali was still confused. What's his point?
Omar sighed loudly.
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