Naruto: Konoha’s Kanpu

‘Who am I?’

‘Where am I?’

‘What am I doing?’

In a daze, Naruto climbed up from the snow, looking confused at the nearby Kanpū and Hinata beside him, and Sakura’s group of three, who were still staring at Sasuke's departing figure obsessedly.

“Not good, Naruto’s brain got kicked out.” Kanpū quickly checked on him.

Hinata was also terrified and looked at him with a worried look: “Naruto, Naruto, are you okay? can you hear me? Do you remember what just happened?”

“Kanpū-sensei, that… wait a minute.”

Naruto somewhat resisted Kanpū’s inspection, but then, in the next moment, he suddenly remembered what had just happened and shouted, “I remember! That guy Sasuke… Huh, where is he?”

Kanpū was relieved after finished checking and confirmed that Naruto was fine, and then he said: “He ran away after finished showing off.”

Naruto became angry for a while, and then he was puzzled and said, “Kanpū-sensei, I obviously defeated Sasuke, but why did he suddenly become stronger in the end? Did he really hide his strength at the beginning?”

“Of course not, he suddenly became stronger because you stimulated him too much and made him awaken his Sharingan.”

Kanpū lectured solemnly, “Naruto, if you didn't talk so much, worked hard silently, and knocked Sasuke out directly, then he wouldn't have awakened his Sharingan and turned defeat into victory. So, remember, villains die from talking too much, you must remember this.”

Naruto nodded in confusion, then suddenly grasped the point: “Kanpū-sensei, am I a villain?”

“It's the same for heroes.” Kanpū said.

Naruto nodded as if he understood.

Kanpū patted Naruto on the shoulder, hoping he could really listen.

In the original work, although Sasuke’s showing off is annoying, Naruto’s Talk-no-Jutsu is equally uncomfortable. Once he starts speaking, he would always be babbling on and on, dragging out a single episode for 20 minutes!

After Sasuke left, Sakura and Ino had no reason to stay either, so they soon bid farewell.

Although Naruto still wanted Sakura to linger a bit longer, considering that he had just been defeated by Sasuke, he couldn't bear the embarrassment, so he reluctantly watched his goddess slowly leave.

“Naruto, stop looking. A girlfriend isn't obtained by licking, it's about attracting. Do you understand? Sasuke can attract so many girls because he's really good at pretending. By pretending to be someone he's not, he attracts those naive girls.”

As the conversation reached this point, Kanpū felt a cold murderous intent coming from the side.

‘Oops, I forgot that Karin hadn't left yet.’

Their sibling relationship was about to break down… But Kanpū was annoyed by Naruto's appearance and chose to ignore Karin, continuing to lecture, “Naruto, look at yourself again. You lack style, taste, and even hairstyle. You're just a big round lump. How can you attract those girls like this?”

“Kanpū-sensei……”

Naruto looked back at Kanpū incredulously. Then, he immediately rushed over with teary eyes, “Kanpū-sensei, help me~~”

“You have to help me, I want to reach the top~”

Kanpū waved his hand calmly and said, “First of all, you need Pinru’s wardrobe.” (T/N: The words Pinru’s wardrobe has no meaning in itself. It only appeared as a famous sentence in the TV series, The Temptation of Going Home and became an Internet buzzword. You can only say "Why are you wearing Pinru's clothes", which means "You are so coquettish".)

‘Who is Pinru?’

Naruto looked at him in confusion.

But at this moment, Karin, whose sibling relationship was breaking down, interrupted them with a cold sneer: “Big brother, you can’t even find a girlfriend yourself, so stop misleading others.”

Kanpū’s face twitched at this: ‘I can’t find girlfriend?’

‘What’s the joke?!’

‘I’d rather stay single than settle for less!’

‘I refuse to settle!’

‘Furthermore, haven't I been licking Terumi Mei?’

‘And I'll soon have her in my arms!’

Thinking about it this way, Kanpū feels something was off.

‘Forget it, let's get Naruto Pinru’s wardrobe first!’

“Since tomorrow is the New Year, let's end the training here.”

Kanpū casually glanced at Naruto's dull brown coat and said, “Let's go, buy some clothes.”

With Naruto and the other two in tow, Kanpū returned to the village. Then, their group plunged into the bustling commercial street, starting their shopping trip.

……

On the other side.

After Sasuke got home, he ran to the backyard excitedly, but his big brother wasn't there.

He then ran to the study, but his father wasn't there either.

He ran to the kitchen, and his mother was also absent.

‘Sigh, why aren't they back yet?’

Sasuke looked upset. At this time, he eagerly wanted to share his journey of awakening the Sharingan with his family.

He sat alone in the backyard pavilion, boredly watching as the snow gradually covered the rockery, ponds, and walls. As noon approached, Sasuke suddenly heard faint voices coming from the entrance.

‘Big brother is back!’

Sasuke jumped up and ran to the entrance, then…

‘Who is this woman?!’

Sasuke looked at the woman who was chatting and laughing with his brother at the entrance, his hands clenched, his teeth grinding, his whole appearance turning sour!!

‘I… I was fighting with Naruto in the morning. If I hadn't activated the Sharingan at a critical moment, I would have been defeated by that lowest ranking, and our Uchiha Clan’s pride would have been trampled under his feet.

‘I fought a bloody battle to uphold the glory of our clan, but you, big brother, are chatting and laughing with a woman I don't know…’

‘And… You've never smiled so happily when talking to me!!!’

Thinking of how many times Itachi apologized to him, said sorry, had something else to do, or promised next time, Sasuke felt utterly hopeless: ‘As expected, Big brother doesn’t love me at all…’

(╥╯^╰╥)

Sasuke turned dejectedly and walked towards the backyard.

“Sasuke, you're back so early.”

Itachi turned around when he heard the movement, and said with a slight smile, “Let me introduce you, this is…”

“I don’t want to know her!!” Sasuke roared angrily, then ran into the house with small steps.

???

Itachi had a big question mark above his head.

“Pfftt~ ~hahaha.”

Izumi covered her mouth and chuckled, “Itachi, your little brother is so cute.”

Itachi frowned slightly, his forehead lines deepening, and he says, “Sorry, I've spoiled Sasuke too much.”

“Idiot, didn't you notice?” Izumi looked at him with shining eyes.

“Notice… what?” Itachi felt like his IQ had been demoted by a level.

“Your little brother is jealous~” Izumi said with a laugh.

“Jealous?”

Itachi was full of disbelief, “Jealous… of you? How could he…”

“I think your little brother is probably too dependent on you, so when he sees you with a new friend, he feels like he's going to be taken away by someone else, so he got mad at you just now.” Izumi explained.

Itachi thinks about it carefully, and felt that it seems that this might be the case. He sighed deeply and said: “Izumi…”

“I understand, I won’t be angry.” Izumi waved her hand, “Then, I’ll go first.”

“Goodbye.” Itachi escorted her to the door.

“By the way, we… the evening date…” Izumi lowered her head, her pretty face blushing.

“I will come.” Itachi said solemnly, “Don’t worry.”

“Mm.”

After Izumi left, Itachi went to the backyard, only to be greeted by a large snowball.

Itachi instinctively dodged to the side, then turned his head to look, and saw Sasuke standing in the backyard, picking up snowballs and throwing them at him.

A slight smile appeared on Itachi's lips, tinged with a hint of tenderness. This time, he did not dodge, allowing the snowballs to hit him.

After a while, Sasuke felt distressed, so he ran over with tears in his eyes and questioned: “Big brother, why didn't you dodge?”

“Are you still angry?” Itachi asked with a smile.

Sasuke pouted: “Big brother, that woman… she… I… Big brother, do you not want me anymore?”

“Idiot, you're my little brother, I will always take care of you and I will never abandon you.” Itachi said seriously.

“Big brother…” Sasuke’s eyes were filled with moved tears. He threw himself into Itachi's arms and choked for a while before lifting his head, “Then Big brother, can you accompany me to admire the moon tonight? I have a surprise for you!”

“Ummm……” Itachi hesitated for a moment, then shook his head slowly, “Sorry, I have an important mission at night.”

“But Big brother, aren't you on vacation?” Sasuke looked at him suspiciously.

“It is a temporary mission added by Captain Kanpū.” Itachi said expressionlessly.

“I see…” Sasuke lowered his head aggrievedly.

Seeing this, Itachi felt guilty in his heart: ‘Sorry, Sasuke, this is the last time, I promise!’

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