My Daughters Are Regressors

༺ All Thieves Are Bad People! (3) ༻

Near the Duchy of Freesia, there was a hideout where thieves gathered.

New Kowloon mountains.

A kingdom of sin that the heinous bandit ‘Jack the Ripper’ formed by assembling villains through money-making schemes.

But that kingdom was wiped out overnight by a meteor strike.

“It was divine retribution.”

“They even stole our sheep. The bastards.”

“So now it’s being maintained by the Freesian soldiers?”

The hideout which was demolished by the meteor was indeed under the watch of Freesian soldiers stationed there, as the people said.

So it should have been.

Rustle—

“Hey, Hans. Did you hear something?”

“The ghost of a thief, probably. One that died from the meteor.”

“Really…?”

“Of course not! Stop messing around and stay on guard properly!”

Within the darkness and shadows, forms began to move and steal into the Kowloon mountains which had now become a tactical location for the soldiers.

They were dark like the night, making them hardly visible, and their feet did not make a sound.

Shshk— Shshshshk—

They congregated in the basement shelter hidden within the Kowloon mountains.

It was basically the secret room of ‘Jack the Ripper’ who had once been the master of these mountains.

Eight shadows gathered in the room hidden so deeply underground that even the soldiers who had combed through the whole area could not find it.

“Ran here like all your asses were on fire, eh.”

“Everyone saw the message on the flier, right? ‘Come to the dragon’s belly’, it said.”

“Meaning the underground of the Kowloon mountains. If you can’t even read this, it’s time to retire and go to prison.”

“… To me, someone who wants to be a thief.”

“Ah fuck, hard to tell everyone apart with you all in the shadows. How about we reveal ourselves?”

Clamor— Clamor—

The basement room with a single table was fairly noisy.

It was a given with very vocal criminals loitering in one place.

“Why were we called? Is there a point to this meeting? Do you know how hard it was to get here?”

“Don’t like it, then leave. You’re a pirate, aren’t you? You stink of salt!”

“Hehe, you must a be woman. Smells like girly perfume. And apples, too. How about it, should we cast off the shadows and introduce ourselves?”

As things were getting heated, someone showed up.

She was a thief who wasn’t hiding in the shadows.

Merely had her face covered with a black veil.

At the entrance of one of the most famous thieves, all shadows shrugged their shoulders or whistled.

“Whoa, the Back Alley Princess has arrived.”

“Can she still be called a princess? With her father dead, she pretty much has no strings attached.”

“You mean she’s at a loose end. Wow, what a dumbass.”

“Quiet. If you don’t shut up, I won’t talk.”

Salome put a finger to her mouth.

It was like how she dealt with noisy children drawing break time.

But it was more effective than expected.

All eight thieves from the different regions shut their mouths.

Of course, it wasn’t that Salome was threatening.

They were only curious about what she had to say.

“I’m sure you’re all wondering as to why we’re here. Honestly, I don’t have the answer. It wasn’t me who called you but Judas. That’s why you came in the first place.”

“So then, where is that Judas?”

Tuk—

Someone put their arm on the table.

Though the rest was hidden in the darkness, it was a man smelling strongly of the sea.

“It’s a bit rude to call on busy people to come urgently and then be late to the gathering.”

Click—

At some point, the hand on the table was loaded with a gun.

It was tense like there would be an immediate firing.

At the menacing killing intent, everyone else reached for their weapons at the waist or inside the sleeves.

If needed, they would start killing one another.

Another reason why the Night Lords didn’t gather was due to these violent tendencies.

In a meeting of the Lords, someone always dies.

“Good to know that everyone’s so energetic”

Shshshk—

Just then, someone appeared at the table they were all surrounding.

He stood atop the table, startling the surrounding shadows into stepping back, shaking their heads and flinching.

“Whoa.”

“Shit, what the hell.”

“That scared me.”

“You got scared from that? I’m the one who called you; the 13th Judas. One, two, three—eight. All eight of you, then. I see some new faces, some familiar ones.”

The man didn’t even have a mask on.

His black eyes glittered like obsidian in the darkness.

The show of vulnerability was likely some kind of trap.

At the unexpected appearance, everyone was tense.

“Haha! Die!”

Bang—!

Right then, someone fired their musket.

The lead bullet spun like a whirlpool.

It sped towards the latecomer’s heart but it was stopped by a finger.

Whirl— Whirl—

The bullet that was spinning against the man’s fingertip lost its rotational force and dropped to the table.

The pirate 「Blackbeard」 was slightly taken aback.

He didn’t think that his 「Spiral Bullet」 pre-emptive attack that killed many would be blocked by merely a finger.

“Suddenly firing at someone who’s talking? I’ll let it pass since I anticipated as much. But there won’t be a second time, so watch yourself.”

“…….”

“Why I called all of you here is to request something. There’s an object I need to steal.”

A request.

At his words, the shadows wavered like a candlelight.

Soon, a shadow retreated, revealing the pirate Blackbeard whose bullet was stopped.

Wearing a sea-worn navy-colored navy uniform, along with a pointy captain’s hat and a full-grown mustache, he made quite the impression as a middle-aged man.

“A request. You called all of us here for a request? What, you want to steal a country or something? Or the throne of Freesia?”

“No.”

As the King of Thieves shook his head, someone slid out of the darkness into the room.

It was a woman with red hair tied back and in light attire like a runner’s.

“You are….”

“I’m Atlante. You’d understand if I said the thief who stole the golden apple from the Demiurge Azketh, right? The world’s ‘most’ famous female thief.”

The golden apple thief Atlante spoke as she glared at Salome.

Salome simply snorted.

“A golden apple, I can steal one of those anytime I want.”

Crackle— Crackle—

After a long glaring match between the two women, Atlante turned away first.

She then proceeded to speak.

“I don’t know what you want to ask, but I’ll decline. I only wanted to see what the new Judas looked like. It’s okay to decline, right?”

“Sure. Then you’ll be sent to join The Ripper who used to be this place’s master. I don’t really like thieves. If you guys are around, it won’t be a good learning environment.”

The Ripper.

At the name Judas mentioned, everyone became wary.

Jack the Ripper.

The man who was once a Night Lord and a sworn brother to the King of Thieves, Herod.

He was unfortunately struck and killed by a meteor—was the rumor going around everywhere, but none of the thieves here believed it.

And this confirmed it.

The one who killed Jack was the man on the table.

‘Will I need to fight against him if I refuse?’

Atlante assessed the level of Judas, the King of Thieves.

He seemed an ordinary person with a little bit of training, but it was probably a sort of cheap deception.

Defeating the King of Thieves, subjugating the Demon King… The many rumors about him were so unbelievable that it was difficult to gauge his skill properly.

But the level of danger rose when he was able to, with a finger, stop the bullet that Blackbeard shot to test him.

‘I didn’t even sense him until he appeared on the table. This man, he feels more like a shadow than a human being. And most of all….’

Atlante shifted her gaze to Salome.

A famous female thief like herself.

The fact that a catty woman like her was staying quiet in this situation.

‘It would be foolish to just go for it without thinking.’

One of the most important skills of a thief is survival ‘instincts’.

None of her instincts said that they would be able to defeat this man even if they teamed up against him.

As hard to believe as that was.

So, Atlante just decided to ask.

“Then, let’s hear what this request is about.”

* * *

Criminals don’t follow any rules.

That’s why they’re criminals.

Even if you have them in one place, it only increases chaos and destruction.

And that was the reality now.

Firing a gun without warning.

Of course, it had been useless but it was still annoying.

But, it seemed that these Thief Lords were willing to listen better than I thought.

“Let’s hear what this request is about.”

At the female thief’s question, I took a moment.

Request.

The world’s best thieves were obviously all gathered in one place ‘because there was something to steal.’

And that something had been decided a long time ago.

“We’re stealing the Throne of God. We’re dragging Nocturne down from the stars above.”

“The t-throne of a god…?”

“… He’s completely whack.”

“That guy, annoying….”

“Haha, what a weirdo.”

Such strange reactions.

Wasn’t it better than just saying I needed them to kill a moron?

I thought it was a pretty cool line.

“Stealing a Deity’s throne! What complete nonsense!”

“Is the 13th Judas a romanticist?”

“I come all this way and what a joke I hear!”

Everyone started laughing uproariously.

But, well, it was a reasonable reaction.

If I heard someone say that sincerely, I would’ve laughed, too.

Of course, to these guys, it wasn’t important ‘what’ they were stealing.

And stealing a god’s throne?

That kind of vague idea wasn’t really relevant to them.

A treasure to steal and obtain was something tangible, like shining gold ingots and coins, beautiful women, etc.

I also know this as an inherent thief.

As such—

To these materialistic people, this was the main thing.

─Reward.

“The「Skeleton Key」.”

At this, all the noisily clamoring thieves, villains, pirates, and ruffians fell silent as if on cue.

Dead silence.

When it flooded the space like water, Salome spoke up in shock.

“Judas, what do you mean the 「Skeleton Key」…!”

“Exactly as I said. The King of Thieves’ treasure. The legendary grand secret treasure that can open every lock and door in the world. Snix’s Skeleton Key. That’s the reward for this request.”

“Lies!”

Bang—!

At that moment, someone slammed on the table.

It was the pirate Blackbeard.

“How will you guarantee that you’ll keep that promise?”

“I swear. On the almighty 「Thieves’ Codex」. The shadow codex that all unruly thieves must follow.”

Swoosh—

I reached into my shadow and pulled out a thick book.

It was incredibly bulky.

This was the ‘shadow codex’ that I was talking about.

The book was filled with laws that thieves must obey.

It was the book that I was reading when Salome came to me tonight.

“Paragraph 5 here says that any promises sworn on the code of law must be fulfilled. If not, you will be cursed by goddess Snix.”

Flap—

I opened the thick book and showed them.

As I did that, the thieves around the table were impressed.

“The Thief’s Codex…. It’s my first time. So that’s the actual book.”

“I heard that the Kings are permitted to change the contents of the book.”

“That’s why they’re called the King of Thieves. To be exact, the owner of this shadow codex is the one who becomes King. So it was in the hands of the 13th Judas, after all.”

“Look here! Paragraph 12! 「Upon receiving ransom for kidnapped children, you must return them-」 Article! It’s the article written by the 7th Judas!”

“If you’re a thief, you have to uphold everything in the code of laws, right? Or else you’ll be cursed by goddess Snix? Is that really true?”

They were all fascinated by it.

Anyway.

I closed the book and secured it with a padlock.

“I’ll tell you now, the only way to unlock this is Snix’s 「Skeleton Key」 And if this task is successfully accomplished, I’ll give you the secret map to the key’s location.”

At that, Salome asked in surprise.

“Judas, you. That means…. You’re going to step down as the King of Thieves.”

“Yeah, because if you succeed then I’ll no longer be a thief. Hence that position should be passed on to the next person. Anyway, are you willing to listen now?”

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