Maybe a Fake Gintama
Chapter 453: Things Like Domestic Cats Turning Into Stray Cats Also Happen Occasionally!Maybe a Fake Gintama Chapter 453 Things Like Domestic Cats Turning Into Stray Cats Also Happen Occasionally!
"Gintoki, are you sure you don't want to eat these fries anymore?" Katsura glanced at the French fries on the ground in front of Gintoki.
"What do you want to do?" Gintoki said with a face full of contempt, "Are you still planning to eat it?!"
"Throwing away food casually like you are not a true samurai." Katsura shook his head and sighed. At the same time, he quietly stretched out his claws and reached for the last french fries.
"Wait a minute! Katsura!" Kondo suddenly said, "There are regulations in the Shinsengumi. Shinsengumi team members are not allowed to waste food! You must pick up the French fries when you see them on the ground and eat them! Even if you violate the three-second rule, it is the same! Violators commit seppuku! So... "
As he said that, Kondo reached out his hand to the French fries on the ground, "Leave this to me! Katsura!"
"How can there be such a rule!" Katsura cursed and then began to compete with Kondo.
"There is one now!" Kondo retorted angrily, "Because I am the Shinsengumi Chief! What the Chief says is the law of the Shinsengumi!"
"Bastard! Don't even think about getting away with it!"
Gintoki looked at Kondo and Katsura who were fighting because of a French fries on the ground. After a long silence, he said, "Are these two guys...really ready to change back?""Gintoki, aren't you joining?" On the side, Kawaki leaned his head against the wall and sat on the ground. He yawned and continued, "It looks quite interesting. It can be used as a bedtime program before taking a nap after eating and drinking."
Hearing this, several red "#" characters instantly appeared on Gintoki's forehead. He then said angrily, "Do you believe I'll kill you right now?! You fucking idiot! Who would do that kind of thing like the two of them?! Stop joking around! It's better to starve to death than to do that kind of thing for a piece of French fries!"
"Then just wait and slowly starve to death."
Before Gintoki could finish speaking, Houichi's voice came from behind him, and at the same time, there was the sound of something falling to the ground.
The three cats and one gorilla heard the sound and turned their heads, only to see Houichi squatting on the empty ground behind the three of them, and there was a dead mouse on the ground in front of Houichi.
"Hou...Houichi!"
"That kind of boring self-esteem is completely useless to those who seek survival here." As he spoke, Houichi directly lowered his head and picked up the mouse on the ground. Then, he raised his head and started chewing.
"Hey... wait..." Just as Kawaki was about to say something, Houichi had already swallowed the mouse.
"All we need here is the self-esteem needed to survive." After burping, Houichi stared at them, spat the mouse tail stuck in his teeth, and said, "Anyone with the guts to survive, come with me."
After saying that, Houichi turned around and was about to leave.
"Wait a minute!" Kawaki stood up and raised his claws to stop him, "Before that, there's something important that I hope you can listen to for a moment."
"What? Are you angry with what I just said and want to refute it? Cat... No, p*ssy." Houichi snorted coldly. After he stopped, he turned around and stared coldly at Kawaki and the others.
"No, it's not that." Kawaki shook his head, then pointed to the mouse's tail on the ground and continued, "Houichi, the mouse you ate just now has signs of mold and fester [there]."
"Eh?" Houichi was stunned.
"Ah, yes, maybe you didn't see it clearly, but we did see it." Gintoki nodded and then raised his front paw to point at the part of Kondo's mosaic, "It feels more serious than this gorilla. It feels like it has been infected with some serious virus. A very special kind of virus related to [there]."
"Eh?" Houichi uttered again.
"Yes, I also found out." Katsura nodded, "At that time, I wanted to stop Houichi-dono, but Houichi-dono was too fast."
"Are you okay?" Kawaki said worriedly, "If you are infected with that kind of virus, your thing will also fester, Houichi!"
"I can't believe you were so careless. Really," Kondo shook his head. Then, he pulled out a tuft of fur from one of his mosaics and handed it to Houichi, "Here, eat this. At this time, we can only fight poison with poison."
"You should have said this earlier!" Houichi snapped back to reality and shouted while clutching his throat with his claws.
"No, I stopped you at that time." Kawaki replied helplessly, "But your speed is too fast. Before I could finish speaking, you swallowed the [poisonous] mouse. But then again, it seems that the mouse is not a good mouse."
"Σ_(´ཀ`」 ∠)Blargh...."
In the end, after endless effort, Houichi vomited the mouse that he had eaten before he was infected by some suspicious virus. Everything was fine, and everything was going well! Congratulations!
...
In a small alley, Kawaki, Kondo, and the others were slowly walking behind Houichi.
"Well, is my previous method really not good?" Kawaki said as he walked, "But I personally feel that it is quite useful. Let Zura and Gintoki go out as bait to lure the humans into an empty alley. I and the Gorilla will fight to get their money. After that, we will swagger into the restaurant to order what we like. If there is any money left, we can go to a pet shop for grooming and maintenance."
"What's wrong with your head?" Gintoki asked, "Why did you become a bandit after you turned into a cat? Why did you become a robber after you turned into a cat? Have you been to a pet shop before?"
"Yes." Kawaki nodded, "I met Houichi on the first day I became a cat. As a courtesy, I treated him to a meal and invited him to a pet shop to take a shower and comb his hair."
"You... are really amazing..." Gintoki silently retorted.
"Isn't it good to do this to humans who have ill intentions towards us?" Kawaki said indifferently.
"That's right! I agree!" Kondo indignantly agreed, "This kind of punishment is understandable for those hateful humans who covet our bananas! By the way, is the lady in the pet shop really that gentle?!"
"The only thing you care about is a girl!" Gintoki rolled his eyes and scolded, "And I already told you! No one coveted your dirty banana!"
"Kawaki, what should we do with the bait?" Katsura looked at Kawaki and asked, "Also...is that lady married?"
"Do you want to go too?!" Gintoki shouted, but then his tone changed and he looked at Kawaki, "Can the hair care make curly hair smooth?"
Kawaki, "..."
"Don't do that kind of thing again, Kawa." Houichi, who was walking in the front, stopped and said without looking back, "It may not matter to you, a cat. However, if more and more of those things happen and the whole street starts to talk about it, the ending will become worse. At that time, the conflict between the people on this street and the stray cats will become irreconcilable. If this continues, the stray cats may never survive on this street."
Kawaki stopped where he was. He lowered his head and thought quietly for a moment. Then, he suddenly thought of something. He raised his head, nodded, and said seriously, "Indeed, that kind of thing really can't be done anymore. Sorry, I was too narrow-minded before."
"It's good that you can understand." After saying this, Houichi stood up again and walked forward.
"So, the next time you do that, won't it be fine if you don't show mercy?" Kawaki continued, "If no one is left alive, the story about the cat robbing money will not spread...Alright, let's do that! Gintoki, Zura, you two will be the bait. I will hide here with the gorilla!"
"No way!" Houichi stopped again, turned around, and shouted crazily, "What the hell is going on with your head?! Do you want to become a murderer?! Have you changed from robbery to murder and robbery?!"
"Huh? Can't I?" Kawaki asked doubtfully, "Isn't it the norm in nature that the weak should eat the strong?"
"No!" Houichi shouted.
"Alright! If we can't kill them, we can only control the intensity until they forget the memory of this incident. At that level, there should be no problem." Kawaki stood up and supported his chin with his paw, thinking, "Commonly known as [the plan to make the person who was robbed forget what happened], or simply [the mind-stealing plan]!"
"What kind of abbreviation is that!" Gintoki stood up, raised his foot, and kicked Kawaki's butt, "And how do I control myself to make a person lose his memory of being robbed?!"
"No, isn't this kind of thing quite common?" Kawaki got up and explained, "In the Men In Black."
"Oh!" Katsura exclaimed, "The memory eraser used by the agents seems to work really well! Just press it and you can reset people's memories of seeing the aliens!"
"I'm going to Hollywood now! You guys wait for me here!" Kondo volunteered.
"What happened to the heads of the three of you?!" Gintoki hugged his head and shouted frantically, "Who... who will save the heads of the three of them!"
"Gorilla, help me get an autograph from Tommy Lee Jones," Kawaki suddenly thought of something and continued, "Remember to ask him to write [for Kawaki-kun] under the sign."
"I want Will Smith," Katsura continued, "Just write [Given to fan Katsura Kotarou] on the back. By the way, if possible, please let him draw a heart. This is a sincere request from a samurai, please! Kondo-dono!"
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