Maybe a Fake Gintama Chapter 389 Don't Underestimate Artists' Survival!
"... Also, the song given by the producer..." As he spoke, Otsuu turned her face away in embarrassment. With a slightly red face, she pouted and continued, "It's the kind of song that is all [Bleep——], and more than half of the lyrics are [Bleep——]. I also want to sing those inspirational and youthful songs not those [Bleep——]. It's really distressing~"
'What the hell are you distressed about? Speaking of which, it's you! It's you! It's you who sang those things in reality! Why do you push the blame onto someone else?' Kawaki thought to himself, 'Isn't it too late to complain in this kind of place? Is it too late to restore your innocent image, right?!'
"It's really distressing~" Otsuu pretended to be troubled. Then, she stretched out her index finger and gently placed it in her mouth, "Should I discuss it with the producer? I heard from the seniors that the producer seems to only stay in the private office on the top floor. If he steps out of the room, he will vomit blood and die~"
'What the hell is this setting? I can only stay here? Will I die if I go out? With the setting being like this, how am I supposed to woo her? The plot can't go on!' Kawaki was in a bad mood, but then he suddenly thought of something, and the corners of his mouth curved up. He thought, 'No! This is it! So that's how it is! Now I completely understand! As long as she steps into my room, it will be considered a success! I already understand the direction of the plot! Come on! Send out all your usual complaints!'
"But..." As she said that, Otsuu once again felt a little disappointed, "My thirty-eight bedridden younger brothers might not be able to pay for their medical expenses... If the sudden change in style causes the popularity to drop, my thirty-eight younger brothers might..."
'So why must there be thirty-eight younger brothers?!' Kawaki crazily complained in his heart, 'Your mother is too good at giving birth, right? No matter how you think about it, it's impossible! It's impossible to give birth to one every year!'
"My..." Otsuu suddenly lay on the makeup table and sobbed, "... Thirty-eightuplets younger brother... Sister is really distressed..."
'Th-Thirty-eightuplets?!' Kawaki was completely shocked, 'The sextuplets next door are terrible, why did your family directly have thirty-eightuplets?! This is already a miracle! Speaking of delivering the baby, did the doctor fall asleep like counting sheep because of counting the children?!'
"Knock! Knock!" There was a knock on the door of Otsuu's room, and at the same time, the voice of artist A came in."Otsuu-chan, about the announcement of next week's prank variety show, let me inform you and pass on some experience to you by the way."
"Ah, please come in." Otsuu-chan hurriedly wiped the tears from the corners of her eyes.
She adjusted her expression and put on a friendly smile again, looking in the direction of the door.
Artist A pushed open the door with a few pieces of A4 paper, pulled out a chair, and sat down.
"What's wrong? The corners of your eyes are a little red. Are you alright?" The female artist A looked at Otsuu and asked in confusion.
"I'm fine, I'm fine. Maybe I just didn't sleep enough." Otsuu hurriedly replied with a smile.
"It's really the same no matter where we are. The newcomers are just different from us old people. We are really risking our lives!" Artist A said with a sigh.
"It's... not that bad." Otsuu smiled awkwardly, "Talking about the thing senior said just now about next week's prank variety show..."
"Oh, here," as she said, artist A handed some A4 papers in her hand to Otsuu, "You've been in the company for quite some time now. In order to increase your popularity, the company has arranged a variety show for you."
"That, this prank..." Otsuu-chan took the A4 paper from artist A and asked, "You won't do something strange, right?"
"Don't care about that," Artist A waved her hand and said indifferently, "It's actually just a boring thing to say that it's a prank. When the time comes, you can just pretend to be surprised and let the audience see you in shock. In contrast, the audience likes the feeling of contrast. Even if you are not scared, you have to pretend, 'Ah, you scared me to death!', that feeling, understood?
"I understand." Otsuu nodded.
"Um, because it's Otsuu-chan's first time participating in such a program, I have a few questions here." Artist A nodded and asked kindly, "Are you okay with a beer bottle?"
"Beer bottle?" Otsuu was puzzled.
"That's that one." Artist A waved her hand and replied, "It's the scene of being beaten by a beer bottle like in the Damasareta Taishou TV show."
"Oh, what you're talking about is the one that often appears on the Damasareta Taishou TV show. By the way, does the show I'm on also have that kind of segment?" Only then did Otsuu-chan react. She smiled and said, "But from the looks of it, they are all bottles with rough workmanship that break when touched. They don't hurt at all. I think there should be no problem."
"If it's a real beer bottle, how many can you resist?" Artist A said with a serious face.
"Eh?" The expression on Otsuu's face froze in an instant.
'What kind of prank is this? If it's a real beer bottle, she won't be able to withstand a single one!' Kawaki thought frantically, 'Is there really anyone watching this kind of show?! No, can it really be broadcasted?! Woun't it be banned in minutes?!'
Looking at Otsuu-chan's embarrassed expression, Artist A sighed softly and said, "Sure enough, it doesn't work... How about explosives?"
"Explosives?" Otsuu was puzzled.
"It's in the Damasareta Taishou TV show, from the top of the head "Bang!" The kind of explosion." Artist A explained.
"The explosives in the Damasareta Taishou TV show seem to only be loud, but they basically don't have any power, right? Then there is no problem." Otsuu replied with a smile.
"Real explosives, how many can you withstand? How about a hundred?" Artist A asked again.
"Eh?" Otsuu-chan's expression froze once again.
'Can't do it! Not even one! It's going to kill her!' Kawaki cursed in his heart.
Looking at Otsuu-chan's embarrassed expression, the female artist asked again, "Why aren't you speaking? Can't you?"
"It doesn't seem to work, it looks like someone will die," Otsuu-chan revealed with an awkward but polite smile.
"Eh? Will someone die?" The female artist A asked in confusion.
'There is no need to ask this kind of question! It is obvious that someone will die! How can there be a show of using real explosives to torture people!' Kawaki silently complained in his heart.
"Probably... maybe..." Otsuu stammered and replied.
"Is that so?" Asked Artist A, "How would I know if you don't try?"
Otsuu was silent...
'You don't need to try to know about this, right?' Kawaki thought frantically, 'Can we get to the point? Aren't you my helper? Aren't you the ones who would send her to me?!'
Looking at Otsuu's awkward expression again, Artist A thought of something and sighed again, "I know, I know. If the explosives are not good, then what about the gasoline? How much can you drink?"
"Well... about three liters..." Otsuu-chan subconsciously replied, but then she reacted and hurriedly changed her words, "Gasoline? No, no! Absolutely not! Not even one mouthful!"
"Petty~" Artist A frowned and complained.
However, Otsuu-chan once again lowered her head and fell silent.
'Is this a question of pettiness?!' Kawaki had the urge to smash the wall, 'Is there really such a prank?! Real beer bottles, real explosives, and then let people drink gasoline? Stop joking! This is no longer a prank, right? It should be "The Dead Man Show", right? Holding a program aimed at killing people, right?!
"Otsuu-chan, you should understand after you become an artist, right?" Artist A sighed, her tone somewhat resentful.
"What?" Otsuu was puzzled.
"For an artist, the most important thing is human temperament," Artist A continued earnestly, "And being on a variety show is a good way to increase your popularity. As long as the viewership ratings are high, your popularity will rise like a rocket."
"Huh?"
"If you can't do this, the audience won't be satisfied. You entered the industry late, so this is basically the situation now." Artist A had a serious expression on her face.
"This... this is really an incredible situation..." The corners of Otsuu-chan's mouth twitched unconsciously.
"But then again, explosives are not good, gasoline is also not good, then what is good? Can you walk through the mountain of sword barefoot? Can you drink boiling water?" Artist A asked.
"I feel that it's a little difficult..." The corners of Otsuu-chan's mouth twitched, and she revealed an awkward smile.
"Then how about waking up." Artist A nodded and suggested.
"I always feel that the style has suddenly become ordinary." Otsuu-chan silently retorted.
"When you were asleep, a cameraman walks in while you're sleeping and you're taken aback." Artist A explained.
"But... no matter what, I am still a girl. Is this really okay?"
"Occasionally, you have to give some benefits to those fans who like you," Artist A replied disapprovingly, "Kick open the hem of your pajamas, reveal your thighs or something."
"But..." Otsuu blushed, lowered her head, and stammered, "I still feel shy..."
"So you have to pretend that you accidentally reveal it. You can't be too deliberate. If you are too deliberate, the audience will think that you are a very frivolous woman. In the end, you have to portray yourself as a somewhat airhead idol." Artist A reminded "In this way, the ratings will definitely rise! Your popularity will also rise rapidly!"
"Yes... Yes, then... if that's the case..."
"En, not bad, not bad." Artist A nodded and praised. Then, she raised her index finger and continued, "Revealing thighs, and then tied up explosives on her body... Bang! Then Otsuu-chan jumped up from the bed in a panic! Perfect!"
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