Life, Once Again!

After Story 28

Maru looked at the students sitting in front of him. They were all overcoming the heavy silence in their own ways. Some made dissatisfied expressions, while some looked down in acceptance.

His eyes landed on the content outline again. He could imagine what happened. Yoonseok should have come up with the story, and they all should have designed the cut together. He could be sure about this because there were different styles of handwriting throughout the content outline.

They should have tried adding various imaginative compositions that they came across in various forms of media until felt satisfied with it, not taking into account how many dozens or hundreds of people were necessary to shoot that one scene.

“Everything moving is money. If you aren’t doing this as a hobby and want results, then you should have been very meticulous at a stage where you don’t need a lot of money. There is no cost to contemplation and imagination, so you must do those things a lot starting now. If you want, I’ll help you to an extent.”

The content of the film was good, to the point Maru felt that it was worth investing his time in. While the videographic beauty might be lacking, there should be some responses if they could get their message across. Of course, it was even more likely that it would get buried without anyone watching it.

“So what do you think? Do you think it’s possible?” Maru asked.

“I’ve heard you say that the story is good, so I can’t give up on it. I’ll try to fix it.”

“Good. Normally, actors shouldn’t interfere like this, but I said a few things because I liked the story. I have no intention of mocking you, so please don’t take it to heart.”

“No, in fact, I’m glad that you were honest. You sound trustworthy. I really want to do this with you.”

Just as Yoonseok reached out his hand, the woman in the room interrupted, “You told us before, right? This is a place where both parties evaluate each other.”

Meaning, since Maru had finished evaluating them, it was time for them to evaluate him.

As Maru was the one who said those words, he nodded.

“Can we have a look at your acting?”

“Jiseon,” Yoonseok tried to hold the woman back.

Maru committed the name Jiseon to memory. She was doing what the director was supposed to do. She probably played a big role in getting this awkward film production crew all the way to this point.

“What act do you want specifically? I haven’t received anything beforehand, so I haven’t prepared anything, but if there’s a style of acting you wish to see, I’ll try to comply as much as possible.”

Jiseon looked at Yoonseok. There seemed to be a problem.

“It wasn’t in the mail? About what kind of act we wanted?”

“There wasn’t. The email was pretty long, but all it had was the circumstances you were in. That’s why I’m here to see myself.”

Jiseon’s eyes became even sharper. Yoonseok laughed awkwardly and avoided Jiseon’s gaze.

“I’m sorry. We should've been clear about it in the email, but I guess we lacked preparation. We can’t ask you to show us anything now. We didn’t even specify what we wanted, so it’s rather ridiculous to have you do it right here, isn’t it?” Jiseon kept apologizing after that.

“While I might not be able to show you any complete acting, I can show you to a certain extent. I quite liked this script. Other actors definitely will too, so I feel I’ll only feel at ease if I could appeal to you about myself.”

“What we want is this scene from the script. Can you do it even though you just arrived and saw it for the first time?”

Jiseon pointed at a scene.

“I want to do it, as long as everyone’s okay with it.”

“You sound confident. Just as you said, we are all amateurs. No, we are even underqualified to be called that. However, we don’t plan to do this half-heartedly. We might be being overly greedy, but we want to do this properly. You know what I mean, right?”

“If I plan to do it half-heartedly, I might as well prepare myself fully and do it properly next time. Is that what you’re saying?”

“Yes, and I believe that it’s the right thing to do.”

One of the men, who had been listening until now, said, “I don’t think that it’s a bad idea to watch him now. He made time to come all the way here, and he says he wants to do it. Just as Jiseon said, it might be good to have him prepare and show us everything he has, but I think it’s okay to see what he can do now since he says he can do it. It’s not like either side has anything to lose. If how he acts doesn’t conform to what we want, then we can just ask him to change some things on the spot. What do other people think?”

“We don’t have to see a complete version. Moreover, we were the ones who made a mistake.”

Those were the opinions of two men.

Jiseon looked at Yoonseok, as though to indicate that the final decision was up to him.

“I want to see it. I wish to see how my character will act and move even for a moment.”

“Says our director.”

The students stood up and pushed the desks in the lecture room to the back. A small stage was created in front of the lecture podium.

Maru stood in the middle with the content outline in hand. The eyes of the students sitting in a semicircle were quite piercing. They seemed to be observing every little detail to see what kind of actor he would be and how suitable he would be for the film they were going to create.

“Which cut should I do?”

As soon as Maru spoke, opinions started being tossed around among the students.

We have to see the monologue, we have to see the conversation scene. We have to see the ending….

It was Yoonseok who made the decision this time as well.

“There’s a scene where he talks to a friend in the lecture room. I want to see that.”

“Is it scene 8?”

“Yes.”

“Okay, let me read the lines for a little.”

Maru inputted the illustrations, lines, and annotations that the director wrote into his head. As he had read the story, he knew what the character was. If he was given time to analyze in-depth, he might be able to bring out a clear personality, but he decided to just express the information that was given to him without going in depth.

He kept moving his lips and muttered the lines inside his mouth. When he felt like he had gotten used to saying them, he exerted some voice and uttered it out loud. He could see the students sitting in front of him flinch, but he didn’t mind. He focused entirely on the lines and the emotions.

“I need one person to receive my lines,” Maru said as he put down the content outline. He needed a partner because this was a conversation scene.

“Jiseon, you do it. It’s a girl’s role.”

“Me?”

Jiseon hesitated. Even with her personality, it seemed that acting was difficult for her.

“You just need to read the lines, so take it easy.”

“I’m worried I might interrupt you.”

“It’s okay. I’ll take care of my own emotions. That’s an actor’s job.”

“If you say so, then I won’t feel any pressure. I’ll just read it like reading a textbook, so don’t complain to me later.”

Maru handed the script to Jiseon. He already had the lines down anyway. He calmed his breathing and shook his hands and feet lightly.

The scene in question was inside a lecture room. He was in a lecture room right now, so it was a lot easier for him to get into the mood. He relaxed his body as much as possible so that he could produce the powerless voice that the director wanted.

He recalled the situation the main character was in and slowly closed his eyes before opening them again. He softened his lips and looked at Jiseon in front of him.

He was ready. He just needed to wait for her to start.

“Lee Jiseon, what are you doing?”

“Ah, okay. I’ll start now.”

Jiseon fixed her eyes on the script and spoke,

“Jungho, you’re really okay, right?”

Jungho. He embraced the ringing sensation given to him by that name.

Not Maru, but Jungho; not soldier 1, or thug 1 but Jungho.

It was a sense of exhilaration he hadn’t felt for a long time as an actor. Being called by the role he was assigned to was always an exciting moment.

Jungho, Jungho.

He cut that name into pieces and embedded them throughout his body.

“Me? I’m doing okay. There’s no reason for me to not be doing okay.”

He tasted an exhilarating sense of liberation like he was exhaling after holding his breath for a long time when he said his first line.

Jiseon, who was looking at the script, raised her head. They made eye contact. He could see her eyes tremble.

“Are you eating on time?”

“I am.”

“Really?”

“Yeah.”

The lines brushed past the tip of his tongue. Before his thoughts could come into play, his body created the words and pushed them out. While it was rather plain acting without any analysis, it felt pretty good.

He wished he could speed up a little; he wanted to urge Jiseon to speak faster. His heart was getting excited. He wanted to go to the next cut as soon as possible, before this lingering sensation from the lines disappeared.

“Jungho.”

“Why do you keep calling me?”

“You’re really okay, right?”

Okay, she said.

Maru, nay, Jungho was truly okay. He knew that he was not normal, so that meant he was okay. He approached his friend, who was worried about him. There was a need to give her conviction: I am abnormal, but not for the reason you should be worried about, so pretend that you didn’t see me. Don’t try to fix my cherished abnormality.

He reached out and pressed down on the script that Jiseon was holding. Her eyes, which were looking at the script, headed upwards. Her chin was raised, and he could see her neck.

He slowly rolled his eyes, looking past her neck, then nose, and to the eyes. His eyes glinted angrily as if it was a warning.

“I’m okay, so don’t mind me.”

* * *

Jiseon brushed her neck with her palm. She felt like the sense of chill creeping up her neck was calming down thanks to the warmth from her hand.

It was just a few lines. She just uttered the lines in the script without putting any emotions at all, yet from one moment onwards, she was enveloped in an extremely displeasing emotion.

It happened when she looked into his eyes. The man in front of her was acting, and she was fully aware that he was acting based on their request.

Despite that, it still felt iffy.

“Then I will see you next time.”

She met eyes with Maru again, as he said goodbye and shook hands with Yoonseok.

It had been about 10 minutes since the act ended, but her body still felt shriveled up. She put her hand on her neck again. It was itchy as though someone scratched it.

“He was good. It had really good vibes,” Yoonseok said. Jaejoon and Moonho agreed.

“Hey, Lee Jiseon. Why have you been spacing out for a while now?”

Jiseon took her hand off her neck and looked at Yoonseok.

“That person.”

“That person?”

“I mean the actor, Han Maru.”

“Yeah, what about him?”

“Maybe he really has a psychological disorder?”

“What’s gotten into you this time?”

“Not that. Didn’t you see that? His acting, I mean. Maybe he’s really mentally deranged like the main character? His eyes creeped me out. I thought he was going to attack me for real, not as an act.”

When she recalled those eyes, she felt chills down her back again. The atmosphere around him was totally different to the point that it made her wonder if he really was the same person as the guy who criticized every element in the film.

“If you felt that, then that’s awesome.”

“It’s not awesome. He’s strange.”

“Hey, quit it. You’re freaking me out. If you were planning to tease me, you were very successful so you can stop it now.”

Yoonseok laughed and tapped her on the shoulder.

Jiseon was angry now. He would never have said that if he didn’t watch from the side and looked at Maru’s eyes directly.

An aspiring actor, who hasn’t debuted yet and was around the same age as them, produced such a realistic-looking act?

“He might really be a strange person.”

It was no wonder she thought like that.

Jiseon looked at the script in her hand. She opened the part they acted out before. She could see the memos she and her friends wrote down in a messy fashion.

Protective desire, destructive impulse, and awareness of the abnormality.

“If he’s not a strange person… we might have joined hands with an absurdly good new actor.”

Jiseon shivered again, recalling the act from before. She tossed the script to Yoonseok and turned around.

It was mid-summer, but she wanted to drink something warm.

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