Chapter 61: Rule (3)
Arwin freely explored around the area where the camp was set up.
Everything in her field of vision was new to her.
Even though she had been to the outside world once before, her feelings about it were different now.
A quiet sense of wonder swept over her as she looked at landscapes she hadnt properly appreciated before.
The chains that had held her back all her life were now undone.
There would be no more entanglements with the World Tree.
She was finally face to face with the vast world she had so longed to see.
...Of course, there were still some limitations.
She had to continue her married life with Berg.
Sixty years... A period that was short if viewed as short, and long if viewed as long.
Only after this period would complete freedom come her way.
Unconsciously, Arwin found herself thinking about the back of Berg, who had fought for her.
It was hard to believe they had spent just a single day together.
Because this was the longest day in her 170-year of life.
The density of the time spent with him felt different, somehow.
She shook her head from side to side, casting off her thoughts.
Then she looked at the stream flowing before her.
She couldnt take her eyes off the water, the one constant in its flow.
Had she ever imagined a stream could look like this?
She became even more curious about the many wonders the world held.
Forgive me for asking so abruptly... but how do you feel about being in the outside world?
Someone behind her posed the question.
Turning around, she saw it was Ner approaching her.
Arwin responded with a voice that was uncharacteristically steady.
...Its good. Everything is new.
Ner offered a light smile.
You seem happier than before. That makes me glad.
Yes. Its the moment Ive been dreaming of.
Arwin took in all the scenery that approached her.
A brief silence followed.
Finally, Ner broke it.
...I heard from Berg.
What?
...That you havent been intimate. Thats a relief.
Arwin nodded.
Yes, thanks to you, Ner. Just as you said, a conversation made all the difference.
I told you, didnt I? Thats how Berg is.
Ner responded lightly, as if she knew everything about Berg.
Being in Ners presence cleared Arwins mind.
It happened at a time when she was having mixed feelings towards Berg.
When there was nothing else to gaze at, her eyes always followed him. And yet, making eye contact was a different story. Whenever their eyes met, she always found herself looking away.
She found herself checking on his wounds, recalling his vowseach thought adding another layer of complexity.
But she decided to put all of those thoughts aside in the presence of Ner.
Being with Ner gave her a clear understanding of the situation.
Of course, Ner didnt have romantic feelings for Berg either, but the relationship between her and Berg seemed more natural than Arwins.
The short-lived species must easily form bonds with other short-lived species.
Arwin had no intention of deepening her relationship with Berg.
If she ever saw a violent side to Berg that he might be hiding, she planned to use the poison if necessary and flee.
...
Of course, in this situation where she saw Berg in the morning... she didnt have any intention of using poison at all.
Putting all the thoughts aside, Arwin broached the subject of the near future.
Ah, Ner?
Yes?
Whats the sleeping arrangement going to be?
...
Are you going to continue sleeping with Berg?
...
Ner was silent for a moment, then asked as if resolving something within herself.
...Would you like to sleep beside him, Arwin-nim?
Arwin reacted reflexively.
Huh? ...No. Like I said, theres no point in getting close to a short-lived one.
...As you know, I dont love Berg either.
...You seemed quite close though. You even treated his wounds yourself.
Ah, friendship and love are two different things. Speaking of which, youve been staring at Berg all day...
...Well, he got injured because of me, so I cant help but keep an eye on him.
...
...
Both fell into a momentary silence.
Arwin was left with a nagging feeling for not being able to express her emotions transparently.
Ner also seemed displeased.
The atmosphere was entirely different from previous conversations of this sort.
Still, Arwin decided to accept the fact that she couldnt be more forthcoming with her feelings.
She herself didnt know why she felt this way.
It was an odd feeling that couldnt be expressed, even if she wanted to.
Perhaps now that she had seen who Berg really was, she found it hard to speak ill of him.
Even so, loving him was a separate issue, making the situation incredibly complicated.
Ner also spoke as she inhaled.
...This conversation is meaningless anyway. Berg will sort it out on his own.
Arwin nodded at that.
Then she teased lightheartedly,
...What an amusing situation. A commoner of the human race ends up having the decision to decide the order of sleeping.
Her words came out sounding more like a jest than she intended.
Ner didnt refute her.
Even if its the culture of the human race, polygamy has aspects that are difficult to understand. Ive accepted it for Arwin-nims sake, though.
...Thank you, Ner. That does help.
Just then, a voice rang out from afar.
Ner! Arwin!
Their eyes met at the sound of the voice.
...It seems Berg is looking for us.
Right. We should head back.
****
As per the request I had made to the members earlier, all our sleeping beds had been divided up today.
And as Arwin and Ner entered the makeshift tent, I spoke.
Lets sleep separately tonight.
Arwin let out a short sigh.
She seemed relieved, if only for a moment.
Had she been imagining the awkwardness of the three of us sleeping together?
Her aversion to sharing a bed still seemed to linger.
Looking at Ner, she was staring back at me.
Her expression suggested she wanted to say something.
...Is there something wrong?
...No, nothing.
With that, Ner quickly claimed a bed in the corner for herself.
Scratching my body, I watched her.
The wounds were gradually getting itchy as scabs formed.
...Berg, your hand.
Ner pointed out my behavior.
I lifted my hand to show her and left my wounds alone.
After getting scolded by Adam Hyung, now it was Ners turn.
Once Arwin had chosen her bed, I sat down in the remaining spot.
I couldnt tell if it was intentional, but the largest space was given to me.
Thinking about it for a moment, I found it amusing.
Noble ladies occupying the most uncomfortable spots for a commoner like me.
Being so close to them, it was easy to forget, but the gap in our social status was quite significant.
I explained our future plans to them.
We should reach the village in about two days. After that, well hold the funeral and a feast, and then we can take some time to rest.
...
...
Ner and Arwin silently stared at me. I continued.
Im sure you both have thought about it too, but it seems like we need to set some rules for ourselves. Like we share a bedroom or use turns, for example.
I was about to scratch my arm again, but put my hand down at Ners gaze.
...Ive been thinking, we could alternate on a daily basis. One day Ner, one-day Arwin... like that. It would be easier for both of you, wouldnt it?
The intention was to create a sense of fairness.
Neither Ner nor Arwin were particularly enthusiastic about sharing a bed with me yet.
In a situation where both were uncomfortable, it wouldnt be fair to burden just one of them.
I could only hope that these feelings would change over time.
As expected, both Ner and Arwin nodded at my suggestion.
On a strange impulse, I asked a question.
Or would either of you like to continue sharing a bed with me?
...
...
However, Ner and Arwin simply exchanged cautious glances at my words.
A prolonged silence hung in the air inside the tent.
While waiting for an answer, I changed the subject.
...Lets go eat.
It was half-hearted even on my part.
If I favored one over the other, the remaining one would feel left out.
I couldnt even understand why Id asked the question.
I wasnt particularly surprised by their reactions, as they were already as expected.
Ner had said it would take a long time for her to fall in love, and Arwin had no intention of loving me.
For that to change, time was needed.
****
Or would either of you like to continue sharing a bed with me?
Ner had to suppress the urge to answer Bergs question.
...
In truth, sharing a bed with Berg recently hadnt been all that uncomfortable.
Throughout her long life, Berg had been the first person Ner had ever slept beside.
Her siblings had always huddled together to sleep until they each found their soul bonds.
Ner had always been alone.
That changed when she began sharing a bed with Berg.
At first, she was filled with aversion to the idea, but gradually, her discomfort waned.
It somehow felt reassuring to open her eyes from a deep sleep to find Berg there, and the warmth they occasionally shared was comforting.
It was as if she instinctively craved those shared moments with someone.
She felt this more acutely than ever on the day Berg married Arwin.
The bed she had to herself for the first time in a long while felt strangely expansive and uncomfortable.
Had sharing a bed with Berg become so familiar to her? She found herself staying awake for long hours.
The mild disappointment she felt at seeing the divided beds in this makeshift tent was part of that sentiment.
He had shared the bed with Arwin the night before, so she secretly hoped it would be her turn tonight.
In that sense, she actually wanted to answer Bergs question.
That it would be alright if they continued to sleep together.
But the words never left her lips.
She kept thinking about the distant future.
She was afraid of the emotions that might develop if they continued to be so close.
There was also the anxiety of what would happen if Berg, who poured out so much affection, wouldnt let go of her.
At that time, there might come a situation where shed have to betray him by leaking information about Stockpin, the headquarters of the Red Flames.
Ner wanted to be prepared for that beforehand.
For her own future, it would be more convenient if Berg loved Arwin more.
It was an uncomfortable realization, but only then would Berg let her go when Blackwood provided a suitable compensation.
Reason and emotion continued to wrestle within her.
Reason said to remain silent since it was better for Berg to love Arwin.
Emotion urged her to respond, as she wanted to sleep beside Berg.
It was a conflict that had been recurring more and more lately.
...Lets go eat, he finally said.
Berg didnt wait that long.
Casually changing the subject, he stood up from his seat.
With a tinge of regret, Ner quietly sighed.
Once they returned to Stockpin, she would have the chance to sleep beside him again.
...
That time, she wanted to sneak deeper into his arms and try to sleep.
Perhaps she could hear him compliment her tail as being pretty once more.
These thoughts slightly alleviated her pent-up emotions.
Whatever the case, they had time.
Their marriage was real.
The ring on her finger attested to that fact.
The End of The Chapter
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