Chapter 101: No Favoritism (7)
...Shes already waiting for someone else.
I struggled to understand Arwins words.
...What do you mean by that?
Arwins cold fingers traced the bite mark on my neck left by Ner.
With a look of compassion, she observed the wound and added an explanation.
Ners grandmother... she was a famous fortune teller.
I already knew that Ner cherished her grandmother deeply. Even the day after our wedding, she was commemorating her.
She was the only person in the Blackwood estate who was on her side. I even laid flowers at her grave.
And when Ner was young, she received a prophecy from her grandmother. It said... her destined partner would eventually find her.
...
At those words, a wave of emotion surged through me.
I looked at Arwin.
...Considering the circumstances, thats not you.
She continued.
You know that Ners race can love only one person, right?
...Are you saying Ner already loves someone else?
Arwin shook her head.
No. How can she love someone she hasnt even met? She said that herself. But...
...
...But shes not planning to give her heart to anyone else. And even for Berg...
...
Strangely, I felt my strength draining away.
I thought our relationship had been improving lately.
Arwin whispered.
No matter how good you are to her... even trying to get along with her as her husband... Ner will remain the same. Nothing more than a friend, nothing less.
...
So, Berg. Stop hurting yourself unnecessarily. Its painful to watch you get hurt like this.
...
...You know Im not lying. Youve seen it yourself, havent you?
What if I cant love you till the end?
That was what Ner asked me on our first night together.
Was this thought underlying everything?
As Arwin said, it was not like there werent signs in Ners behavior.
At the time, I thought it was just her aversion to me.
But at the mention of another reason, I found myself wavering.
The werewolf race is capable of loving only one person...
Perhaps I had taken those words too lightly.
...
Moreover, I was unsettled for another reason.
...Perhaps I felt a kinship without even realizing it.
Hadnt I, too, harbored feelings for someone?
I let out a short sigh.
My feelings were sinking deeper than I had thought.
This made me realize just how much affection I had poured into Ner.
...Its okay.
I quickly shook my head.
...What?
Arwin expressed her confusion.
I said,
...Being united with the one you love is like a fairy-tale miracle.
...
We are already married, we are a couple. Even if its not ideal, I have no intention of giving up on our future because of that.
...But to hurt so much-
-It doesnt matter if I get hurt. Who else will protect my wives if not me?
It was okay if it seemed forced.
It seemed I couldnt help it in times like these.
I couldnt give up, even out of greed.
...I have to at least try.
What...
Looking at Arwin, I said,
...She might end up liking me.
...
Arwin looked at me and spoke cautiously.
...If you take Ners race too lightly-
-Stop.
...
Its up to me.
Arwin frowned.
Then, leaning back against me, she spoke with dissatisfaction.
...I said that for your sake.
I chuckled at her blunt words.
Instead of worrying about that, try liking me a bit.
I threw a light, teasing joke with a bit of truth in it.
............
Arwins body stiffened at those words.
The warmth from her damp body transferred to me.
Her ears fluttered slightly.
...I do.
What?
...I like you.
I was briefly surprised by Arwins confession.
She added,
...As a friend. Would I be here like this if I hated you?
I chuckled again.
Well, that figures.
...You were the one who wanted to start as friends.
I meant, like me as a husband...
...You want me to miss you for 1000 years?
...
I scratched my neck. The atmosphere suddenly turned awkward, leaving me at a loss.
And a slightly awkward space between us was created.
Then Arwin pulled my arm to wrap it around her.
It looked like I was lightly hugging her.
It seemed like she was doing this partly out of guilt for the cold words she had just uttered.
...Im cold.
She made an excuse.
...Take off your wet clothes.
...
Arwin blushed at my words.
I smiled lightly at her reaction.
Just like that, time passed again.
Although I joked after learning about Ners situation, it wasnt true that I had no thoughts about it.
I still wasnt sure what kind of feelings I should have for Ner.
Should I be grateful for her acting on my behalf, despite the burden it carries?
Or should I be sad, thinking she has no intention of giving her heart to me?
...Should I avoid pushing her too hard in the future?
It was difficult.
In the end, I let out a sigh.
No matter how long I pondered these thoughts, no answer seemed to come.
It was better to think that everything would work out in the future.
I decided to put all my thoughts aside.
With that, I rested my chin on Arwins head.
.
.
.
.
The next day, early in the dawn, we began preparing to leave for Stockpin.
Arwin, rubbing her sleepy eyes, followed me.
The rain had stopped.
The water droplets from the wet leaves still lingered.
Breathing in the fresh morning forest air, we made our way to the horses.
...Berg, theres something I want to tell you.
Arwin stopped following me to speak.
Go ahead.
...I dont know if youre aware, but... when elf couples want to show they are happy together, they hold hands.
I thought such a thing wasnt limited by race... but considering she was mentioning it like this, there must be some deeper meaning.
...So, maybe it would be comfortable to walk holding hands from now on.
I nodded.
...In Ners place.
...
For your sake and Ners too.
She added.
I didnt say anything in response.
****
Since the previous night, Ners heart had been acting as if it were broken.
It fluttered with excitement whenever she acknowledged her deep feelings for Berg.
But thinking of Berg and Arwin, who hadnt returned, her heart sank heavily.
She rode toward Stockpin in silence, not uttering a word.
With a stern expression, she just held the reins and spurred the horse.
There was a desire to ride faster, even if just a little.
What should she say when she meets Berg?
Should she tell him she was worried?
Should she act as if nothing happened and make light conversation?
Should she show that she was angry?
...
She couldnt decide.
It seemed she would only know once they met.
She was eager to find out how Arwin and Berg had spent their time.
From a distance, Stockpin came into view.
Seeing Adam and his group approaching, several members came out to meet them.
Captain!
It was Baran and Theodore.
Adam slowed down and asked,
Wheres Berg?
He just arrived with Arwin-nim.
Ners heart sank again.
Now that the moment had arrived, she felt it.
She was likely going to be angry.
As soon as she realized he was safe, the emotions hiding behind her worry surged forth.
...
And with that, she realized.
Would she have been this angry if she had no feelings for Berg?
Would she have worried this much?
...No.
That wasnt it.
She certainly cultivated feelings for Berg, and she realize this yet again.
Whoa! Ner-nim!
In a moment, Ner broke away from the procession and spurred her horse.
She hurried towards the village where Berg was.
Haah... Haah...
Arriving alone in the village, Ner first sought out Berg.
Her heart fluttered nervously.
The mere fact that the man she might love was with another woman soured her mood.
Berg!
She soon found him.
Oddly enough, her anger melted away the moment she saw him.
It felt like a long time, even though it was just a day.
She just wanted to tell him that she worried a lot.
She wanted to lie down and rest with him.
To spend time together.
............
But her focus blurred as the scene unfolded.
Arwin was standing next to him.
Their fingers intertwined.
They seemed close.
...I was... worried.
Ner whispered to herself.
..Did they have a good time?
Even then, Ner exaggerated her feelings.
Not so much exaggerated, as she didnt hide them.
Usually, she restrained her emotions, but now, she wanted Berg to know she was angry.
Ner slowly dismounted the horse and approached Berg.
She looked up at him, slightly furrowing her brow.
...
She stared at him in silence.
It was as if she was challenging him to make an excuse, if he had any.
Why hadnt he kept his promise of returning last night?
She wanted to hear him say he was sorry for leaving his wife alone.
Berg smiled faintly and raised his hand.
It was clear he was going to stroke her with his familiar touch.
Even as she was angry, Ner had no intention of rejecting his caress.
She hoped he would only caress her.
And as these contradictory thoughts deepened, she became more aware of her feelings.
...Maybe she really did love him.
...
...?
But Bergs hand momentarily stiffened in mid-air.
Ner felt her hardened expression involuntarily softening at his awkward gesture.
Why wasnt he caressing her?
-...Tap.
...Lets go inside.
The awkward gesture ended with a brief tap on her head.
Then he turned away.
He didnt offer any sort of excuse.
...Huh?
While Ner was perplexed, she met Arwins eyes.
Arwin looked at her, then flashed a polite, light smile.
Soon, she walked away, still holding hands with Berg.
...
Ner stood there, frozen, watching the backs of the two.
It was a subtle change in Berg, but... it was enough to plunge her into confusion.
The End of The Chapter
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