Chapter 34 – Comfort
[Translator – Peptobismol]
Chapter 34 – Comfort
“Are you serious right now?”
“Yes, whether you believe me or not.”
Isabel’s eyes sparkled with transparency.
To spout such nonsense without a care.
I burst out laughing in disbelief.
“I’m not asking for forgiveness right away. It’s obviously going to be difficult. So, whenever your anger builds up, take it out on me like now. You can do whatever you want to me. I will be by your side whenever you want.”
“You’re completely insane.”
“But I want my sincerity to reach you, even if it has to be this way.”
The repetitive conversation sent my blood pressure skyrocketing.
“I’m not interested in your sincerity, and I don’t want to know.”
“But Kyle, you’re the only one who can punish me.”
“Shut up.”
“Please. Just once. Give me the chance to atone for you.”
Apologize, apologize, damn apologies.
After despising Kyle as she pleased, she was now forcing me to forgive her with pitiful eyes, as if she were the victim herself.
Ah, now I understand.
The reason she’s clinging to me, begging for punishment.
Even if she’s hated, she wants to be deeply entwined with Kyle.
To heal from her own trauma, having been condemned by the man she killed with her own hands.
And to escape the swamp of irreparable regret.
Utterly selfish.
Even when she despised Kyle all her life, even when she belatedly regretted her mistakes, the only important thing to her is her own emotions.
Even now.
Because she resents her own situation.
Because she can’t control her own emotions.
Because she’s tormented by the mistakes of her past.
Surprisingly, Isabel hasn’t changed.
“You’re still the same.”
“Kyle…”
“Keep your mouth shut. What? You want me to slap you, spit on you? Do you hope that my anger would be relieved by doing that?”
I laughed out of sheer incredulity.
My boiling rage made my teeth chatter.
“Why me?”
“…”
“Did you think I’d thank you for that?”
I bent down to meet Isabel, who was kneeling, at eye level.
My face, reflected in her eyes, was distorted.
“If you want to discard your memories and emotions, look for a trash can. Don’t bother me with your nonsense.”
At the same time, the corners of Isabel’s lips twisted.
It was a somewhat twisted smile.
“But, I still want to be forgiven like this.”
“What? Forgiveness?”
Isabel nodded her head with unfocused eyes.
I wondered if she really believed it, but it seemed she did.
I stared at Isabel in front of me, who believed without a doubt that the man in front of her was Kyle Winfred.
My teeth chattered.
But I’m not Kyle.
From the way I walk, to the way I speak, to even the little habits, not a single thing matched.
If she had even the slightest interest in Kyle.
If she had observed Kyle’s behavior even a little.
She would have known that Kyle’s soul had been swapped…
She would’ve known without a doubt.
Suddenly, that thought crossed my mind.
Ah, it’s all pointless.
The owner of this body, whom Isabel desperately seeks, is already dead.
Unable to withstand the world’s malice, unable to endure the beating named hatred.
“…”
My boiling rationality was abruptly—interrupted.
Though it’s not an issue I should be angry about, the boiling anger from the quagmire still made my ears burn hot.
I couldn’t bear it anymore.
Why did I have fall into this unfamiliar world and suffer such a calamity?
Why do I have to be the target of someone’s vile desires?
“Forgiveness… forgiveness…”
The small remnants of conscience in my heart shattered into pieces.
My eyes widened.
“So you want my forgiveness that badly?” “Yes, you are the only one I have, Kyle.”
“Is that so?”
Whether I have the right to talk about forgiving or not, it doesn’t matter.
Even if they curse me for being selfish.
I must find a way to escape this damned world no matter what.
“Scared Solvent.”
“Scared… Solvent…?”
“Yeah, bring me that. You know? See if it changes my heart.”
Scared Solvent.
Scared… Solvent…
Isabel muttered continuously in a gloomy voice.
She looked at me with a bizarre face, neither smiling nor crying.
“I’ll bring it.”
Isabel smiled brightly.
A solid sense of satisfaction emerged on her face.
“I can do it.”
Brushing off the dust on her knees, Isabel stood up.
Her eyes flickered.
“Because… I love you.”
It was a bold lie.
Such vile emotions can never be love.
At that moment, something familiar appeared in the air.
[ Scenario Progress: 45% ]
Ah, right.
That exists.
It’s fine.
No, it’s even better.
If, by any chance, a situation arises where the completion reaches 100%.
So, if the system eventually intervenes in my fate under the pretext of balancing…
— Just choose random actions until the moment the system intervenes in your fate, then cleanly die.
— If you die during the causality adjustment, the possibility of system intervention completely disappears.
Because if I die, everything will be over.
****
[Translator – Peptobismol]
I immediately returned to the mansion.
That evening, I lay down with a high fever.
Was it because of the dreadful encounter with Isabel?
Or was it because the aftermath of the Mana outburst hadn’t completely subsided?
It was terribly painful.
To the point where I thought it would be better to pass out.
Everything was just annoying.
I felt unfairly treated to the point of despair.
All the situations I’m in now.
— Oh, it’s boiling! Boiling!
— Seung-jun, get up and eat some porridge.
— Inseok. You won’t get better if you don’t eat.
My parents’ affectionate voices brushed against my ears.
I missed the warm affection directed towards me.
I turned my head.
Looking at the empty space next to me made my heart ache strangely.
Lee Seung-jun.
Yes, that was the name.
My real name, not Kyle Winfred.
Sweat trickled incessantly, stinging my eyes.
I couldn’t tell if it was tears or sweat.
My head was spinning, and breathing was difficult.
My whole body felt as if it were burning with a fever.
I needed someone I could trust and rely on.
I was yearning for quiet attention, not for the twisted emotions pouring out towards me.
Ah, I’m tired.
The midnight silence felt eternal.
At that moment, Creak— the door opened.
Who could it be at this hour?
Unable to muster the strength to toss and turn, I turned my head slightly to see Diana entering.
Diana placed the tray she carried on the bedside table.
A moment later, a savory aroma tickled my nostrils.
“I apologize for disturbing you at this late hour. I brought some soup.”
“…Soup?”
“Yes, you haven’t eaten all day.”
Is that so?
Come to think of it, that seemed to be the case.
Diana supported me firmly as I struggled to sit up.
“I’ll help you get up.”
Diana firmly supported my limp body.
I managed to sit up and rest my head on the headboard.
Even just getting up made my breathing rough.
I blinked dazedly, and a spoon was pushed into my view.
“Please open your mouth.”
What? She wants me to open my mouth?
Could it be she’s trying to feed me or something?
Feeling bewildered, I cautiously opened my mouth as Diana gently urged me to, and the warm soup flowed down my throat, warming my insides.
The taste of the soup was…
“…It tastes awful.”
Bitter, yet salty at the same time.
It seemed like Diana had cooked the soup herself.
“Your taste buds are likely numb due to the fever.”
Diana stated firmly, as if denying any possibility.
Her demeanor amused me, and I chuckled.
After that, Diana continued to feed me the soup slowly.
It didn’t taste good, but it was still warm.
Although it was only soup, it helped alleviate the excruciating pain a little.
Before I knew it, the bowlful of soup was finished, and I felt a familiar sense of fullness.
After a while, Diana took out a towel and dipped it into the water pitcher she brought.
“Please stay still.”
The cold sensation spread across my face as her gentle touch moved across it.
Each stroke of her hand sent a tingling sensation through a corner of my chest.
I suddenly became curious.
What thoughts were running through Diana’s mind as she looked at me?
Contempt? Hatred? Indifference?
If not, perhaps pity?
I turned my head slightly to look at Diana.
Her eyes were incredibly serene.
All I could see in her eyes was the determination to wipe my face clean.
After a while, she brought something to my lips again.
“Please take this medicine.”
“…Where did you get that from?”
“I brought it.”
Only then did I realize it.
Ah, she’s worried about me.
That’s why she came to my room at this late hour.
To take care of me while I’m sick.
A breeze swept through a corner of my heart.
This strange feeling, which I’ve never experienced since arriving in this world, furrowed my brows.
Diana’s silver hair shimmered under the moonlight.
The stifling feeling in my chest dissipated as if a hole had been punctured in it.
“…Why does the medicine taste like this?”
“Your taste buds are likely numb due to the fever.”
“But if they’re numb, wouldn’t I not be able to taste it?”
“Not necessarily.”
That unwavering attitude oddly provided some comfort.
A laugh escaped my lips, breaking through the tension.
I slowly pulled myself back under the covers.
The pain persisted, but somehow, I could endure it now.
“…”
“…”
I didn’t hear the sound of the door opening.
Diana was still sitting beside the bed, watching over me.
I maintained silence.
Though selfish, I wished Diana would stay by my side tonight.
A cozy silence enveloped me.
That night, for the first time, I didn’t have a nightmare.
[TL/N: Diana best girl so far… but why does it feel like she’ll be the craziest of them all;;]
[Translator – Peptobismol]
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