I Became The Pope, Now What?

"The Archpriest is… he's a man of the people, Gab. He scammed the money out of the Count's pockets and helped people set up businesses. All this loan is, in reality, some of the misplaced money from the direct donations the Count makes to the monastery. But since, by law, the monastery must reveal the spending of this money, they had to find loopholes.

"They did so by showing the missing money as miscellaneous expenses that added up in time to more than three million gold graces. This man is a genius at embezzling money, and he's doing it for good. But… it seems he's in trouble with the Count's Prima, who has likely found out the folly."

Gabriel sipped in some cold breeze. Three million was an absolutely crazy number. "I don't know if he's a genius or mad. But, even if he's caught, I don't think he should worry. Because in the end, he did make the Count rich by making the people rich. More business means more tax."

Sylvester agreed. "That's what confuses me. The Archbishop has already done plenty of things, and he should have gone to the Count to show what a great job he has done and that they should implement the scheme more. So this could only mean that the Count's Prima has some other dirt on the Archbishop. Maybe a woman or something, that's the most common thing around."

They couldn't really find out the reason just by sitting there. So the best way was to search for it the next day. But Sylvester had also felt he needed to put this matter to the side and instead only focus on the killer. So he decided to go to the castle again and look for this knight from the capital that Sir Milton talked about.

Why was a man from the capital there? What did he want? He needed to know everything. Even a clue as thin as a straw was appreciated as there was no other way to solve this mystery.

…

In Raftel County,

Felix had to deal with a different thing altogether. It turned out that the Count and his wife were overly kind and friendly to him. They held a good feast for him and happily participated in all investigations.

Even the Count's wife was as humble as the famous Lady Marcella. But Felix reckoned the man probably looked for the second-best woman after the one he loved was taken from him.

"Lady Melinda, may I ask if you ever had met Lady Marcella?" Felix asked the blonde woman as it was her turn for interrogation. She was a pretty, middle-aged graceful woman of good stature. Definitely, some men would go crazy over her. And it appeared she knew it, apparent by her choice of dress.

It was an intricately made red gown with golden embroidery. It was an off-shoulder gown, meaning the entirety of her neck and shoulders were clear to see… and also a good part of her upper bust.

Felix was a hard man in mind and could easily ignore the hardness in his pants. Even her sweet, melodious voice did not affect him.

"Of course, she was like a sister to me. Although our husbands didn't get along, we got along just fine. We'd even meet up every once in a while over our little wine dates. I'm going on a wine date with noble wives of minor lords after this too.

"I must say, Lady Marcella was like an elder to me who guided me in marriage. I know she'd had experience with my husband before me, so she told me many things on how to handle him."

Felix didn't ask her to elaborate as he felt she would say something inappropriate. By now, he knew she was only noble in looks, while in mind, she was a degenerate—or something close like that.

"Did you hold any hostilities with her because of her past relationships with your husband?" he asked.

She chuckled and put one finger under her chin while staring at Felix. "Dear, I've been with many men before I met my husband. I don't see him getting riled up about it. Besides, Lady Marcella is too stuck up in honour. She wouldn't even take it in her mouth, I heard. She says it's against the faith. Bullocks, I say… mouth is where the real fun begins. If we don't satisfy our husbands, they will eventually sniff around other women's panties. But again, seeing Count Jartel's pig-like body, I don't think I would take it in my mouth either."

"..."

Felix moved on to the next question. "Thank you for your cooperation, Lady Melinda. For the last question, do you have anyone in mind who would want to harm her? Or maybe wish to harm her as retaliation against Count Jartel?"

She shrugged gracefully. "I wouldn't know about Count's enemies. But, at least for my husband, I can confidently say that he'd rather slit his own wrist than harm Lady Marcella. You see, my husband is still stuck up on her—one of the reasons why we still don't have any kids."

"So you're not involved with him?" Felix instinctively asked.

She chuckled seductively. "Naughty boy, asking such questions. Well, I was very much involved… he just didn't go all the way with me. Sadly… he sometimes calls me Marcella in the middle of it… I wonder what I'm doing wrong."

There was genuine sadness on her face this time. And Felix could somewhat imagine how it could affect her mentally. He reckoned this was one of the reasons why she became so flirtatious over time… unless she was always like this.

Felix took out a little piece of strange root from his bag that Sylvester had given him to fight cold if he's ever stuck somewhere. He had learnt that this peculiar root could also cause an intense erection.

"Take this and somehow get your husband to eat it. Archpriest Sylvester, the Lord's Bard, discovered it. Maybe this can help you… as it causes some very much increased… ugh… thirst."

She laughingly got up from her chair and took the root. Then as she headed to the door, she winked at him. "Thank you, Priest Felix. You're nothing like your dumb father… I'm amazed."

Felix chortled at that remark. "Yeah, most people say that. When did you meet him?"

"Count Sandwall came here for trade-related talks. He's an abysmally boring man, I must say. Maybe you should teach him something… and I can teach you some things?"

"Like what?" Felix asked instinctively as she was too close to him, and the perfume she used was too strong.

Lady Malinda got closer to him and caressed his cheek with her index finger. "How to… please… a woman… with…"

She didn't finish and left after pecking on his cheek. She was definitely the most teasing woman Felix had ever met in his life. Even a minute after she was gone, he was standing in the same place like a statue.

Then, when his mind came to senses, he cursed. "Damn! She's fine!"

"..."

There was sir Dolorem in one corner of the room, writing down the exchange. "I suppose there will be no need for another interrogation of her?"

"Yes! No more meetings with her. The woman is too horny!"

"Just like someone else." Sir Dolorem took a jibe at him.

Annoyed, Felix pointed at the man in return. "Oh really? Says the man whose own groin mountain has reached the peak!"

"..."

"May the holy light enlighten us!"

Sir Dolorem chanted the Lord's name to allow his tool to calm down. Women can be perilous without even a weapon; he had learnt a grave lesson today.

Felix agreed. "May the holy light enlighten us indeed."

…

The crusaders were moving out, and Sylvester, along with the rest of the town folks, were as happy as they could be. They were annoyed by the knights and wizards because they followed no laws and made a mess everywhere they went. In the taverns, they harassed the women, and in the streets, they catcalled women from young to old.

Seeing this, the most annoyed person was, of course, Lady Aurora. She was missing for the time, but when she was needed, she'd appear. As she was from Inquisitor's camps, she knew that her father's reputation was hinged upon this crusade. So seeing the crusaders acting in such a way angered her.

"I will see which one of you dares utter a single word of filth!" She boomed at the crusaders after gathering them up in the fields outside the monastery.

In shame, they all held their heads low, knowing she could easily kill them and nothing would happen to her.

After that, all the crusaders behaved like scared kids, taking every step carefully. Perhaps that annoyed them, and they decided to leave before their departure time. So the first thing in the morning the next day, they packed their luggage and headed north, towards the Duchy of Iceling, where the supposed Bloodling resided.

"My prince! See you later!" Sylvester waved at the dumb prince who happily sat in his luxury carriage.

Lady Aurora looked at Sylvester with suspicion. "What are you cooking now?"

He smirkingly replied. "Sometimes, it's better to act ignorant and let the fools be fools. The end fruit is sweeter this way. By the way, where were you? I needed your help with a monastery-related issue."

She scoffed while standing with folded arms. "My work is none of your businesses, Archpriest. Stay within your limits."

"Ah… no cookies then. Anyway, I was-"

"Lord Bard! Lady Aurora!" Archbishop came running. "Great misfortune has befallen! Oh Lord Solis… these lands will be ravaged now!"

Sylvester helped the man stand straight amidst his heavy, scarred pants. "What happened?"

"This! It came from Raftel!"

Sylvester read the letter addressed to the Archbishop. And the moment he read the first few lines, he felt like tearing the paper apart.

"Jartel, that hateful man I can't ever call brother again. I loved Marcella… he took her from me… and when I finally found love again, he took Melinda too! I demand my wife be returned, or I shall launch a full-scale invasion into Jartel at sunrise tomorrow! Empty the monastery—be warned!"

"What happened?" Sylvester questioned the Archbishop as he heard about Lady Melinda just the night before in morse code. And it seemed everything was fine.

The Archbishop cried in worry for the people. "She's missing! This is like Lady Marcella all over again! This land is doomed."

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