As I opened the door, what greeted me was a space that looked like a pigsty.
What is this? Did I mistake the room?
Thud.
I closed the door once and glanced around. This should be the right place…
I carefully opened the door again, but the scene remained the same as before, confirming it wasn’t a hallucination.
The room was dimly lit with thick curtains, even in the middle of the day. All sorts of junk were scattered on the floor, and a strangely pungent smell wafted through the air.
And in the middle of it all, there was a weirdo with seaweed-like hair, grinning and fondling a flesh-colored object with an obscene design.
“Hehehe… With this, I can… heheh.”
…I closed the door again.“Yep. This must not be the right place.”
Ignoring the curious glances from my companions, I tried to slip away as if nothing had happened… but I was a step too late.
Bang!
Faye, having noticed my presence, swiftly opened the door and came running.
“Junior! Perfect timing!”
“Eek! Put that thing away! Quickly!”
“Huh? Oh, this?”
I hid behind Iris to avoid the flesh-colored object that, to anyone’s eyes, looked exactly like my lower part, albeit strangely elongated like a tentacle.
However, since Iris’s frame was quite small, it didn’t help much.
My companions were staring dumbfounded at the grotesque object dragging on the floor. Faye, ignoring them, pushed the horror right in front of me.
From Faye’s earlier muttering, I could guess the tentacle’s intended use.
Both Faye and I spoke at the same time.
“I absolutely won’t allow it from behind!”
“Do you prefer having an extra one to use, like a tentacle, or just having it near the current spot?”
“……”
“……”
Both of us were dumbfounded by the unexpected words.
I regained my composure, noticing Carla chuckling as she turned her head away.
“Weren’t you planning to attach that thing to me?”
“Why would I waste this precious thing on you? I just thought that since we’ve been doing it with multiple people lately, you might need more.”
An outrageous idea that would make even a corrupted alchemist humble. But for now, I was just relieved that the tentacle wasn’t intended for me.
“Phew… I was really shocked.”
“What? Did you think I would enjoy attaching this to you? I don’t have such tastes…”
“But Faye, think about what you did when you first called me and what you’ve been making until now.”
“Let’s see… A love potion for you, sensory-linked slime, tanning cream, dual dick– Ah!”
Faye seemed to realize something as she spoke, looking startled.
“You like it when I do suspicious things to you!”
“No! It’s you who enjoys doing weird things to me!”
Unbelievable. Instead of making the Philosopher’s Stone, she’s been making perverted things.
…Though I can’t deny that her skills have been improving.
As I sighed deeply, Faye awkwardly wiggled the tentacle.
“Ahem. Anyway, which one do you prefer?”
“I don’t want either. Just stick to making the dildos and onaholes you were making.”
“Boring…”
“Have you ever considered that maybe you’re the crazy one, Faye?”
At least, that’s what I think.
While pressing my temples to ease the growing headache, Faye nonchalantly mumbled while putting the tentacle away.
“I guess I’ll just adjust this a bit and use it in the next staff.”
“…Wait, what? You’re going to make a staff out of that?”
“Yep. This came from researching sensory-linked slime. If it can receive sensory information, maybe it can also send movement signals. I thought it could be used to make a staff that maintains its strength while increasing mana amplification.”
As usual, Faye rattled off her knowledge. This time, however, I roughly understood her point.
The essence was that an artificially paired weapon could be created.
People say that if you use the same weapon for a long time, you get used to it. Taking it further, it feels like an extension of your body, allowing you to perform beyond your usual skill level.
Pairing is the term for this phenomenon. In H&A, it was implemented as a system where equipment gained additional stats when its proficiency maxed out.
According to the lore, it was because the magic pattern had been completely imprinted over a long period of time.
Because it could maximize the potential of equipment, people used to grind for proficiency even in the later stages of the game.
But she’s skipping that tedious process entirely?
“Faye, are you secretly a genius?”
“Ehem. Then give me more research funds!”
“I’ll see to it. Let’s discuss the details later… For now, let’s go inside. It’s not appropriate to walk around the halls with this. I also have something to show you.”
“It’s just cute…”
Grumbling, Faye neatly coiled the tentacle and tucked it into her cleavage. It was so long that the end still peeked out.
As I watched that spectacle and turned away, I met Iris’s eyes, who was still clinging to my shoulder as a shield (ineffective).
With her hands on her hips and her cheeks puffed out, she looked like a child imitating an adult scolding someone.
“Master.”
“Hmm?”
“Did you say never from behind?”
“That’s right.”
“Yet you coveted my rear so eagerly?”
“……”
Still, there’s a huge difference between being the one doing it and being the one receiving it.
I gently stroked Iris’s twitching ear until she melted down before I could finally enter the room.
After drawing back the unnecessarily thick curtains and gathering all the items on the floor into one place, I laid a waterproof tarp on the floor and took out the prepared corpses from my inventory.
“Here we go.”
First up was a standard chimera, a mass-produced type found at the rear.
It had a bizarre appearance, as if various monsters had been stitched together haphazardly and covered with a carapace.
Faye examined the chimera here and there, nodding as she did.
“Well-made. But it seems like they didn’t consider stability.”
“Stability?”
“Yeah. Just from a quick look, this thing had tremendous regenerative abilities, right?”
“That’s correct. Its defense was mediocre, but it regenerated quickly.”
“That’s the thing. Chimeras naturally have rejection reactions, causing them to rot from the inside, so adding regenerative abilities just accelerates the process.”
“…So it minimizes the damage from the rejection reaction?”
“Tuuut. Wrong. Life isn’t that simple, Junior! The correct answer is… it consumes resources quickly and breaks down fast!”
“……”
What is this sense of misfortune? An overly excited Faye can be quite surprising.
“Well, it seems they did utilize the materials’ strengths well. The body of a great grizzly, the head of an orc, the tail of an evil boa. The tissues are arranged in a way that they don’t interfere with each other… But it’s a bit disappointing.”
“Disappointing? How so?”
“Well, thanks for bringing it, but it’s a bit crude, probably because it was made with technology from 300 years ago. I feel like I could make something like this if I had the materials.”
“Aha, if that’s the case, don’t worry.”
I put the chimera back into my inventory and took out an elite specimen found near the fortress.
“There’s a stronger chimera.”
“Wow…”
With her mouth agape, Faye eagerly dug into the elite chimera’s corpse.
“This is… this is truly amazing. They forcefully attached incompatible parts, but it worked out positively? Did they use the power of an Evil God… to achieve this…”
“I didn’t say that was the end.”
“…Huh?”
I grinned at the puzzled Faye and put the corpse back.
Then I showed her the bodies of the five unit captains, and finally, I took out the body of the Tarasque, the pinnacle of the chimera units.
Faye froze, her mouth hanging open as if time had stopped. I slipped a finger into her mouth.
Squish.
“Ah!”
When I pulled her tongue, she snapped out of it, closing her mouth around my finger and mumbling.
“Mmmp. Mmmph, mmmp. Mmmph!”
“What?”
When I pulled my finger out, a strand of transparent saliva stretched out. I wiped it off on Faye’s sleeve.
Faye didn’t seem to care, standing on tiptoe and staring at me intently.
Her eyes were spinning faster than usual, showing her excitement.
Then she started hopping and pounced on me.
“You’re the best! I love you, Junior!”
Boing, boing.
I nodded in satisfaction as I watched Faye’s chest jiggle heavily.
This is it… I’m glad I brought them all despite the hassle.
Just as a smile began to spread on my face from the deep satisfaction welling up inside me.
“Shall we do it from behind today?!”
“……”
The atmosphere suddenly turned cold.
This is crazy.
Well… if she insists, I guess I will.
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