Cultivation Nerd

"Why would you even imply something like that?" I cringed.

"Well, she actually listens to you, and even under threat of death you look each other in the eye and support each other. Also, she picked you out of everyone else first. How did she even know your name?" My chubby friend fired one question after the other, making it clear that this was the sanest option from his point of view. "Also, the whole inner disciple problems, you had none of those like... ever. I bet she took care of them."

"Cool it with the fantasies there," I walked towards one of the stairs leading to the helm and sat down, looking toward the slowly disappearing town in the distance. "First of all, I am an engaged man."

"To a fiancee you have probably never met," my chubby friend played devil's advocate. "For all you know, she could be a seven-foot tall ogre with big feet."

"We did actually meet when we were younger, and I doubt she suddenly grew to become a monster," I looked up at the sky, and the sun rays gently landed on my face. Despite the rough wooden stairs I was sitting on, it felt comfortable. "A man is only worth as much as his word..."

I wanted no part in breaking off an engagement with anyone. That was asking for trouble in a place like this. If I was ever going to break off an engagement, I would ensure we both ended things on good terms.

Also, Song Song was too crazy, and the last thing anyone would ever want was to date someone like that. It took a certain kind of crazy man to deal with that type of woman. Double so when said crazy woman could also slap you to death.

Despite how my chubby friend here saw it, I doubted Song Song had any romantic interest in me. She was interested in my abilities and what I could help her with. This was not some lame romance drama where one character would like the other for no reason.

Before long, the guys came from below deck. Some of them wore smiles and gave me the good news that there was more than enough food for all of us. I would go and check that later in person to make sure. Some others also showed some fishing rods and smiled.

During our journey here, I had gotten to know these guys pretty well. They fought by my side, so there was no reason we couldn't have a little fun until we reached our destinations.

"What's happening?" My chubby friend asked.

"Have you never wanted to try fishing?" I asked.

....

Hours passed, and we were just a group of men with sticks in our hands and nothing to show for it.

There was no damn fish!

Despite my inner turmoil, I maintained a cool facade. While I considered my relationship with these guys friendly, as the de facto leader, I couldn't display illogical emotions.

I had to be the calm head in these waters.

"You look angry," my chubby friend commented.

"And you look like someone who would be easy to throw overboard," I retorted. "Can you swim?"

"Nah, but I can float," he smirked. "Also, the tidal wave I would create after slamming into the water would sink this ship."

Despite my annoyance for not catching any fish, I couldn't help but crack a smile. My chubby buddy knew how to be funny when he wanted to.

"Damn, you're probably right," I mock grumbled.

"Just be careful not to slurp down all our food, fatso," another guy commented with a smile on his face.

The smile that was slowly making its way onto my face slipped away, and I frowned, turning toward the guy who said that.

Sometimes, people got so absorbed into the mood that they thought they could just insult someone. Perhaps it was just the fatigue getting to him. This was going to be awkward as hell, but I would have to stand up for my chubby buddy here.

"What the hell did you just say to my friend here?"

"I..." he paled, realizing he had just gotten into deep shit. "I thought we were just joking."

The guy didn't seem to have meant it to be offensive, so I wouldn't do anything drastic, but it was better to explain how things worked here.

"I can say that because he's my best friend," I explained. "I can insult him, and he can insult me. But if some guy just comes around and calls my friend a fat slob, then we have a problem."

He looked even more confused. Relationships like friendship were weirder here. Or more correctly, they were just foreign to me. But my chubby friend and I had our own thing going on.

I was pretty sure his weight was just because of some martial technique he was practicing. But that was no reason I would tolerate someone else making fun of my friend.

"Just keep in mind next time, okay?" I patted the guy who spoke on the shoulder. "We have been through a lot together on this journey, so I won't toss you overboard. But be more mindful of your words here; you could have hurt my friend's feelings. He is a good guy and has been with me through thick and thin. I can't let somebody insult him like that."

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The guy mumbled an apology and went on doing his own thing. He would thank me later in life because if I was the typical xianxia guy, his cultivation would have been broken by now over a perceived slight.

Despite the moment of awkward silence, we returned to joking about fish and other stupid things.

….

Some more time passed, and someone finally caught something. It was my chubby friend who managed to hook a small sardine.

He held the fish in his hands, stood up, and pointed it at the sky, “Bow before me, mortals! I am the king of fish!”

“Oho!”

“The fish king!”

“Praise the fish king!”

It was an overall impressive performance and would have been the perfect scenario to lead into more of the usual foolishness guys got into while hanging out.

But sadly, at that exact moment, Song Song emerged with a calm look on her face. She looked ready to say something but stopped and looked at what was happening.

She saw my chubby friend parading a fish, and then her face scrunched in disgust. For some reason, she decided not to say anything about the fish and just added, "Soon, we will arrive at our destination. Everyone get ready."

With that, she closed the door and went back inside.

"This was a pretty fast journey," I turned toward the others with a serious look, as if we were not acting like absolute fools just two minutes ago. "We should hold a feast and eat as much as we can. Who knows when we will get our next comfortable meal. So go and get the food from the ship."

....

It didn't take long before we caught sight of the island in the distance. There wasn't much to say about it from so far away; it looked like any other island. There was a beach and some jungle-like greenery in the inner parts. The island seemed big, and the trees looked like we had suddenly arrived in some land where giants lived.

However, there was a worn-out dock for ships. As we got closer, an outer elder was there, and he waved us over.

Song Song came out again, and the Qi around her flowed smoothly. It seemed like she had spent some good time cultivating.

"Do you want to try sailing the ship there, or do you want me to do it?" She offered.

"Here, you do it," I handed her the wooden brick-like artifact used to control this ship.

She touched something on the wooden controls and smirked, "Do you think we could get away with acting like it was an accident and we crashed into the old bastard?"

Excuse me! What?

"No," I answered before she could follow her wilder impulses. "That would just be making unnecessary enemies for a not-so-funny joke."

She shrugged and sighed. The ship slowed down, and the sails furled by themselves as we settled onto the dock. As we walked out of the ship, with Song Song leading the group, the outer elder approached us and bowed toward Song Song.

"Lady Song, you're the first here, as expected from someone of your caliber," he said, clearly trying to butter her up. I never thought outer elders could be like this.

Just by the look in her eyes, she had already lost all respect for the elder, with the way he acted like a fool. While her words might suggest otherwise, Song Song didn't like people who were yes-men no matter what.

Also, what kind of background did she have to end up in a place where even elders shamelessly bowed their heads toward her.

"When will the exam begin?" Song Song inquired.

"Lady Song, I'm sorry to say this, but without the other nine inner disciples coming with their teams, the exams won't start. But you can get a look at the contestants. They're over that hill," he pointed in the distance toward a large peak. "You can look down at all of them. Do you need me to escort you there?"

“No need.”

She nodded, and we began walking toward the hill where we could oversee the newcomers.

On the way there, we entered the gigantic forest, and the average person would have had difficulty climbing over the root bumps that were taller than me.

We jumped over them at a leisurely pace, and Song Song was leading us, so I followed behind her. Until I decided to quicken my pace a bit and catch up with her, “So, you have even outer elders acting so polite with you. I don’t think I ever asked before, but what exactly is your position in the sect?”

Song Song chuckled as a playful look danced in her eyes, “I’m just another core disciple.”

Oh, well, that was something. Core Disciples were a step above even inner disciples, and there were only a handful of them at a time. They usually ended up as Core Elders or even the Sect Leaders if they survived long enough.

She wasn’t wearing the usual uniform a Core Disciple would wear, but that was understandable. Other rival sects always kept an eye on the Core Disciples and would be happy for them to have an "accident" so the next generation of the Blazing Sun Sect wouldn’t be so strong.

How the hell did my relatives get in contact with someone like her?

Before long, I asked her exactly that, “How did my relatives even find someone like you?”

That would be considered a bit rude to ask. However, Song Song had already told me she was a Core Disciple, which was quite a dangerous thing to reveal to someone she had barely met for some days. Perhaps she thought I had cousins in the inner sect and wouldn’t betray her.

She was right, but this recklessness of hers could end up getting her killed one day.

“To make a very long story short, my master knows Liu Qian’s master,” she shrugged.

Well, that was a short explanation, alright. Though it revealed pretty much nothing.

So far, I could roughly guess that she probably had a Core Elder as a Master and that my older cousin Liu Qian. Who from Liu Feng’s memories was the personal disciple of an inner elder. So perhaps they met each other when their teachers were hanging out.

At least this explained why my cousins had gone through the trouble of fighting that inner disciple for me. This connection with a Core Elder was probably what kept my relatives well and strong within the inner sect, and there had been no incidents about Elder Rong reacting to anything.

As we arrived atop the hill, we looked down, and there were hundreds, if not thousands of disciples down there. Some had set up some tarps on the grass and seemed to be trading while the others were resting and talking between themselves.

Most of these were going to end up failing the exam.

My eyes wandered through them trying to find anyone who stood out. While there were the usual guys around, it was nothing outside of expectations. The only one who really stood out so far was some red-haired guy.

Red hair was quite rare here. It was not even ginger, just blood-colored hair that if this were on Earth I would have thought it was dyed.

But I paid little attention to him after that and looked around for any other students who stood out in more than just their appearance.

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